How do you determine your self worth?

[Pinker85]

Meh. I have difficulty with this. Strong-willed and egotistical . . . I tend towards being highly competitive. I look for challenges. I look for things to fight against and conquer . . . there's a lot of fucked up power dynamics. My self worth is fragile because there's always someone out there that can beat me . . . at everything. I'm good at a lot of things (I'm not sure if this is a fucken curse) . . . but good never is enough . . . and I never feel I am good enough. I can make people around me feel like shit, rather unintentionally, because it takes A LOT for me to feel appreciative of someone's efforts. I try to be nice . . . but it isn't my nature to say shit I don't mean. I make myself miserable by never feeling anything is good enough. Probably has to do with being pretty heavily abused physically and psychologically as a kid . . . and being an orphan . . . which just probably on some level always makes a person question why they were tossed. Holy fucken balls, I read threads like this . . . and man, I'm a god damn asshole.

But ugh, I think other people are probably just as attached to not dying and not being in pain . . . and I think most humans are fucken clueless. And life is shitty you know . . . if someone gives me shitty service at a restaurant, I tend to still tip pretty well, like benefit of the doubt thing . . . maybe they are having a bad week or year or fucken life. I don't want to make people's lives shittier . . . you know straw breaking the camels back type BS. I try to laugh off most crappy situations and I partly think I do that to make the situation less shitty. So maybe that is another way with regard to other humans where I try to maintain this to have self worth. I also am pretty honest in my dealings with others and I don't ever gossip . . . using the general rule that if it would have to be said in hushed whisper if the other person was around, I don't want anything to do with it. But I can justify a lot of shit . . . so I do some fucked up crap. I don't know. Sure as fuck am not an outlandishly nice person. I'm working on that.

 

[Evo]

My self worth is determined by my ability to succeed with my functions.

Achieving goals of Se and Ti is easy. Achieving goals of Fe and Ni through Se and Ti is even more rewarding.

I find that if I can make myself the most well rounded best person I can possibly be, my self worth increases. My self esteem rises.

Just imagine an ESTP going to a book club, and not being awkward.

Success.

This is really good. I feel like if I'm aligning with the desires and goals of each individual function, especially Fi for me, I feel more whole and fulfilled, and definately have more self confidence. But I don't think behaviors and beliefs are going to accumulate to self worth. Then that would mean that people that steal or people that are alcoholics are "a lesser person" then me, as if their value is decreased because they make mistakes....and I Don't believe that. I think their value still remains that same as anyones.

 

[Mole]

Mole said, "You have called me a 'loser'. How soon you forget. Fortunately Australians love losers, just as Americans hate them."

If I did, I am truly sorry. I have intended to be kind to you on this forum and I don't usually make a habit of calling people I'm attempting to befriend a loser. Still, I might have done it. I'm not perfect and anything's possible. I would like for you to provide me a link to the post in which I called you a loser, if you don't mind. Again, I am sorry.

Having said that, I feel that there are some things that need to be spoken and clarified. First, this is not a knee-jerk reaction, nor is it an emotional response. I've actually sat here and carefully considered the things that I'm about to say to you and I am certain that they need to be said, if for no other reason than to let you know exactly where I stand. There is no anger or malice intended in the things I'm about to ask you. They are just questions that I want to know the answers to.

First, I thank you for all of the times you have commented on my posts. Sometimes, I questioned your motives, but still, I appreciated the time you put into speaking with me. Now having said that, I feel I would be doing you an injustice if I didn't say the following things to you.

Are you aware that you come across as being a nit-picky person who seems like he's/she's just trying to provoke people?

Are you aware that many people would like to like you if you would let them?

Do you realize that you seem cold and prickly and self-righteous?

Do you intentionally prod people in an effort to provoke them into giving you some kind of worked-up response?

If so, why?

Are you aware that you come across as lonely and bitter?

Do you intend to sound prejudice and judgmental?

