Death: What's the problem?

[Salomé]

See I do understand that people wish to prolong their lives. What I don't understand is why.

Then you don't understand it, you simply know it.
But I don't believe that at all, unless you have a death wish.
Everything can be reduced to the old "Selfish Gene" argument - 'if it wasn't that way, we wouldn't be xy z'.
People aren't rational, any more so than your average lettuce - this much you must know OB1?

The real joke, to me, is that people waste their lives concerned about it and only when it is imminent do they finally realise that their efforts and concerns are futile. Personally I hope to have no regrets on my death bed.

As opposed to wasting your life talking about how other people waste theirs ?

I know I will regret spending so much time on these navel-gazing forums

 

[Poser]

What's the problem with death? That would be having to explain it to your children when their pet frog dies. It was a good learning experience for them but you still wish you could shield them from pain.

 

[Totenkindly]

What's the problem with death? That would be having to explain it to your children when their pet frog dies. It was a good learning experience for them but you still wish you could shield them from pain.

That is a good point.

I remember when my kids went through it, they found a bird in the front yard and wanted to take care of it... but we knew that it wasn't going to make it. It was interesting how each of the three dealt differently with it.

The ESFP was all excited over the bird and the most active in caring for it, then expressed sadness when we told him it wasn't going to live but overall did fine even when it died. [He's also the one who flushed his dead beta fish down the commode wholeheartedly, then decided later sadly that he should have buried it instead.]

The INFJ Fe'ed her way through it all and was quiet but compassionate and resilient.

The INTP (and the eldest of the three) acted somewhat detached from it until the bird finally expired, then burst into sudden tears and said, "But we never even named it."

So we named the bird, then buried it in the back field.

 

[BerberElla]

The beleif in an afterlife is, to me, a beleif in humanity, or individuality. I prefer to beleive that death isn't just it because I don't like to see something special disappear.

I prefer to believe that too, but I just can't believe it, I have no faith that anything other than nothingness awaits after.

I know death is inevitable, but really I'm not very happy about it. It upsets me to think that one day i will just cease to be, that all people have is one trip around this world with barely enough time to experience everything that life can truly be especially if what life they have lived is full of suffering, life just seems so pointless at times.

I have heard all the platitudes, and tried them out to see if I could live with them, but none of that takes away the fact that one day I will die. Now if only I was one of the genius types and able to come up the cure against death, or even a way to increase my lifespan to a few thousand years.

All of the discoveries I won't be around to see, like when we finally launch a real life star trek enterprise , I just don't won't to miss it all and for some silly reason evolution thought we would be better off with a century if we are lucky, and a good few of those years spent as old and decrepit.

There is so much wrong with death.

 

[Salomé]

The INTP (and the eldest of the three) acted somewhat detached from it until the bird finally expired, then burst into sudden tears and said, "But we never even named it."

Word! We so messed up!

 

[Totenkindly]

Word! We so messed up!

yeah, i did the same thing he did when I was young.

I kept my feelings inside (sometimes was not even sure what I was feeling)... but we had outdoor cats, and we lived in the country, and it was very common for them usually to die because they got hit by cars speeding on the country roads.

And when that happened, I was the one who take them out back and bury them. My ISFJ mom and sis would not touch them or even think of doing that, they were just cats and they had no duty to them; but with me, I remember thinking about how horrible it was to die alone in pain along the road, hit and then discarded, and how someone should be there for them at least at the end of all things, and since I had it in my power to do that, I was going to be there for them.

Death didn't seem to resonate much with the other people in my family, they just ignored it if at all possible. But with me it raised large large questions and brought those weird feelings of loyalty and compassion to the forefront... although like I described above, it tended to be abstracted and philosophical at least in the questions I asked.

I don't know.
Death matters.
I don't think I'll ever reach a point where I'll just shrug it off.

 

[Salomé]

^I want to be Jennifer when I grow up.

 

[Virtual ghost]

I don't know.
Death matters.
I don't think I'll ever reach a point where I'll just shrug it off.

I am curious.

Would you like to be able to do that?


(The question is actally for everybody.)

 

[ByMySword]

I don't know if there's a heaven or hell, but I do believe in an afterlife. I find it hard not to. Sure it could be something we psychologically tell ourselves to make us feel better, though.

But my beliefs of the afterlife come from a belief in a higher power, so they're kind of linked. I think its something thats just beyond human comprehension. And because of that, its not something I really dwell on that much anymore.

Death doesn't matter to me anymore. I'm not afraid to die nor do I let danger deter me. In fact, I find myself looking for danger moreso than anything else.

 

[Totenkindly]

I am curious.
Would you like to be able to do that?

