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  1. #181
    Senior Member Lateralus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by entropie View Post
    Ya, everytime you make someone do something because you think he did something wrong it is called abusing your power.
    I don't think you thought this through before you posted it.
    "We grow up thinking that beliefs are something to be proud of, but they're really nothing but opinions one refuses to reconsider. Beliefs are easy. The stronger your beliefs are, the less open you are to growth and wisdom, because "strength of belief" is only the intensity with which you resist questioning yourself. As soon as you are proud of a belief, as soon as you think it adds something to who you are, then you've made it a part of your ego."

  2. #182
    The Dark Lord The Wailing Specter's Avatar
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    My mother has done far worse…

  3. #183
    Senior Member lowtech redneck's Avatar
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    Holy Necro, Batman!

  4. #184

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    I like hot sauce.

  5. #185
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lark View Post
    I like hot sauce.
    me too
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

  6. #186
    Temporal Mechanic. Lexicon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by prplchknz View Post
    me too
    Me 3. My mom used to do the hot sauce for swearing punishment. My brother made the mistake of admitting he loved hot sauce (out of spite), so he got soap instead.
    I actively cried in protest & pretended to hate hot sauce for years to avoid the soap.

    I fuckin' love spicy stuff.

    The OP is old, but for the record, no I don't consider it abuse. Absurd, yes, absolutely. Effective? Who knows.
    Any negative reinforcement could become abuse if carried out a particular way, so it's really dependent upon the individuals involved, as to whether or not an action like this would be truly abuse. Overall I find inflicting pain/humiliation on a child to "teach them a lesson" degrading, & needless.
    03/23 06:06:58 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:06:59 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:21:34 Nancynobullets: LEXXX *sacrifices a first born*
    03/23 06:21:53 Nancynobullets: We summon yooouuu
    03/23 06:29:07 Lexicon: I was sleeping!



    04/25 04:20:35 Patches: Don't listen to lex. She wants to birth a litter of kittens. She doesnt get to decide whats creepy

    02/16 23:49:38 ygolo: Lex is afk
    02/16 23:49:45 Cimarron: she's doing drugs with Jack

    03/05 19:27:41 Time: You can't make chat morbid. Lex does it naturally.

  7. #187
    Retired Nicki's Avatar
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    A lot of people in this thread are overreacting regarding the hot sauce. But the cold showers do sound a bit cruel and unusual.
    I really like cats and food.

  8. #188
    Senior Member Bamboo's Avatar
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    For me it's more a matter of how the punishment was carried out than the actual punishment itself.


    Regardless of severity, any sort of punishment like this, from a literal smack on the wrist to a beat down, works by creating pain which creates avoidance. It doesn't teach the child why not to do something, it doesn't teach the child how to control themselves better, it doesn't teach the child cooperation with the family.

    In theory, I like the idea of a quick smack as punishment. No crazy emotional episodes, just, I don't like this, here's a smack, ok it's done, leave me alone.

    But in practice this doesn't teach the child how to avoid being punished again. The child might say bad words and not be able to control themselves. This creates fear, anxiety, and perhaps stoic acceptance that they're just going to be punished and that's that. None of which help a child develop.

    At the same time, complex reasoning is beyond the scope of a typical child. You can explain to them why crossing the street is bad, but they probably won't listen that well. But even a small child has the emotional capacity to understand "you don't cross the street BECAUSE I SAID SO". Those fear limits can in theory keep them safe.
    Don't know how much it'll bend til it breaks.

  9. #189
    Don't pet me. JAVO's Avatar
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  10. #190
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bamboo View Post
    For me it's more a matter of how the punishment was carried out than the actual punishment itself.


    Regardless of severity, any sort of punishment like this, from a literal smack on the wrist to a beat down, works by creating pain which creates avoidance. It doesn't teach the child why not to do something, it doesn't teach the child how to control themselves better, it doesn't teach the child cooperation with the family.

    In theory, I like the idea of a quick smack as punishment. No crazy emotional episodes, just, I don't like this, here's a smack, ok it's done, leave me alone.

    But in practice this doesn't teach the child how to avoid being punished again. The child might say bad words and not be able to control themselves. This creates fear, anxiety, and perhaps stoic acceptance that they're just going to be punished and that's that. None of which help a child develop.

    At the same time, complex reasoning is beyond the scope of a typical child. You can explain to them why crossing the street is bad, but they probably won't listen that well. But even a small child has the emotional capacity to understand "you don't cross the street BECAUSE I SAID SO". Those fear limits can in theory keep them safe.
    You can whip them and also explain. When my kids were little if they did something like run into the street, I would do a smack, and then I would tell them I did not want them to run into the street because a car might hit them and then they would be road kill and I would cry and cry.

    I only spanked for intentionally hurting someone (the irony), putting themselves or someone else in danger, or direct defiance. And not always then. But I always, always, always explained even when I was pretty sure they were too little to understand. But until (and sometimes after) they get to a certain age you can talk or yell until your jaw falls off and they don't care. What means something to them is consequences and you can't let them face the natural consequences of running into the street or climbing out of their car seats.

    But I never did hot sauce. That's weird to me, but maybe that's because I wasn't raised that way. I did a little rub of soap on the tongue, but I made sure it wasn't toxic and tasted it myself first. I usually tested punishments on myself before I did them to the kids. I've known of parents that squirted dish soap into their kids' mouths or spanked bare butts (that weren't already bare). Those aren't things I could be comfortable with, either. And I don't think if I was doing things again now I'd soap their tongues. There are better ways to do things.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

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