isn't max too caring, other-directed etc. to be ISTP?
I don't think Max is really that caring and outwardly focused towards others' feelings and social harmony. I think he just cares a lot about his family and loves his wife very much; this is not a trait that is only attributable to Fe.
He seems way too laid back about the familial hierarchy and the structure of the house to be a J or an Fe dom. I think the reason he cares so much about figuring out Tara's illness is because his Ti wants to get down to the truth of situation and understand it as much as possible.
He is generally very laid-back and mellow with most stressful situations; Se just knows very well how to improvise and keep things together. He has a good grasp on tertiary Ni and inferior Fe in that he is generally attune to his family's needs, but he approaches most situations with Ti and Se.
I think Tara is ENFJ because she, unlike Max, does seem to be very motivated by keeping her family together and being as fair as she can be to them in lieu of her illness. She wants everybody, including herself, to be open with their feelings because Fe relies on sincerity in communication for interpersonal issues. She also just gives off the vibe of wanting familial cohesion/unity, much moreso than Max or anybody else in the family. I think she is an Ni-er because she has a really good idea of how other people perceive her, and she uses this understanding to benefit herself. Without Tara, I think the family would be more or less in shambles.
I think the relationship between Tara and Charmain does a good job of illustrating the fundamental Fe/Fi disagreement (Charmain being ESFP). Tara is consistently annoyed with Charmain's stubborn spirit and whimsical desires and perceives her as self-centered because Charmain is reluctant to try and understand Tara's situation and be sensitive to it. Charmain, on the other hand, is consistently annoyed with how Tara just expects her to be understanding and accepting of the situation. She sees this as intrusive and stifling to her own whims.
I think the only reason that people think Tara is ISFP is because she's a painter/artist, but SFPs in no way have a monopoly on this field.
kate's creepy ex-boss INFP? hmmm... could be.. but isn't he like too manipulative & forcefull to be infp ?
I don't really think he's that manipulative. I think he is just really clueless about the whole Kate situation and sincerely believes that she is interested in him. Si got the idea stuck in his head from when they first hooked up, and Ne will find connections between anything she does to support the idea.
I think he is most definitely an Fi dom because he has no qualms with projecting his own feelings and beliefs onto a situation; he doesn't seem to care to be particularly attuned with the way others are feeling (the whole restaurant thinks he's a perv, and he's completely oblivious), but instead freely expresses his own emotions, regardless of how appropriate it is to maintaining social propriety, something that is more attributable to Fi/Ne than any other function combo.
I also don't think that being "forceful" is something that uncommon with INFPs. A lot of them are very in tune with their own ethical beliefs and feelings, and though they may not be trying to, they can often project their own feelings and ethics into a situation, coming across as stubborn and relentlessly persistent.
other than her actual type, don't you think it's strikingly odd that kate doesn't have any friends through the whole two seasons? not counting lynda or her love interests, she has no one. and you can hardly ever see her talking to anyone else than her family. even marshall has had more interactions with people outside the family (or should i say the most? seems like he's the only one to have any actual friends on the show)