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Thread: Where do you draw the line with preventing bullying?

  1. #21
    Senior Member Array Viridian's Avatar
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    Dec 2010


    The main problem, as I see it, is that it looks a bit like putting the burden on the bullied (she needs to look more acceptable) rather than the bully (s/he needs to stop harrassing people for not being Adonises and Aphrodites). As long as the surgery is safe, I see nothing immoral about it, but we need to focus on the main issue, IMO. It's a bit like the whole "teaching women how to avoid being molested but not teaching men not to molest" issue.

  2. #22
    Senior Member Array Lark's Avatar
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    Jun 2009


    Quote Originally Posted by kyuuei View Post
    What inspired it:

    No right and wrong answer here.. I just want some opinions. This woman said adults are the worst (ouch?! I can't imagine.. I'd deck someone bullying a small kid..) but she got her 7 year old plastic surgery (nothing WAY MAJOR, the ears got 'adjusted' to be more 'normal') to avoid bullying and self-esteem issues.

    Here's the question line-up for those who like structured answers.

    To what extent would you go to to prevent bullying for your children? (Or hypothetical children if you don't have any.)
    Do you think the mother is justified in her reasoning? The little girl seemed to be okay with it now.. would she regret this decision later in life?
    If you find this all okay.. where would you draw the line when it comes to preventing bullying, and teaching your child and children around yours self-acceptance?
    One of my aunts had this sort of cosmetic surgery done on all her kids because she was concerned about their appearences, not simply bullying at school but just their esteem throughout their entire lives.

  3. #23
    Honor Thy Inferior Array Such Irony's Avatar
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    Jul 2010
    5w6 sp/so
    LII Ne


    There's no way to stop all bullying but I think it could be drastically decreased if schools took more measures to prevent it from happening or at least nip it in the bud. All too often bullied kids are told things like "don't be such a crybaby" and "don't let them get away with it next time" or "just fight back", which do nothing to lessen the hurt experienced from bullying. Kids who bully sometimes get away with more than they should because they are able to get on the school staff's good side or the staff just doesn't see it as a significant enough issue.

    Plastic surgery isn't guaranteed to solve the problem. The ears may look better but I watched the video and they didn't look all that bad in the first place. Plus the kid was adorable. Who cares about the ears? Bullies will find a way to put you down and there isn't always a good reason. If its not ears, its something else. Some other misshappen facial feature, or some piece of clothing you wear, or your name, or your accent, etc. Some things kids tease about can be fixed, but is it feasible and do you really want to sacrifice your self-identity? You can choose to not wear certain clothes but do you want to switch to something you don't like just because its the style? You can opt for plastic surgery, but that's not a very feasible option. What if the kid wants plastic surgery but the parents flat out say "No?" What if plastic surgery isn't affordable?

    There are some things kids bully other kids about that cannot easily be changed if at all. A kid can't just legally change their name on a whim. A severely overweight kid can lose weight but it isn't going to happen overnight and genetically they could have some medical disorder or just bad genes that's causing the excess weight. A kid with a learning disability cannot just wish it away. That's why its so important that teachers and other school staff work harder to prevent and reduce bullying.
    5w6 or 9w1 sp/so/sx, I think
    Neutral Good

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