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  1. #11
    Artisan Conquerer Halla74's Avatar
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    I spoke with an Army recruiter last year.

    You are disqualified from enlisting for having GERD (acid reflux).

    I wonder how many other trivial ailments disqualify people from enlisting?

    Maybe RLS (restless leg syndrome) is a showstopper too...

  2. #12
    it's tea time! Walking Tourist's Avatar
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    Instead of dropping bombs, how about if we drop donuts on any enemy country. Oh, and chocolate bars, too. And bags of chamomile tea Just get 'em fat and sleepy. They'll have no interest in fighting.

    Quote Originally Posted by Quinlan View Post
    One day when everyone is fat, there will be peace on earth.
    I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle and here is my spout. Every time I steam up, I give a shout. Just tip me over and pour me out.

  3. #13
    Ghost Monkey Soul Vizconde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dieselephant View Post
    Just hide all of the food in the country we need to attack.
    Quote Originally Posted by Walking Tourist View Post
    Instead of dropping bombs, how about if we drop donuts on any enemy country. Oh, and chocolate bars, too. And bags of chamomile tea Just get 'em fat and sleepy. They'll have no interest in fighting.
    :yim_rolling_on_the_
    I redact everything I have written or will write on this forum prior to, subsequent with and or after the fact of its writing. For entertainment purposes only and not to be taken seriously nor literally.

    Quote Originally Posted by Edgar View Post
    Spamtar - a strange combination of boorish drunkeness and erudite discussions, or what I call "an Irish academic"

  4. #14
    Don't Judge Me! Haphazard's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Halla74 View Post
    I spoke with an Army recruiter last year.

    You are disqualified from enlisting for having GERD (acid reflux).

    I wonder how many other trivial ailments disqualify people from enlisting?
    Yeah, I was looking at the list of disqualifying conditions, I have three, possibly more conditions that would disqualify me from serving in the military!

    I mean, who do they allow into the military, anyway?
    -Carefully taking sips from the Fire Hose of Knowledge

  5. #15
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    There's a reason for this. I hear people at work say they never drink water or milk - so apparently they're only drinking sodas and juice? Maybe not even natural juice but the high fructose sweetened kind? Then people on their break eat two candy bars with a full-sugar regular pop.

    I made a comment today about how a person needs at least 800 calories a day on average to survive. The person responded, "Wow, 800 calories....that's like if you only ate one meal at McDonalds and one bag of chips all day."

    Um....

  6. #16
    Senior Member Winds of Thor's Avatar
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    This is pretty funny Peguy!
    "..And the eight and final rule: If this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight."
    'Men are meant to be with women. The rest is perversion and mental illness.'

  7. #17
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    I don't think that fat people are undermining American security. I think that the over-abundance of unhealthy food and the glaring presence of industrialized propaganda are undermining American security.

    In all likelihood, we're probably just going to rely more upon arms and technology to defend us in the future to compensate for our gluttony.

  8. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mystic Tater View Post
    I don't think that fat people are undermining American security. I think that the over-abundance of unhealthy food and the glaring presence of industrialized propaganda are undermining American security.

    In all likelihood, we're probably just going to rely more upon arms and technology to defend us in the future to compensate for our gluttony.
    I just had the funniest picture of futuristic military affairs in my head.

  9. #19
    . Blank's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Edgar View Post
    Have you ever seen a fat terrorist?
    Yeah; they're always cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs.
    Ti = 19 [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Te = 16[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Ne = 16[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Fi = 15 [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Si = 12 [][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Ni = 12 [][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Se = 11[][][][][][][][][][][]
    Fe = 0

    -----------------
    Tiger got to hunt, bird got to fly;
    Man got to sit and wonder why, why, why;
    Tiger got to sleep, bird got to land;
    Man got to tell himself he understand

  10. #20
    full of love Kingfisher's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Haphazard View Post
    Yeah, I was looking at the list of disqualifying conditions, I have three, possibly more conditions that would disqualify me from serving in the military!

    I mean, who do they allow into the military, anyway?
    i tried to enlist in the marines about 5 years ago. they turned me away because of burns i had suffered in the past. i had thought my health and physical fitness would make me a shoe-in.
    but if i had been accepted i would have been serving a year later, instead of meeting my wife. so thanks, marines!

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