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Male Thinkers who are really Feelers in Disguise?

Elfboy

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I know there are more male feelers out there, but where are they? are they in hiding because they're too sensitive and afraid of what the world might think of their feelings? is anyone else here a male feeler?
 

KDude

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Lately I've been seeing posts that reduce feelers to "feelings"..

That might be a problem to begin with. I wouldn't blame someone from "hiding". When to comes to Fi or Fe however, this is all irrelevant. There's no reason that someone would hide. It has nothing to do with stripping away or shaping someone's sense of masculinity.

It is often hard to assign words to the values used to make introverted Feeling judgments since they are often associated with images, feeling tones, and gut reactions more than words. As a cognitive process, it often serves as a filter for information that matches what is valued, wanted, or worth believing in. There can be a continual weighing of the situational worth or importance of everything and a patient balancing of the core issues of peace and conflict in life’s situations. We engage in the process of introverted Feeling when a value is compromised and we think, “Sometimes, some things just have to be said.” On the other hand, most of the time this process works “in private” and is expressed through actions. It helps us know when people are being fake or insincere or if they are basically good. It is like having an internal sense of the “essence” of a person or a project and reading fine distinctions among feeling tones.

The underlined is the thick of it. At least for Fi, it's an internal value system. No one who has that hides it. For better or worse. They could be an artist or some kid who sticks to his inner convictions and doesn't give in to peer pressure or some person who fights for some cause.. whether they're some pacifistic environmentalist OR some aggressive marine. All of them are using Fi and it doesn't mean anything specifically in it's most general form. Not enough to hide from others at least.
 

Arclight

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I am an F dom and totally over emotional..

Observe me.. and understand why some men hide or control this side of themselves.. I used to as well..
I am just a bit broken right now..
I look forward to the day when I can compartmentalize my feelings again.

Emotions and testosterone can be pretty volatile.
 
T

ThatGirl

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You're not really helping the whole pro feeler man thing.
 

entropie

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I walked with my gf thru the town the other day and we came by 2 times at a street musician. He was playing a guitar and signing, no song I knew. When we approached him the second time, my girlfriend told me she's going to buy a CD from him. I was surprised but went with her and she got a CD from him. When looking at the CD we found out the music is all his and he has a label that produces his music. He prolly just likes to play in the streets, so he wasnt even a beggar or so.

The thing is, my gf does that not out of the good of her heart, no she does that cause she likes the music and wanted a CD. I am different I wouldnt even have recognized the man while passing by him.

This made me wondering, tho I am generally not a disrespectful being and tho I value human company above all else, this only works so far from me. I am big at exploring theories or ideas that intgrest me but I am not very big at exploring human personalities. I definitly have a gift for understanding a personality before really talking to him, but this gift isnt really developed, it more jumps to concrete assumptions which are often wrong and form a wrong image of a person for me.

My gf is different, she is fundamentally intrest in humans, you could call her a scientist of humanology. To me human studies or psychology just never appealed, I cant even say why they just didnt and I deidnt join this site because I wanted to know more about others, rather more about myself.

I dont necessarily think that you need to be an asshole to be a good T-type, as it is with all things in life, the balance is important and I agree with what KDude said: A F - type just is a F-type. One does probably see it the most in primary F-types.

Feelings are a different story, feelings can have all sorts of motivations and they cant really be a strength of F-types only. There's a quote by Mark Twain I think that goes like: "The man that is ahsamed of the most things, is the most respectable one" and I think this means that feeling and sensitivity have a lot to do with intelligence and your imagination of how it could be for others on the world.

There are many people who can outsmart me in a second by knowing every author to every book once written and think they are intelligent. They are, their intelligence can be compared to that of a harddrive; but to learn the language of F-types and to understand their intelligence that's a challenge, because their intelligence nearly always involves making the toughest and personally most unpleasant decisions in life
 

Elfboy

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Male feelers trump T guys in bed.

hahaha, you obviously haven't romantically seen many ENFPs or ESFPs, we're great in bed :devil: FP males have a much better sense of sensuality and are better at satisfying their partners. of course, if the feelers you've slept with where underconfident and overly emotional, I can see why you'd say this. your average Casanova or Don Juan is probably an ENFP 7.
 
T

ThatGirl

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hahaha, you obviously haven't romantically seen many ENFPs or ESFPs, we're great in bed :devil: FP males have a much better sense of sensuality and are better at satisfying their partners. of course, if the feelers you've slept with where underconfident and overly emotional, I can see why you'd say this. your average Casanova or Don Juan is probably an ENFP 7.

Omg! You guys are sooo cute!

*pinches your cheeks*
 

entropie

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hahaha, you obviously haven't romantically seen many ENFPs or ESFPs, we're great in bed :devil: FP males have a much better sense of sensuality and are better at satisfying their partners. of course, if the feelers you've slept with where underconfident and overly emotional, I can see why you'd say this. your average Casanova or Don Juan is probably an ENFP 7.