Also, am I mistaken to think that you profess scientific intellect? If not, then does it really seem logical to get on a forum with people from all over the world and criticize those whose culture is different from yours?

On that same note, why would a person so against typology be involved in a forum dedicated to the subject?

See, from where I'm standing, it looks like this. It doesn't seem logical to get on a forum dedicated to typology and consistently criticize it, unless you intend to set us all straight on the heresy of psychology, then you come across as self-righteous and narrow-minded. So, which is it? Are you being illogical? Or do you deem yourself our savior from scientific fallacies?

Did you know that it appears that you freely point your fingers of criticism and prejudice at others to avoid facing the truth that there is something missing in your life?

Okay, I think that's most of my questions. Again, I apologize if I called you a loser. And I hope you can provide me with a concrete example.

I'm inner directed; I am not outer directed. I am not dependent on how others see me.

I am able to supend my disbelief at will. And I am able to return to disbelief at will.

 

[roman67]

Success is totally depending upon your satisfaction and hunger of achievements.

 

[Evo]

Success is totally depending upon your satisfaction and hunger of achievements.

Yes, but does your self worth depend on success?

 

[Lady_X]

wait...why would anyone to do that? i mean what's the point? and who needs to know? value in what sense? to who?

 

[Siúil a Rúin]

Philosophically I think self worth is intrinsic.

I increase my feeling of self-worth by being accepting of others with their flaws and by appreciating and being able to perceive the beauty in the world.

 

[Halla74]

Philosophically I think self worth is intrinsic.

I increase my feeling of self-worth by being accepting of others with their flaws and by appreciating and being able to perceive the beauty in the world.

Rock on; nicely stated.



-Halla74

 

[wolfy]

I feel like self worth depends on the ability to add value. I don't feel like a person intrinsically has self worth, unless they are benign in nature. Then I would agree.

Your own estimation of your self worth makes up your self esteem. Self esteem is judged by how much you are living up to your self ideal. These can be out of whack.

Perceptions are tricky business.

 

[EcK]

I auction it.
Highest bid wins.

 

[Lexicon]

I auction it.
Highest bid wins.

*starts the bidding with old pennies, cat fur & pocket lint*

 

[EcK]

*starts the bidding with old pennies, cat fur & pocket lint*

I shall the wealthiest of all the cat ladies in the land!

 

[Evo]

Philosophically I think self worth is intrinsic.

I increase my feeling of self-worth by being accepting of others with their flaws and by appreciating and being able to perceive the beauty in the world.

Yes! And worded nicely!

 

[EJCC]

Bump

 

[Magic Poriferan]

I guess it's based primarily on making people I admire happy or impressed.

 

[Yara the Corpse]

by whatever is convenient at the time?

 

[magpie]

By lowering the standards I hold others to. Otherwise I have to force myself to live up to my own impossible standards to avoid being hypocritical. When that doesn't happen, I feel like a bad worthless person (and I likely am for judging people based off such high expectations in the first place).

 

[Cellmold]

I look at what I do, if what I do isn't what I wish I did, then I remember to make sure I get it done the way I'd wished. Usually this is to do with how I deal with people.

It's about balancing the internal and the external. I feel validated and vindicated when I act towards what I want to see in the world. And I blanche and diminish when I betray it.

All the ethics and morals, harm & healing are fickle (like the world they are part of) and rely upon trust. But trust is implicit and can't be bought, only earned and that includes trusting myself.

 

[Pionart]

Write down your full name on a piece of paper, followed by your date of birth.

Assign to each letter of your name the value corresponding to its place in the alphabet and add these numbers up. Also add up the numbers of your birthdate, and multiply the two numbers together.

Proceed to scrunch of the piece of paper and go out and enjoy yourself!

edit:hmm..

 

[EJCC]

By lowering the standards I hold others to. Otherwise I have to force myself to live up to my own impossible standards to avoid being hypocritical. When that doesn't happen, I feel like a bad worthless person (and I likely am for judging people based off such high expectations in the first place).

What are your current standards for others?