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  1. #131
    Senior Member Rambling's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AffirmitiveAnxiety View Post
    Do you think the status of alpha is important?
    I think the status of alpha weakens society, because an alpha leader limits the decision making to the thoughts of one individual and doesn't generally listen to others. I thinks alpha males often display extreme pride, which is based off inner insecurity and a need to prove themselves to be superior.

    I think it's often assumed that women are attracted to alpha men in preference to being attracted to other men, but I'm not sure the evidence supports this. I suspect this is more because the alpha man brags about his conquests and displays his women as trophies with him in public settings. To me these behaviours indicate insecurity not success.

    The man laughing at the alpha male is also displaying weakness in my view. The truly strong man isn't even there in this scenario, because he's doing something of greater value with his time, whether that is more genuine socialising, listening to others, voluntary work or studying or research, so he is contributing to society or becoming able to contribute better in the future.

    This debate is originally about the pecking order among males showing off in a bar. Women don't show off in such ways in a bar group of women. An alpha female will own expensive accessories such as handbags or shoes, and maybe have the perfect body or brag about her new boyfriend. Again she is trying to show that her life is perfect, and again the inner insecurity is covered by pride.

    By contrast the truly confident woman doesn't need to prove her worth using accessories, externals or her alpha male type boyfriend. She is listening properly to her friend who needs to unload grief or anxiety, she is quietly paying for the drinks of those she knows struggle to afford to buy their own and she is paying gentle and true compliments to the insecure females.

    It goes without saying that a truly confident man or woman doesn't need to prove their worth through sex; the alpha types are more likely to be promiscuous, in my view.
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  2. #132
    failed poetry slam career chubber's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rambling View Post
    I think the status of alpha weakens society, because an alpha leader limits the decision making to the thoughts of one individual and doesn't generally listen to others. I thinks alpha males often display extreme pride, which is based off inner insecurity and a need to prove themselves to be superior.

    I think it's often assumed that women are attracted to alpha men in preference to being attracted to other men, but I'm not sure the evidence supports this. I suspect this is more because the alpha man brags about his conquests and displays his women as trophies with him in public settings. To me these behaviours indicate insecurity not success.

    The man laughing at the alpha male is also displaying weakness in my view. The truly strong man isn't even there in this scenario, because he's doing something of greater value with his time, whether that is more genuine socialising, listening to others, voluntary work or studying or research, so he is contributing to society or becoming able to contribute better in the future.

    This debate is originally about the pecking order among males showing off in a bar. Women don't show off in such ways in a bar group of women. An alpha female will own expensive accessories such as handbags or shoes, and maybe have the perfect body or brag about her new boyfriend. Again she is trying to show that her life is perfect, and again the inner insecurity is covered by pride.

    By contrast the truly confident woman doesn't need to prove her worth using accessories, externals or her alpha male type boyfriend. She is listening properly to her friend who needs to unload grief or anxiety, she is quietly paying for the drinks of those she knows struggle to afford to buy their own and she is paying gentle and true compliments to the insecure females.

    It goes without saying that a truly confident man or woman doesn't need to prove their worth through sex; the alpha types are more likely to be promiscuous, in my view.
    It seems the definition of Alpha male is too unclear and requires context to indicate which one we are really talking about. I think the description you used in this particular context is correct. However what you are describing as "truly confident women/men" could also be described as healthy mature women and men. I'm not sure if that is really Alpha (although if Alphas are healthy parents, perhaps parents can be healthy mature men and women)

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  3. #133
    Senior Member Rambling's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chubber View Post
    It seems the definition of Alpha male is too unclear and requires context to indicate which one we are really talking about. I think the description you used in this particular context is correct. However what you are describing as "truly confident women/men" could also be described as healthy mature women and men. I'm not sure if that is really Alpha (although if Alphas are healthy parents, perhaps parents can be healthy mature men and women)

    I was trying to avoid making a *value* judgement...To label one behaviour as more emotionally mature than another smacks of self righteousness...another person who is nowhere near an alpha might have some other emotionally immature areas in their life.

    But I tend to think to try to *become* an Alpha is an undesirable aspiration in and of itself, because the described behaviour is so external and shallow...
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  4. #134
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    The strongest man does not heed the words or desires or others, he does not react to intimidation, he follows no rules but his own, he has no ego. Anything less and he risks being controlled.

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