I'M A MAN
Laid here with the advertising sliding past my eyes like cartoons from other peoples lives,
I start to wonder what it takes to be a man.
Well I learned to drink and I learned to smoke and I learned to tell a dirty joke.
If that's all there is then there's no point for me.
So please can I ask just why we're alive?
'Cos all that you do seems such a waste of time
and if you hang around too long you'll be a man.
Tell me 'bout it. Your car can get up to a hundred and ten -
you've nowhere to go but you'll go there again
and nothing ever makes no difference to a man.
I am not Jesus though I have the same initials -
I am the man who stays home and does the dishes.
And how was your day?
Is that woman still trying to do your head in?
A man told me to beware of 33.
He said, "It was not an easy time for me".
But I'll get through
even though I've got no miracles to show you.
I'd like to make this water wine
but it's impossible.
I've got to get these dishes dry.
Oh and I could be a genius
if I just put my mind to it
and I, I could do anything
if only I could get 'round to it.
Oh we were brought up on the Space-Race,
now they expect you to clean toilets.
When you have seen how big the world is how can you make do with this?
If you want me I'll be sleeping in -
sleeping in throughout these glory days.