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  1. #1

    Default How to like oneself?

    How do you learn to like yourself?

    Thoughts?

    Practical advice?

    Accept the past. Live for the present. Look forward to the future.
    Robot Fusion
    "As our island of knowledge grows, so does the shore of our ignorance." John Wheeler
    "[A] scientist looking at nonscientific problems is just as dumb as the next guy." Richard Feynman
    "[P]etabytes of [] data is not the same thing as understanding emergent mechanisms and structures." Jim Crutchfield

  2. #2
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    2 great self-mastery quotes that I live by:

    "Unless you make yourself equal to God, you cannot understand God: for the like is not intelligible save to the like. Make yourself grow to a greatness beyond measure, by a bound free yourself from the body; raise yourself above all time, become Eternity; then you will understand God. Believe that nothing is impossible for you, think yourself immortal and capable of understanding all, all arts, all sciences, the nature of every living being. Mount higher than the highest height; descend lower than the lowest depth. Draw into yourself all sensations of everything created, fire and water, dry and moist, imagining that you are everywhere, on earth, in the sea, in the sky, that you are not yet born, in the maternal womb, adolescent, old, dead, beyond death. If you embrace in your thought all things at once, times, places, substances, qualities, quantities, you may understand God." - Giordano Bruno

    and...
    "The will is a world architect and composer, the will is a world power and mover. The world is shaped in the image of our wills and by the power of our wills. Will has essentially the nature of a force. Like all forces, will has a magnitude and a direction, and just like things move in the direction of the strongest force, things move in the direction of the strongest will. Whenever you loose something, you faced a greater will and were overpowered by it. If you want something to happen strongly enough, if the world wants something to happen strongly enough, then it is going to happen. The will is a creator. Will is a living organism, it grows and develops along with the individual. Weak individuals are characterized by a weak will or lack of will. Ill people are known by an ill will or a destructive will. Hence the presence and development of will is absolutely essential for personal and spiritual ascension. The key to the higher and diviner life is a strong and healthy will, a will to improve, a will to exceed, a will to life, but most importantly a will to ascend. The seed transforms into a flower by a will to ascend in the instrument. The will to ascend is an elevator to the higher levels of being, a key to unlock the higher potentials of life and a power to manifest them. I do want to climb a high mountain today!" - Friedrich Nietzsche

  3. #3
    Nips away your dignity Fluffywolf's Avatar
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    I am sometimes having a struggle on this spectrum as well. Although my question would be

    "How to not love yourself so much that it is blinding."

    Expectations and acceptance. I am pretty sure that is the crux of the matter.
    ~Self-depricating Megalomaniacal Superwolf

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    Wake, See, Sing, Dance Cellmold's Avatar
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    In my case, delusion.

    I'm serious. I can like myself in those brief moments when I am able to suppress any nagging thoughts or doubts about what I have or will do.

    When I can forget myself and become somebody else for a short while. In those few social groups I am comfortable, this is most evident.

    The rest of the time is back on track and remembering what I really am.
    'One of (Lucas) Cranach's masterpieces, discussed by (Joseph) Koerner, is in it's self-referentiality the perfect expression of left-hemisphere emptiness and a precursor of post-modernism. There is no longer anything to point to beyond, nothing Other, so it points pointlessly to itself.' - Iain McGilChrist

    Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
    "Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
    Piglet was comforted by this.
    - A.A. Milne.

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    Oooh that is a tough one. I'd have to say things that I have seen working include...

    Patience
    Honesty about who you are, about the impacts you have in the world (good and bad)
    Doing something or engaging in something that you consider worthwhile
    Not over-thinking it
    Your kisses, sweeter than honey. But guess what, so is my money.

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    Quote Originally Posted by gromit View Post
    Honesty about who you are, about the impacts you have in the world (good and bad)


    I couldn't agree more.

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    Quote Originally Posted by gromit View Post
    Oooh that is a tough one. I'd have to say things that I have seen working include...

    Patience
    Honesty about who you are, about the impacts you have in the world (good and bad)
    Doing something or engaging in something that you consider worthwhile
    Not over-thinking it
    In the long run, there's not really any inherent reason to like yourself or not. Plenty of people have plenty of reasons to like themselves, and yet don't, somehow. I think it has to do with how content you are with your life, do you compare yourself to some imaginary ideal too much? Do you focus only on negatives instead of seeing bad in perspective with good. How much do you feel you are actually able to shape things instead of being a helpless bystander in your own existence? That sort of thing.
    Your kisses, sweeter than honey. But guess what, so is my money.

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    Nips away your dignity Fluffywolf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AffirmitiveAnxiety View Post
    In my case, delusion.
    If it makes you truely happy, is it really a delusion? And what makes you think that the times you hate yourself isn't the delusion?
    ~Self-depricating Megalomaniacal Superwolf

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by ygolo View Post
    How do you learn to like yourself?
    Thoughts?

    Practical advice?
    I think that this is something that everyone struggles with to a certain extent in their life - either as an ongoing process or as moments in time where it's harder to like yourself than others.

    I think a lot of modern society today is one giant distraction fest from confronting this issue within ourselves. There is a great deal of comparing done between people and a holding up of a select few to be some unobtainable ideal form of humanity that we should be and yet aren't and can never be because it doesn't actually exist. No one is able to be alone with themselves anymore because we are bombarded with a cacophony of external things clamoring for our attention and money and pieces of ourselves.

    So how to deal with all this? I think it takes patience and forgiveness and acceptance on a level that doesn't always come naturally to us. And more than a pinch of courage to start the process and even more to continue it.

    Practical advice? Hmm. Do you like books? If so I would recommend picking up a copy of this somehow. Otherwise reading this free ebook can help as well.

    Essentially I think we have to start from a place of self-acceptance and to not judge who we are. If there are things we want to change then we have to assess how practical and realistic that kind of a change is. On some things just simply being aware of these faults may be enough. And on other things a process of change may be in order.

    Overall it is not easy or quick to do something like this. If it was then everyone would be genuinely happy.


  10. #10
    Wake, See, Sing, Dance Cellmold's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fluffywolf View Post
    If it makes you truely happy, is it really a delusion? And what makes you think that the times you hate yourself isn't the delusion?
    Because my self hate is built upon factual actions I have taken. My like is built upon only whims.

    Well I say factual...for this reality at least.
    'One of (Lucas) Cranach's masterpieces, discussed by (Joseph) Koerner, is in it's self-referentiality the perfect expression of left-hemisphere emptiness and a precursor of post-modernism. There is no longer anything to point to beyond, nothing Other, so it points pointlessly to itself.' - Iain McGilChrist

    Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
    "Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
    Piglet was comforted by this.
    - A.A. Milne.

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