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  1. #61
    Senior Member Beargryllz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by spamtar View Post
    You might be right but in particular after the substantial passage of time and having moved on and out as an adult it seems like a pretty shitty thing for a person to do to their father.
    I gather a person is right in placing little value on their abuser. This is not always the case, but it would be the ideal case. Many people go out of their way to protect their abuser.

  2. #62
    Aquaria mrcockburn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nerd Girl View Post
    :LAUGH: Abuse? Hardly.



    What a drama queen!
    So...what exactly would be considered abuse in Nerdvana?
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  3. #63
    Senior Member ICUP's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beargryllz View Post
    I gather a person is right in placing little value on their abuser. This is not always the case, but it would be the ideal case. Many people go out of their way to protect their abuser.

    True. I ended up hating the hell out of my mom and dad not at the time as much as I did years later. I had time to think on it, and I had matured. I would've probably exposed my own family given the chance. I think the reason being that I felt they deserved it, and I hated the disfunctionality of being forced into keeping it a secret. Same reason why I have publicly told that I had bpd. It's sortof like sticking up a middle finger to anyone who doesn't like it, and to anyone who thinks I shouldn't say it. I think it's healthy, honestly, because it's a way to rid myself of shame and embarrassment attached. I see it as being the right move for her, and gutsy. At the same time, I think it may suggest that people may be becoming healthier and more apt to tell when someone is being a creepy asshole?

    I think it's also healthy in that, she has been victimized. And victims many times feel later that the abusers should care to change, but they don't. It's a way to force change. At some point, acceptance takes ahold.
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  4. #64
    Ghost Monkey Soul Vizconde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beargryllz View Post
    I gather a person is right in placing little value on their abuser. This is not always the case, but it would be the ideal case. Many people go out of their way to protect their abuser.
    Yeah I guess as I have seen women protect serial domestic violence for much worse acts. I guess it would have to come down to a totality of the circumstances. If he was a dick for a substantial amount of their relationship then perhaps she had his dish of revenge properly served cold.
    I redact everything I have written or will write on this forum prior to, subsequent with and or after the fact of its writing. For entertainment purposes only and not to be taken seriously nor literally.

    Quote Originally Posted by Edgar View Post
    Spamtar - a strange combination of boorish drunkeness and erudite discussions, or what I call "an Irish academic"

  5. #65
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beargryllz View Post
    It exposes crime committed by a public official. To not reveal it would be socially irresponsible and morally unjustifiable.
    I understand your point, but I'm not aligned. I don't think there's anything wrong with the way he and his wife spanked their 16yr daughter. She 'back talked' and stole. He tried to get her to turn over; apparently he only wanted to spank her butt. Since she didn't listen, she took it on the legs too. And why wouldn't she listen? Maybe for the dramatic camera effects.

    What’s rebellious girly doing now? Betraying her Dad in the worst way. That’s what I call "socially irresponsible and morally unjustifiable."

  6. #66
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    Quote Originally Posted by mrcockburn View Post
    So...what exactly would be considered abuse in Nerdvana?
    "time outs"

  7. #67
    Senior Member Beargryllz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nerd Girl View Post
    I understand your point, but I'm not aligned. I don't think there's anything wrong with the way he and his wife spanked their 16yr daughter. She back talked and stole. He tried to get her to turn over; apparently he only wanted to spank her butt. Since she didn't listen, she took it on the legs too. And why wouldn't she listen? Maybe for the dramatic camera effects.

    What’s rebellious girly doing now? Betraying her Dad in the worst way. That’s what I call "socially irresponsible and morally unjustifiable."
    Many people feel that threatening and using violence on others is wrong. I understand that a person may feel justified in the use of violence to protect oneself or others. I do not feel that this interpretation of self-defense is applicable for this scenario.

  8. #68
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nerd Girl View Post
    I understand your point, but I'm not aligned. I don't think there's anything wrong with the way he and his wife spanked their 16yr daughter. She 'back talked' and stole. He tried to get her to turn over; apparently he only wanted to spank her butt. Since she didn't listen, she took it on the legs too. And why wouldn't she listen? Maybe for the dramatic camera effects.

    What’s rebellious girly doing now? Betraying her Dad in the worst way. That’s what I call "socially irresponsible and morally unjustifiable."
    What would be deemed as socially responsible and morally justifiable on her part?

  9. #69
    Ghost Monkey Soul Vizconde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nerd Girl View Post
    Maybe for the dramatic camera effects."
    This is a relevant point. I remember getting spanked with a newspaper and how it didn't hurt a bit but it made a loud thud. I would scream bloody murder from each spank but it was pure acting talent. I don't know if may parents knew or not.

    So if I knew there was a secret video camera going on filming the family affairs I would have upped the drama gotten an Oscar for my performance. Maybe even instigated the parent so that they played their part to a tee. Video would have been pretty boring if she similarly submitted and got a few smacks on the butt.

    I notice that Nancy Grace is now jumping on the bandwagon of journalists who wish to exploit this story. This gives me pause to consider if this is really just a black and white one sided story and what the social implications of an overreaction would be.
    I redact everything I have written or will write on this forum prior to, subsequent with and or after the fact of its writing. For entertainment purposes only and not to be taken seriously nor literally.

    Quote Originally Posted by Edgar View Post
    Spamtar - a strange combination of boorish drunkeness and erudite discussions, or what I call "an Irish academic"

  10. #70
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    Quote Originally Posted by YWIR View Post
    What would be deemed as socially responsible and morally justifiable on her part?
    Treating her parents with respect: saying "yes sir, yes ma'am" and not stealing things she didn't work hard to pay for. At 16, she should know better.

    A whippin' is minor compared to what one should expect to get in the real world for such offenses (as an adult). Talk back to the wrong person on the streets and get your butt kicked or killed. Steal and get thrown in jail where you also might get your butt kicked or killed. There's no friendly "time out". Weak.

    I predict she'll learn all of this the hard way and regret. You watch, this won't be the last time her face makes the news.

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