No.

I think death is a natural boundary of the universe.
Thus, if I'm to understand life and the "way of things," I need to be subject to it.
If I shrugged it off, my understanding of the world would lessen.

"Truth at all costs," correct?
Even if those costs include inconvenience, suffering, and/or death.

 

[Xander]

I'm thinking you might regret that you never showered me with more flattery and chocolate and exotic jewelry, and that I'm willing to give you an opportunity to resolve that potentially emotionally painful issue for yourself before you reach that sad sorry state of things.

Cuz I care.

Note to self - Pelt Jennifer with dark chocolate upon meeting.

Check.

Only the living worry.
The dead worry about nothing.

Not true, there's worms and necrophilia to consider.

Then you don't understand it, you simply know it.

True. A slip of the tongue.

Btw, where the sam hell where you when I said the same darn thing on INTPc years ago.

Smartass.

I am curious.

Would you like to be able to do that?


(The question is actally for everybody.)

Because death is irrelevant to life, so why worry.

 

[Totenkindly]

Note to self - Pelt Jennifer with dark chocolate upon meeting.

Dude -- When do you want to meet up???!!!
*looks for closest gas station*

Not true, there's worms and necrophilia to consider.

But you're dead.
You won't feel a thing.

 

[INTJMom]

To my mind that's more caring about what you do with your life than beating death. Were you to have not tried then it's a worry you have to deal with whlst alive. Afterwards you're unlikely to care.

You are right. Afterwards, I am unlikely to care, even though I do believe in an afterlife. The afterlife I believe in will be so blissful that there will be no room for regrets or pain or sorrow or crying.

 

[Xander]

Dude -- When do you want to meet up???!!!
*looks for closest gas station*

The BP at the top of the road... though you may need to fill up before then... you got satnav? Just type in CV2 BP station... it should find it... how's about 9pm or so?

But you're dead.
You won't feel a thing.

That's what they say isn't it...

Freaky no?

Who says your mind is entirely biological... scarier still if you don't get this whole out of body thing and are trapped exactly where you get laid to rest...

 

[cafe]

The pain in death at this point, for me, is in the missing. Definitely rooted in selfishness, but what isn't?

When my grandma died, I did want her back. I didn't care. Almost ten years later, I'd still give almost anything for ten minutes with her. I'd give almost anything to smell her again for an instant, to hear her ask me if I shouldn't bundle up, to feel her thin, wrinkly skin. I miss her. Nothing rational about it, but I see no reason why it would have to be. Rationality is only part of what makes us.

My own death, it's like when you are a little kid and you don't want to sleep because you still want to play or something's going on and you don't want to miss it. No matter where you stop, the story doesn't seem finished yet.

If there is nothing, I guess I don't mind so much. Sometimes nothing would be a relief.

 

[Xander]

You are right. Afterwards, I am unlikely to care, even though I do believe in an afterlife. The afterlife I believe in will be so blissful that there will be no room for regrets or pain or sorrow or crying.

Exactly why I don't really have a problem with belief. You believe you'll be all blissful and as far as I'm concerned I'm getting in on the longest slumber party ever conceived. By that point in time I'm guessing a rest will look mighty attractive... (cynical as that may sound).

 

[INTJMom]

...
Because death is irrelevant to life, so why worry.

Death is not meant to be irrelevant to life.
Death makes us appreciate life.
Today is a new day. We should make the most of it.
Life is for living and for loving.
We are here to love one another.

 

[INTJMom]

...
Who says your mind is entirely biological... scarier still if you don't get this whole out of body thing and are trapped exactly where you get laid to rest...

That's a good point. I don't believe we are entirely biological.
Your "mind" or "soul" is an invisible entity that will live forever.


btw: I like dark chocolate too.

 

[Anja]

What cafe said.

When I see something that strikes me as particularly beautiful I think how much I don't want to let go of all the beauty the earth has to offer.

 

[Totenkindly]

btw: I like dark chocolate too.

:steam: Hey, find your own Chocolate Daddy -- this one's taken!

When I see something that strikes me as particularly beautiful I think how much I don't want to let go of all the beauty the earth has to offer.

I like what cafe said, + this.

Which reminds me of this:

It was one of those days when it's a minute away from snowing and there's this electricity in the air, you can almost hear it. And this bag was, like, dancing with me. Like a little kid begging me to play with it. For fifteen minutes. And that's the day I knew there was this entire life behind things, and... this incredibly benevolent force, that wanted me to know there was no reason to be afraid, ever. Video's a poor excuse, I know. But it helps me remember... and I need to remember... Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world I feel like I can't take it, like my heart's going to cave in.