To be fair, the modern Republican Party sucks big, floppy donkey dick. The Democrats are no better, but the Republican Party of the 2000s is a caricature. They rode into power in '94 on the small-government platform, and then turned into warmongering, big-government monsters once they controlled every branch of government.
The conservatives I've talked to think that all politicians are horrible and choose on the basis of who they think will ruin things the least. It's never the Democrat.