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View Poll Results: Do you believe rape culture exists?

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  • Yes

    47 72.31%
  • No

    18 27.69%
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  1. #501
    Assassin from the future Qloshae's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    And in BDSM, that permission is given beforehand, after the respect has been thoroughly earned and double-checked (if done properly at least), with a safe word in place and clear hard and soft limits. One of the reasons people engage in BDSM is because handing over that power to someone you trust can bring you even closer together as you *know* they have your welfare and pleasure in mind. Similarly, having someone trust you with their body like that, and embrace the...more raw edges of your person can produce an incredibly high and feeling of humility and gratitude at the same time - a kind of faith you wouldn't dream of snatching away. It's akin to that falling-exercise where you trust the other person will catch you - it builds trust and intimacy. Again - when done correctly.
    I take it you are all for BDSM?
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  2. #502
    Entertaining Cracker five sounds's Avatar
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    @SilentMusings, so I haven't read all your posts in this thread but I'd like to respond to a few things I noticed.

    1) I am a woman who respects men who take on traditionally female roles. I actually begin to lose respect when a man is so concerned with his masculinity that he refuses to take on a traditionally female role. It makes me feel like he wouldn't be willing to work with me to accomplish all if the duties that come with living together. I'd much rather take out the trash than fold clothes. If he doesn't mind folding clothes, and would prefer it over taking trash out, I'd hope his man pride wouldn't get in the way of working together.

    2) men still don't need game. And there have always been women who consider compatability and character first when choosing a mate. My grandmother was born in 1920 and married a man with a golden heart who struggled their whole lives to make ends meet. She told me of a man who she could have married who was wealthy as the result of a good job he had, and she chose my grandfather out of love.

    However, if you want someone who financial security is most important for, those women have always and still exist today.
    You hem me in -- behind and before;
    you have laid your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

  3. #503
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Qloshae View Post
    I take it you are all for BDSM?
    I'm all for anything people desire doing as long as it is consensual

    But yeah, I took an interest in researching the BDSM world and its psychology a couple of years back
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





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  4. #504
    Strongly Ambivalent Ivy's Avatar
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    ^very well said, @five sounds. Let me show you guys a pic of my very manly husband:



    (He's the bearded one standing up, not the behatted fellow sitting down. The boy is our son.)

    Now let me tell you that we both work full-time and share the housework equally (along with both the kids, who do their part as well- both our daughter AND our son). And we appreciate each other far more with this setup than we did when I was home with our first child and he worked to support us, which was difficult for us both and we both felt spread thin. The equitable arrangement is far superior, for us. And he spent hours walking and singing and patting that little guy on the back when he was a baby to get him to sleep without nursing to sleep, because if I nursed him to sleep he would wake up when I tried to scratch my nose. He was a difficult baby and my husband was amazing with him. And I was eternally grateful because without his help I would not have gotten any damn sleep. This is a man whose masculinity is not threatened by sharing either the breadwinning or the housework/childrearing with me.

    photo (12).JPG
    Last edited by Bellflower; 06-17-2014 at 08:27 PM. Reason: fixing bad link (or trying to)

  5. #505
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    Quote Originally Posted by Qloshae View Post
    @SilentMusings, please explain these "innate gender differences" you are talking about.
    Are you aware that gender is a social construct? Because unlike your sex which is what you have between your legs and other sex specific biological qualities, gender is a creation of society.
    http://www.who.int/gender/whatisgender/en/
    Gender is a social construct now? Great! I get to hit feminists like you without feeling bad. I don't have to do women any special favours anymore just for having a pussy between their legs.

    Be careful what you wish for.

    Quote Originally Posted by Qloshae View Post
    Anecdotal experience is not fact.
    Nothing you can say here will convince me that women respect men who supplicate to them. It doesn't turn anybody on.

  6. #506
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    Quote Originally Posted by five sounds View Post
    @SilentMusings, so I haven't read all your posts in this thread but I'd like to respond to a few things I noticed.

    1) I am a woman who respects men who take on traditionally female roles. I actually begin to lose respect when a man is so concerned with his masculinity that he refuses to take on a traditionally female role. It makes me feel like he wouldn't be willing to work with me to accomplish all if the duties that come with living together. I'd much rather take out the trash than fold clothes. If he doesn't mind folding clothes, and would prefer it over taking trash out, I'd hope his man pride wouldn't get in the way of working together.
    Masculinity is dependent on differentiation between how men and women operate. What is there for a man to identify with, just as a man, if there are no differences in how men and women function, in their roles? Me having a penis and you not isn't enough for me to create a sense of identity and purpose distinct from you. This is something that women just don't seem to understand; by tearing away at every traditional male domain, we lose our identity, what makes us men....whereas there will always be things that women can do, like having children and nursing them, which men can't do.

    You might rather take out the trash than fold clothes. If your husband doesn't mind changing that is OK, but I do not think it should be encouraged as a model. And people who choose another arrangement should not be demonized for rejecting "trendy" lifestyles.

    Quote Originally Posted by five sounds View Post
    2) men still don't need game. And there have always been women who consider compatability and character first when choosing a mate. My grandmother was born in 1920 and married a man with a golden heart who struggled their whole lives to make ends meet. She told me of a man who she could have married who was wealthy as the result of a good job he had, and she chose my grandfather out of love.

    However, if you want someone who financial security is most important for, those women have always and still exist today.
    As a man, I can tell you that learning just a little bit of game has helped me a lot. There are a lot of misconceptions about what game actually is, but that's for another time.

    What I am really trying to get at here is that women are now looking to a type of man who is just going to give them a quick ride then move on. Because that is all they want, often. This isn't about love at all, nor is it about character - that's laughable. The culture doesn't suit me and I am brave enough to admit that. But it isn't right, either. As these women will find out when they are older.

  7. #507
    Assassin from the future Qloshae's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kullervo View Post
    Gender is a social construct now? Great! I get to hit feminists like you without feeling bad. I don't have to do women any special favours anymore just for having a pussy between their legs.

    Be careful what you wish for.
    Uh, the vagina is genetic, meaning it is part of their SEX, not gender.
    Male, female - Sex
    Masculine, feminine - Gender
    Those terms are separate, but coexisting at this point in time.
    In fact, if feminists got their way, there would be sexes, not genders because genders are the reason for a lot of the inequalities.

    What would threaten someone with physical violence over the internet accomplish (I don't really think you thought that through)?

    I really don't think you read my post.

    Nothing you can say here will convince me that women respect men who supplicate to them. It doesn't turn anybody on.
    Kinda irrelevant to what you quoted me on? I mean, what you quoted me on was just saying that anecdotes should not be considered facts.
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  8. #508
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    some males make me think of this song. except i'm sure ben folds is making fun and they're being serious

    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

  9. #509
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    Quote Originally Posted by Qloshae View Post
    Uh, the vagina is genetic, meaning it is part of their SEX, not gender.
    Male, female - Sex
    Masculine, feminine - Gender
    Those terms are separate, but coexisting at this point in time.
    In fact, if feminists got their way, there would be sexes, not genders because genders are the reason for a lot of the inequalities.
    Masculinity is a product of being male. Femininity is a product of being female. However, there is a concerted effort to eliminate unique masculine identity, as I mentioned above.

    Inequality exists because men and women are not the same.

    Quote Originally Posted by Qloshae View Post
    What would threaten someone with physical violence over the internet accomplish (I don't really think you thought that through)?

    I really don't think you read my post.
    I don't think you really consider the implications of wanting to eliminate gender. I was hypothetically saying that if you don't consider femininity to be real, there is no reason why i shouldn't treat you like I would a man.

  10. #510
    Assassin from the future Qloshae's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kullervo View Post
    Masculinity is a product of being male. Femininity is a product of being female. However, there is a concerted effort to eliminate unique masculine identity, as I mentioned above.
    Again, you ignore the definitions.
    Masculinity is not a product of being male, a man cleans the house, cooks the food, wears a pink dress and plays with dolls, is he masculine?

    Inequality exists because men and women are not the same.
    If you truly believe that then make some examples instead of just making an empty statement.

    I don't think you really consider the implications of wanting to eliminate gender. I was hypothetically saying that if you don't consider femininity to be real, there is no reason why i shouldn't treat you like I would a man.
    Well, I am a man, what's the problem?
    Outside that, how you justify treating people is your problem, not my problem and isn't really the problem of society either.

    That said, I treat men and women the same with the difference that I perceive women differently based their compatibility with me and I can be sexually aroused by them. I don't however make up irrational excuses so I could feel justified treating them like sex objects to discharge my temporary hornyness. I still treat them with the same respect I treat anyone else with.

    You should try it, girls totally LOVE guys who respect them, even lesbians! (tho they will still not be sexually attracted to you - the lesbians that is)
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