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  1. #141
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    Quote Originally Posted by AphroditeGoneAwry View Post
    It is interesting to me how abuse is transferred from generation to generation. I guess learned behavior can become more ingrained in one than, say, contemplating better alternatives or solutions to problems.
    Well, I’m glad my parents never used timeout or any other form of mental abuse, or foul mouthed verbal abuse on me. My parents just didn’t use such tactics and if they had, I wouldn't have respected them.

    Quote Originally Posted by mujigay View Post
    You know, I kind of find your point of view fascinating.

    Plenty of kids I knew were treated similarly to your description, but then rebelled, and vowed to never laid a hand on their children. You, instead, seem to have decided that it was an effective form of discipline. Perhaps it was a difference in the attitude of your parents? If it's not too nosy to ask, and I understand if it is, but did they administer the belt as discipline or out of sheer anger? Because the common thread for the kids I know who have sworn to never touch the belt was that their parents didn't treat it as a learning experience so much as an outlet for frustration, and oftentimes the parents were drunk. And more often than not they got insults screamed at them at the same time.
    Good questions! When I was spanked, I didn’t get the impression my parents were taking out their anger on me; it was controlled and planned like they meant serious business. The rules were clearly defined and I quickly learned they said what they meant and they meant what they said, and that’s just the way it was!

    It’s important to note, that my parents set the behavioral standards in my household by respecting each other and living up to what they expected of me. They have a great marriage and fight once in a blue moon, so it was an all around ideal stable environment for a kid. They are truly the best of the best. <3

  2. #142
    failure to thrive AphroditeGoneAwry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nerd Girl View Post
    Well, I’m glad my parents never used timeout or any other form of mental abuse, or foul mouthed verbal abuse on me. My parents just didn’t use such tactics and if they had, I wouldn't have respected them.


    Good questions! When I was spanked, I didn’t get the impression my parents were taking out their anger on me; it was controlled and planned like they meant serious business. The rules were clearly defined and I quickly learned they said what they meant and they meant what they said, and that’s just the way it was!

    It’s important to note, that my parents set the behavioral standards in my household by respecting each other and living up to what they expected of me. They have a great marriage and fight once in a blue moon, so it was an all around ideal stable environment for a kid. They are truly the best of the best. <3

    lol. k.

    You might want to take a parenting class...or two.....if you decide to procreate.

    Jus sayin'...
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  3. #143
    Senior Member wildflower's Avatar
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    nerd girl, i don't know if you are basing your views on scripture but if so you may want to consider that some things in the OT (old testament) are not done today. like: an eye for an eye, stoning rebellious children and adulterers, etc. we are under the new covenant and many OT rules are no longer practiced because of jesus' crucifixion. furthermore, some passages are hyperbole and not to be taken literally such as the verse about plucking out one's eye or cutting off one's hand if it causes one to sin. fyi, i'm not a liberal and yes i believe the whole book is true but it still must be interpreted in context and taking into consideration the literary style of a particular book.

    check out this blog by an online friend of mine for another perspective: abandon image. she has a whole series on spanking about halfway down the first page. check out this post in particular: why do some christians reject spanking? peace.
    Last edited by wildflower; 11-08-2011 at 10:02 PM. Reason: added examples of hyperbole

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