User Tag List

First 23456 Last

Results 31 to 40 of 57

  1. #31
    Senior Member Pinker85's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Posts
    731

    Default

    Pie.
    "My comrades and my beloved, upon your way you shall meet men with hoofs; give them your wings. And men with horns; give them wreaths of laurel. And men with claws; give them petals for fingers. And men with forked tongues; give them honey words." --Kahlil Gibran, The Garden of The Prophet

  2. #32
    Wake, See, Sing, Dance Cellmold's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Posts
    5,810

    Default

    Well my mum managed to raise my brother and I while still working a career that, even now, demands 12+ hour shifts from her.

    I still don't know how she managed it. Oh relatives helped as well as day groups and nurseries, but I still saw her quite a lot.

    Nothing but respect and love for her.
    'One of (Lucas) Cranach's masterpieces, discussed by (Joseph) Koerner, is in it's self-referentiality the perfect expression of left-hemisphere emptiness and a precursor of post-modernism. There is no longer anything to point to beyond, nothing Other, so it points pointlessly to itself.' - Iain McGilChrist

    Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
    "Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
    Piglet was comforted by this.
    - A.A. Milne.

  3. #33
    Warflower Nijntje's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    MBTI
    CRZY
    Enneagram
    4w5
    Posts
    3,225

    Default

    I posted the original link, not out of any malice, but as a supporter to anecdotal evidence provided to me by girlfriends who have had children, (and often multiple children) saying they got foggy around the time of the new birth, mainly for things that didn't directly relate to the well-being and survival of their new addition.

    I have also seen it when i used to nanny, with new mothers being razor sharp on all things baby related, but a little fuzzy on remembering appointments or random facts (useless ones) that they used to know. I assumed hormones and lack of sleep would make anyone a little distracted at times.

    But i have also learnt, as someone who is childless that most of the time, my opinion regarding children is moot as they are not my own, and i "wouldn't understand". Which is fine.

    Terrible things happen to good people every day.
    Consequentially, I am not one of the good people.
    I am one of the terrible things.
    .



    Conclusion: Dinosaurs


  4. #34
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Enneagram
    5w6 sp/sx
    Posts
    17,579

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by violaine View Post
    It's not "fucking up" any of those things for me.
    That is good. Do you have friends or relatives with small children? How common is your positive post-partum experience?
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...

  5. #35
    Strongly Ambivalent Ivy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    6
    Posts
    24,060

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Redbone View Post
    This is, unfortunately, very true. I have seen fathers that take an active interest in their children's lives receive lavish praise, as if they were doing something extraordinary, while many mothers are just thought of as doing what mothers do for the same tasks.
    This is a true story. My sister and her husband just had a baby in April. She took her maternity leave immediately, and now he's taking his paternity leave (because he's fortunate enough to work for a company that offers it- most don't- worth pointing out that the company he works for is based in Switzerland). You'd think he cured cancer, the way people praise him for staying home (and not even permanently or even long-term- he gets the same amount she did, 12 weeks. When moms stay home "only" 12 weeks, there's usually some tsk-tsking from somebody).

    Most of the adjusting post-baby tends to fall on the mothers. Often her career is seen as optional, a luxury that only makes sense as long as the kids are doing well. If issues arise, I've never heard a father urged to quit his job to be home with his children.

  6. #36
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    9w1
    Socionics
    INFj None
    Posts
    9,827

    Default

    Yep. Anything dad does it's like he hung the moon. The kid has mismatched socks on and mom is a serial killer.

    I would say being a mother has screwed some things up for me. Some due to biology but more due to societal stupidity. Stretch marks are kind of unavoidable and so are, probably, the spider veins. The stress incontinence could probably have been prevented with better medical care. Chasing kids likely kept me thin longer than I would otherwise have been, seeing as how I didn't start to gain weight until my youngest was around seven years old. Sex life issues, for me, were temporary and would have likely been mitigated by a better support system. Brain fog is temporary. It may not look like it, but I was spacey before I had kids, so I can't really blame them for that. Social life and career . . . well, I'm a very introverted 9w1, so lets just say there probably wasn't much damage the kids could have done that wouldn't have happened anyway. I have the time and resources to have both now and I'm just not that motivated.

