This is why I don't like living in the South. Everyone wants to shoot you or kick your ass for the slightest thing. Kids with BB guns even like to split the difference and shoot your ass.
Believe me, I hate it here, and I would love to go North. I just don't have any way to get there yet, and kicking my ass will just land me in one of your hospitals and extend my stay. So please DON'T kick my ass if you want me to go.
Luckily, I live in Dallas... and this city is somehow miraculously insulated from much of Southern culture, to the point of having partial public transportation and skyscrapers. Southern accents aren't even ubiquitous here. That's probably why I haven't had my ass kicked yet.