dude, it's not that complicated. you got spiritually attacked because you told God you didn't need his help. saying that opened a door for the enemy to attack you. we always need God's help. pride (i.e. leaning on your own strength & understanding) is one of the biggest things we can do to offend God. read john 15. i really doubt God left you. he doesn't take a hike just because we make a mistake. we all make mistakes. he is a God of grace but that doesn't mean he doesn't discipline us or even allow the natural consequences of our actions to affect us. he allowed you to get spiritually attacked because that is what happens when we do something to give the enemy an opening/foothold into our lives.
who knows maybe he allowed this experience because he wants you to learn more about the spiritual realm. if you want to read a good book check out christianity with power: your worldview and your experience of the supernatural by charles kraft. when kraft, a seminary prof, was in africa as a missionary he found that the africans would start following jesus but then go back to their witchdoctors because the christians didn't have any remedy or power to deal with their illnesses or the evil spirits they were being attacked by. so, kraft started on a slow journey of being an intellectual learning about the spiritual realm and how that works in the christian faith. when he started practicing what goes on in the gospels the africans no longer had to turn to the witchdoctors for help because they now saw people get healed of diseases and freed from evil spirits. if you want something a bit simpler try power evangelism by john wimber who headed up the vineyard churches.
personally, i wouldn't expect on this particular forum (philosophy & spirituality), let alone this site, to get much good advice on anything related to the christian walk. seriously.