    I want things to be better for my kids, if they should choose to procreate, but I don't feel terribly rained on due to being a parent, myself. Yeah, they were a lot of work when they were little and it often was not much fun, but now they are generally a hoot and good company. I'll miss having them rattling around the house when they move out.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  7. #37
    violaine
    Guest

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    That is good. Do you have friends or relatives with small children? How common is your positive post-partum experience?
    Definitely common amongst my friends and acquaintances. Vast majority are combining motherhood with their career. There's a chef, pediatrician, two real estate brokers, tutor, solicitor, professor/head of biology dept, jewelry designer, model, special consultant to federal police, career counsellor, management consultant, entrepreneur, fashion designer, a few editors, a few photographers, a restauranteur.

    Something I have noticed is that the women who waited to have children until they'd established their careers have been able to stay in those careers after motherhood. Some of my friends who had children before that point have struggled with establishing themselves in a career. Though of those, there are some who haven't wanted to at all, or who say they want to, but don't seem to do much to make it happen. (Which I can understand because I do think that would be a tough to accomplish if you don't have a really strong drive or strong idea of what you want to do to compete with being a parent).

    My close friends and I have partners who are diligent fathers but none of us and none of them think that is extraordinary at all. I only know three men who are the primary caregivers, but again, no one makes a big deal. We are all inclined to think of what we're doing as team work.

  8. #38
    meh Salomé's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Posts
    10,540

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by violaine View Post
    I'm flattered you're following me around the board. Thanks for having my back, but that outdated research wasn't the thrust of my OP, so I didn't bother with it. Hence the phrase, "Further to Nijinte's link".
    You don't bother with scientific research (or anecdotal evidence) that doesn't support your position. I see. How very single-minded of you.

    Not following you around the board, just interested in the continuation of a discussion which started in one of my threads. Though I do seem to have drawn traffic to a thread that was floundering for complete lack of interest.
    You're welcome.

    You however, are apparently so obsessed with yours truly, that you'll trawl back THREE YEARS through my posting history, and to look for pictures of me. I gotta tell you, I don't find that flattering. I find it a bit weird and creepy, to be honest. I really hope you get over your obsession with me, and find better things to do with all that free time your nanny gives you.

    As for me, I changed my mind about being an egg donor when I learned about how those hormones they give you fuck with your brain. I don't mind doing a little for charity, for those less fortunate, but I'm not THAT self-sacrificing.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  9. #39
    violaine
    Guest

    Default

    I see you quoted me but you're on ignore and will be ignored as per instructions up thread from Ivy.

    ----
    Oh, you edited your post AFTER I responded? How very... Intellectually dishonest.

    In answer:

    1. Read the links.
    2. I have a phenomenal memory for people's incongruities. You have, literally, over 9000 posts. Impossible to avoid seeing in iSpy. The site has a search function. You figure out how little time it takes to remind you of your old posts.
    3. You spend your days posting on forums. Might want to take your own advice. Maybe even recoup that loan to Mac.
    4. Ah, fuck it. I just don't care as much as you.
    Last edited by violaine; 07-31-2013 at 11:27 AM.

  10. #40
    meh Salomé's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Posts
    10,540

    Default

    Awesome! I can't think of anyone I'd rather be ignored by.

    (If only all stalkers were this easy to get rid of.)
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

Similar Threads

  1. David Eagleman and Mysteries of the Brain
    By Vasilisa in forum General Psychology
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 04-20-2011, 12:16 PM
  2. Replies: 0
    Last Post: 09-20-2010, 01:53 AM
  3. Battle of the Brains... Hermy V's Looney
    By tinkerbell in forum Popular Culture and Type
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 09-13-2009, 02:23 PM
  4. Battle of the Brains... Hermy V's Looney
    By tinkerbell in forum Popular Culture and Type
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 09-13-2009, 02:16 PM
  5. society, a big image of the brain
    By UnitOfPopulation in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 09-20-2008, 05:37 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO