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View Poll Results: Do you believe rape culture exists?

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  • Yes

    47 72.31%
  • No

    18 27.69%
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  1. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by yeghor View Post
    Define bitch.
    Somewhat cuntish.

  2. #42
    Senior Member Opal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by yeghor View Post
    What should the women be taught as to how to treat men?
    Caution.

  3. #43
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    Yep, victim-blaming. Probably the core of rape culture IMO.
    I see victim-blaming as more of a symptom. The core of rape culture is the fundamental notion that women and men are so fundamentally different, that what is right, normal, and permissable for one is not so for the other. It is a part of gender bias.

    Quote Originally Posted by kyuuei View Post
    I have never talked to a single female in the military that was not at least sexually harassed to the point of being highly uncomfortable at their work environment around a particular male. I'm not talking a simple cat-call, or a single joke. I mean serious enough that they are grated by the issue constantly. Every single one. There was no one left behind on that statistic. And these guys are suppose to be the upstanding 'best of the best' professionals that civilians look at with admiration many times.
    FTR, I never experienced sexual harrassment during my time in the military, and the handful of women I knew well on active duty would say the same. Perhaps it differs from one service to another, or for officers vs. enlisted. I'm not saying it isn't a huge problem, just not absolute in scope as you describe.

    Quote Originally Posted by kyuuei View Post
    II think rape culture is a strong phrase intended to excite, and I think it definitely doesn't get across the message it is intended to.. When you're trying to work WITH someone (i.e. men) you don't go around immediately accusing them of rape and put them on the defense. If someone told me they thought I was part of a rape culture I'd tell them they don't fucking know me and gtfo my nuts. It's a great way to shut someone down. Feminists went entirely the wrong route. The point of the issue is to get something done.. and no man is going to admit that they participate in rapey behavior. You'd think, with as PC and 'educating' as the proponents and activists of the movement against this culture type are, that they'd be more PC about the way they address the issue. But no. It was immediately, "You men RAPE women, and if you don't you contribute to it with this." I'd like to have seen it as more of an anti-apathy movement. Because that's really what's at the heart of it all--apathy. People stopped caring about total strangers. It isn't just seen in the men vs women thing, or the 'rape culture' thing, it's seen everywhere.
    I agree. Treating peaceable folks like criminals alienates valuable allies, whatever the goal.

    Quote Originally Posted by Hard View Post
    I take issue with the term "rape culture" in other countries though (such as the US). I feel it's not an apt description, and is used by people who are pissed off. Rightfully so, but I don't take well to things that smell of emotional pleading or guilting. When people start shouting "YOU SHOULD FEEL BAD" I just turn off and ignore the person. I ain't got the time nor patience for that kind of BS behavior. I've had a few people at my grad school (never happened at undergrad though) actually get visibly mad at me because I said I didn't want to engage in a conversation about rape culture. Saying things akin to "well, you're part of the problem then!". You know, people have limits to the number of causes they can actively care about. Just because I don't want to talk about it, or get annoyed when other people go on and on about it, doesn't mean that I don't want things to get better. It's like, you can't win unless you throw all your weight at it. Nope, I am not having that.
    I agree here also. What good did feeling bad ever do? Doing good is exactly that - doing, and no one of us can solve every problem. It is good to be aware so we don't inadvertently contribute to the other ones, but if each of us picked just one thing we would actively work on, the world would already be a better place.

    Quote Originally Posted by yeghor View Post
    What should the women be taught as to how to treat men?
    With directness, awareness, and a focus on their (his and her) common humanity.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...

  4. #44
    I could do things Hard's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    I agree here also. What good did feeling bad ever do? Doing good is exactly that - doing, and no one of us can solve every problem. It is good to be aware so we don't inadvertently contribute to the other ones, but if each of us picked just one thing we would actively work on, the world would already be a better place.
    That is a very important point as well. There is a huge difference between not participating, and not paying attention. The latter in my opinion isn't ok, nor an excuse. I pay very close attention to this, and try to be cautious/careful of how I treat people. Granted, I am a gay man so I rather have it easy when it comes to these issues and women, as being gay removes you from it by a significant portion. It's a chunk of the reason I just stay out of it. The way I "help" is by correcting people as I see it and come across from it, and listen attentively if I am called out for doing something wrong. I haven't, at least from what I can remember, but that goes for most anything. At the end of the day, just do the best you can, and know your limits.
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  5. #45
    royal member Rasofy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    Something else that may be of interest to the thread:

    Rapists Explain Themselves On Reddit And We Should Listen

    / trigger warning, obviously, though maybe this entire thread should have that label on it
    Very disturbing.

  6. #46
    Senior Member yeghor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by solipsists View Post
    Caution.
    Isn't that like seeing every middle easterner as a terrorist?

  7. #47
    Senior Member Opal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by yeghor View Post
    Isn't that like seeing every middle easterner as a terrorist?
    I may be overly-cautious, but I see caution as healthy. I treat women with caution despite being physically stronger than most. More broadly, physical brutality is only one of many ways one can damage another, and there are millions of destructive forces masquerading as gentle.

  8. #48
    Senior Member yeghor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by solipsists View Post
    I may be overly-cautious, but I see caution as healthy. I treat women with caution despite being physically stronger than most. More broadly, physical brutality is only one of many ways one can damage another, and there are millions of destructive forces masquerading as gentle.
    What do you notice as signs of violent nature in men?

  9. #49
    Senior Member wildcat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ginkgo View Post
    Yes or no?

    EDIT: Shit, meant to make a poll. Could a mod do that for me? Thanks.
    I lost many friends with the Polanski affair.
    The Americans did not understand my point.
    My point was: I am no judge.
    Therefore I am not on the side of the ideologists. The ideologists abuse the victim.
    I am on the side of the victim alone..
    My point had nothing with Polanski being a good movie director.
    Or a persecuted Jew of the Nazi era. There is no excuse for rape.

    I consequently remain on the side of the victim.
    Rape culture exists everywhere.
    In my country and in your country.
    Definitely in the police department of both countries.

  10. #50
    Senior Member Opal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by yeghor View Post
    What do you notice as signs of violent nature in men?
    Honestly I couldn't tell you. In real situations I get vibes I could dissect if prompted to, many stemming from the ways men carry themselves (as well as their interactions with partners, though at that point it's too late).

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