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View Poll Results: Should the word Bossy be banned?

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  • Yes

    2 8.33%
  • No

    22 91.67%
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  1. #51
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    Lets just ban everything.

  2. #52
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DiscoBiscuit View Post
    Lets just ban everything.
    :banned:

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  3. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    :banned:

    Lol should have seen that one coming.

  4. #54
    LL P. Stewie Beorn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    Are you saying that it's only annoying when they're on the bottom of the hierarchy? Why are they more likely to be on the bottom of the hierarchy, in your view?
    I never said anything about the bottom. It's just that as a child you're less likely to notice if someone's being bossy at the top of the hierarchy and more likely to notice if they're not.

    Why was your MOM on the bottom of the hierarchy?
    She wasn't. She was bossy in that she told us what to do and didn't do it herself. Because she was above me hierarchically I didn't actually notice this when I was a child or consider her bossy. It's only upon reflection as an adult.

  5. #55
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beorn View Post
    I never said anything about the bottom. It's just that as a child you're less likely to notice if someone's being bossy at the top of the hierarchy and more likely to notice if they're not.
    You did say that it bothered you when girls ignored the hierarchy and bossed everyone around -- and you said they're more likely to do that than boys are. So, wouldn't that mean that it bothers you when girls behave like they're higher on the totem pole than they really are?

    Quote Originally Posted by Beorn View Post
    She wasn't. She was bossy in that she told us what to do and didn't do it herself. Because she was above me hierarchically I didn't actually notice this when I was a child or consider her bossy. It's only upon reflection as an adult.
    If your dad had behaved the same way, would you use the same word choice to describe him, with the same connotation? Would it have bothered you as much?
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    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
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  6. #56
    LL P. Stewie Beorn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    You did say that it bothered you when girls ignored the hierarchy and bossed everyone around -- and you said they're more likely to do that than boys are. So, wouldn't that mean that it bothers you when girls behave like they're higher on the totem pole than they really are?
    Yes, but I said that goes for everyone and not just girls. It also annoys me when people are elevated up the totem pole when they shouldn't be. In high school the captain of my soccer team was the best athlete and the most popular, but he didn't have an ounce of leadership in him and was a total follower. It annoyed the hell out of me.

    If your dad had behaved the same way, would you use the same word choice to describe him, with the same connotation? Would it have bothered you as much?
    Why don't you just ask: "Are you sexist?"

    It's conjecture. I don't know.

  7. #57
    LL P. Stewie Beorn's Avatar
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    Btw, last time I heard bossy was yesterday in another forum when a 40 yo straight man said he was fired for being too bossy.

  8. #58
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beorn View Post
    Yes, but I said that goes for everyone and not just girls. It also annoys me when people are elevated up the totem pole when they shouldn't be. In high school the captain of my soccer team was the best athlete and the most popular, but he didn't have an ounce of leadership in him and was a total follower. It annoyed the hell out of me.
    But why would girls be more likely to behave this way? Generally from your experience, which rules are they ignoring?
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  9. #59
    Level 8 Propaganda Bot SpankyMcFly's Avatar
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    My ESFP wife "accuses" me of being bossy all the time in Spanish. The word she uses is 'mandon', for women it's 'mandona'. In English though we don't modify words based on the gender/sex of the person. Perhaps this has a small part to do with why this is an American thing?

    I do find it bossy to be telling us what not to do and it oversimplifies, with no empirical evidence that word use/selection has the outcomes they are implying. The research used to support lack of female participation in classrooms is over 20 years old but for the sake of argument, let's say yes, there is a problem of young girls willing to pursue leadership roles. Does a single word have much to do with that? I'd say that most reasonable people, even the proponents would agree that it doesn't. What then is the purpose of framing the "real issue" in this manner? Sure it raises awareness. Ok, I get that, but it shifts the focus from a positive one to a negative one.

    Hey BanBossy, stop being so bossy and telling us what not to do. Just Do It (tm) (teach young girls leadership vs. framing the issue on a single word)
    "The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents... Some day the piecing together of dissociated knowledge will open up such terrifying vistas of reality, and of our frightful position therein, that we shall either go mad from the revelation or flee from the light into the peace and safety of a new Dark Age. " - H.P. Lovecraft

  10. #60
    Level 8 Propaganda Bot SpankyMcFly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SD45T-2 View Post
    IIRC, Rory Miller (author, veteran martial artist and retired corrections sergeant) said that there is a big difference between a leader and a manager boss. If you can't figure out what the difference is, it's safe to assume that you are a manager boss.
    Totally agree.
    "The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents... Some day the piecing together of dissociated knowledge will open up such terrifying vistas of reality, and of our frightful position therein, that we shall either go mad from the revelation or flee from the light into the peace and safety of a new Dark Age. " - H.P. Lovecraft

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