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  1. #31
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by anti-villain View Post
    I think the targets are absolutely disgusting. But I don't see taking up boxing, chopping wood, or playing sports being that much better an outlet for the pent up anger that would have been otherwise directed towards said target. It's the same thing. This person has mad you extremely angry, so holding onto that anger, you go plow someone to the ground playing football, knock someone out cold in a boxing match, or grab an axe and chop some wood? Is that not rehearsing as well? I don't see the difference.

    You're conditioning yourself to require that physical outlet for anger, instead of learning to deal with it properly.
    If the person is imagining each target as being the ex, then that could be rehearsing for an imaginative sort of person. If it is letting out frustration with an idea of developing a skill or getting something accomplished without imagining that one is harming an ex, then it is a healthy distraction.
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  2. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by fia View Post

    Edit: You know who else is going to buy these? Abusive men. I can easily see an abuser buying one to resemble his partner and having it shot up as a warning and reminder of her submission to him. Anyone can buy these, right? Would that be legal? Would that be a form of abuse? Absolutely.
    EXACTLY.

    Who will buy these? Men who have restraining orders legally filed against them, those who have had court ordered anger-management sessions, a history of petty violence or juvenile delinquency...and of course the American Psychos who can hide it better under an educated, professional facade who can afford to pay their exes to STFU and not prosecute them.

  3. #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by kyuuei View Post
    While I cannot say punches don't kill, most people have the impression in their heads that a punch will not deliver devastating results. Everyone has wanted to just sock someone in the face for whatever reason... but it is sort of the 'safe' thought. Punches don't (typically) kill, and most people don't believe they have the capacity to punch someone and kill them. Most people (rightfully) believe if they punch someone it'll hurt a while, and then that person will recover within a week.
    Most people who fight also know how to hit without doing damage or leaving marks. One of the reasons I knew my ex would never actually seriously hurt me despite his violent tendencies (or the reason why I trusted him, and it wasn't just wishful thinking on my part) was because he was really good at fighting, he fought with men, including his father, and he never hit me the way he would hit a man. In the two occasions that he actually slapped me he hit me in ways and in places that he knew wouldn't seriously injure me or leave obvious marks.

    Of course some people say men like him are the most insidious abusers, because certain kinds of women will never consider it the abuse that it is because there's never any punching or black eyes or broken bones, but I knew he knew how to hurt people...and how to hit people without hurting them. He's the person who told me how to shoot a person to incapacitate an attacker without killing them.

    People who don't know their own strength are actually more dangerous, IMO. Someone who has repressed anger who just kind of freaks out and beats up someone randomly probably has more of a chance of accidentally killing them, or doing serious damage.

    I also agree with your main point that most people won't die from being punched (though there are ways to kill people this way, or cause brain damage) and that shooting people is more likely to result in deaths.

  4. #34
    ✿ڿڰۣஇღ♥ wut ♥ღஇڿڰۣ✿ digesthisickness's Avatar
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    Most abusers tend to not waste time on fake targets. That's how they get arrested, end up in anger management, and people get dead. Many abusers do draw disgusting images of women and violence and call it art. But, shooting at a target doesn't necessarily mean anything.

    I think it's more pathetic than anything and shows just how much money people have to waste. Seriously, can you not make your own target? How hard can that be? I won't say that I haven't done some violent shit to pictures and objects when angry at someone. I have, and I will again if need arises. And, I felt better doing it and afterwards too. I just didn't waste my money doing it.
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  5. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by digesthisickness View Post
    Most abusers tend to not waste time on fake targets. That's how they get arrested, end up in anger management, and people get dead. Many abusers do draw disgusting images of women and violence and call it art. But, shooting at a target doesn't necessarily mean anything.

    I think it's more pathetic than anything and shows just how much money people have to waste. Seriously, can you not make your own target? How hard can that be? I won't say that I haven't done some violent shit to pictures and objects when angry at someone. I have, and I will again if need arises. And, I felt better doing it and afterwards too. I just didn't waste my money doing it.
    I disagree with this. There are different kinds of abusers. There are abusers who are outright sociopaths, I'm pretty sure one of my older friends was married to one, he did things like follow her to her cousin's house and cut the phone lines (back before everyone and their brother had a cell phone) and actually BEAT HER.

    Men like that would easily buy targets like this for fun or recreation, or between abusive relationships.

    I don't think my ex would be one of those kinds of men, he would find the outward expression of it being so calculated (rather than poor emotional impulse control, which is one my exes actual problems) evil and frightening, I know it.

    I think he'd agree with me that a lot of yuppies who have paid off their ex wives probably would buy one of these for their back yard. You know, those men are also dangerous, because they are simply educated, wealthy sociopaths.

    I would be scared of a man who owned one of these, regardless of whether or not he'd ever been convicted of domestic violence, because it doesn't say good things about his attitude or intentions.

    I would find this a lot more understandable if it was called "the abusive mom" target, like someone who had been beaten or otherwise abused by his mother as a child.

    But some dude who is practicing some kind of narcissistic sense of two year old rage against a dummy because an ex broke up with him or something is not someone I want to know.

  6. #36
    ✿ڿڰۣஇღ♥ wut ♥ღஇڿڰۣ✿ digesthisickness's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmotini View Post
    I disagree with this. There are different kinds of abusers. There are abusers who are outright sociopaths, I'm pretty sure one of my older friends was married to one, he did things like follow her to her cousin's house and cut the phone lines (back before everyone and their brother had a cell phone) and actually BEAT HER.

    Men like that would easily buy targets like this for fun or recreation, or between abusive relationships.

    I don't think my ex would be one of those kinds of men, he would find the outward expression of it being so calculated (rather than poor emotional impulse control, which is one my exes actual problems) evil and frightening, I know it.

    I think he'd agree with me that a lot of yuppies who have paid off their ex wives probably would buy one of these for their back yard. You know, those men are also dangerous, because they are simply educated, wealthy sociopaths.

    I would be scared of a man who owned one of these, regardless of whether or not he'd ever been convicted of domestic violence, because it doesn't say good things about his attitude or intentions.

    I would find this a lot more understandable if it was called "the abusive mom" target, like someone who had been beaten or otherwise abused by his mother as a child.

    But some dude who is practicing some kind of narcissistic sense of two year old rage against a dummy because an ex broke up with him or something is not someone I want to know.
    Okay, we see it differently. Cool. Other than the fact that I wouldn't put a guy like that at the top of my dating list either. I didn't say it made him/them look lovable or safe, just not necessarily a budding serial killer or abuser-in-training. Abusers actually abuse. They like it, it works for them, and it wouldn't surprise me if they laugh at these idiots for being passive-aggressive and nonproductive.
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  7. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmotini View Post
    Repressing anger is not "dealing with it properly." Releasing anger physically is totally appropriate, as much as crying is appropriate for releasing pent up sadness or stress.

    Psychologically it's much more damaging to focus on a specific target. Releasing feelings physically is not the same as psychologically focusing on a target.
    I didn't say anything about repressing anger, and becoming a ticking time bomb. I'm saying that redirecting it towards another human being in a sport where you're beating each other with fists, or shooting an image of a human being are both equally unacceptable to me. If you want to go for a run, or whatever, that's completely different, since, as you said, you aren't focusing violent energy towards a target. If I was more articulate, I would have originally said it the way you just did.

  8. #38
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    Being rejected by a lover always hurts. And if we are unable to take responsibility for our own hurt, we naturally blame someone else, and we try to hurt them.

    But in trying to hurt them, we damage ourselves as lovers.

    For instance, can our next lover expect us to blame them and try to hurt them? And the answer is, yes.

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