You know how they say: "the ones who need to brag with it, can only suck at it" :)
 

Elfboy

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my question was poorly written. I was not suggesting that men should be more emotional or irrational (this is a HUGE misunderstanding about Feelers, especially FPs. many of us are less emotional than most Ts). I just wish guys would be more open with their F side. for instance, being more romantic, appreciating art more, being more empathetic and being better with children and more openly affectionate. I know not all guys are good at all these things, but sometimes I feel like a freak being an NF male and I think there are a lot more male Fs out there than I'm seeing.
 

Elfboy

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You know how they say: "the ones who need to brag with it, can only suck at it" :)

lol, I wasn't really referring to myself actually. I'm gay :yes: that being said, I'm sure there are a lot of straight guys out there who are F.
 

entropie

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Well appreciating art will be difficult for me and I am not a big fan of clichees, so I dunno for romantic. :) But with being more openly affectionate and empathetic you're right, I'll need to improve on that and others could aswell :)
 

IZthe411

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It's funny to identify male feelers who don't recognize that they are feelers or even deny it. Some fight it as if it an insult to their masculinity.
 

entropie

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It's funny to identify male feelers who don't recognize that they are feelers or even deny it. Some fight it as if it an insult to their masculinity.

Yes tho the greatest challenge would be being able to show ones emotions and still not loosing the respect as a masculine authority figure. I tell you people are just afraid of challenges, they dont appreciate the fun in choosing to go on the toughest way :)
 

Elfboy

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Well appreciating art will be difficult for me and I am not a big fan of clichees, so I dunno for romantic. :) But with being more openly affectionate and empathetic you're right, I'll need to improve on that and others could aswell :)

I think a lot of women need to be LESS empathetic sometimes. several women I know take it too far and expect people to empathize with every little thing they do. if you are not empathetic about everything, it's probably a good thing (although as you said, getting better at it never hurts). for instance, if someone is exhibited emotionally neurotic, unstable, clingy or unhealthy behavior, being too warm and F-ish with things can actually encourage them to continue this behavior. in this case, empathy is good for finding out the cause of this behavior and letting them know what they're really doing and how they should deal with their problems more effectively (this is a good example of using N, F and T at the same time)
 

IZthe411

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Yes tho the greatest challenge would be being able to show ones emotions and still not loosing the respect as a masculine authority figure. I tell you people are just afraid of challenges, they dont appreciate the fun in choosing to go on the toughest way :)

I have a few F guy friends who aren't afraid to show it. It's admirable; I think they've rubbed off on me somehat. I just don't do the crying LOL
 

KDude

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I think a lot of women need to be LESS empathetic sometimes. several women I know take it too far and expect people to empathize with every little thing they do. if you are not empathetic about everything, it's probably a good thing (although as you said, getting better at it never hurts). for instance, if someone is exhibited emotionally neurotic, unstable, clingy or unhealthy behavior, being too warm and F-ish with things can actually encourage them to continue this behavior. in this case, empathy is good for finding out the cause of this behavior and letting them know what they're really doing and how they should deal with their problems more effectively (this is a good example of using N, F and T at the same time)


I'm just as critical as I am empathetic. They go hand in hand as far I'm concerned. Where there may be strong empathy in one place, there could be disappointment somewhere else. And this isn't exactly out of the ordinary for men.. I think many men unashamedly do it all of the time. For example, if I was out and about and invited to a party.. and noticed that everyone was trying to ditch some guy or girl, impolitely leaving them hanging or something, I might be disgusted in all of them, punk them out right to their faces, and not go myself... convinced that it was a bad idea and a waste of my time to hang out with people like that. I mean, what's really in the forefront is my own particular point of view and what's being violated. Not empathy. Empathy is a byproduct of that. And it's selective. If that makes sense. I don't empathize as a thing in and of itself. If anything, that's probably more common with Fe. To contrast it with the Fi definition given above:

The process of extraverted Feeling often involves a desire to connect with (or disconnect from) others and is often evidenced by expressions of warmth (or displeasure) and self-disclosure. The “social graces,” such as being polite, being nice, being friendly, being considerate, and being appropriate, often revolve around the process of extraverted Feeling. Keeping in touch, laughing at jokes when others laugh, and trying to get people to act kindly to each other also involve extraverted Feeling. Using this process, we respond according to expressed or even unexpressed wants and needs of others. We may ask people what they want or need or self-disclose to prompt them to talk more about themselves. This often sparks conversation and lets us know more about them so we can better adjust our behavior to them. Often with this process, we feel pulled to be responsible and take care of others’ feelings, sometimes to the point of not separating our feelings from theirs. We may recognize and adhere to shared values, feelings, and social norms to get along.
 
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