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  1. #1
    Senior Member swordpath's Avatar
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    Default How often do you experience an "existential breakdown?"

    Do you have a strong, positive outlook on life and feel secure, in that you're here and existing for a reason, that life has meaning and that you hold a purpose? How often do you question your stable and secure mentality (assuming you have one)? How do you deal with the doubts when they arise?

    I want to see how it varies from person to person.

  2. #2
    heart on fire
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    Last existential breakdown was at age six. I used to get into these moods where I would wonder what it would feel like if I had never existed and what and where was I before I became human. I would wonder how could I exist so strongly now and yet not exist before and it just didn't seem possible. I would wonder where would the energy that was ME go that moment when I close my eyes for the last time and cease to be alive.

    I would really get into a horrible funk over it all, couldn't sleep, eating very little...but luckily had INTJ dad to discuss the issue with, he took me seriously and didn't roll his eyes like everyone else did when I would ask these questions. He would start discussing the nature of infinity and such in terms that I could understand and ask me leading questions to challenge my mind to embrace the idea of concepts that I could only catch wisps of.

    He also teach me the value of keeping an open mind, that whatever comes at the next stop, I cannot be sure now of what form it will take because we don't have that kind of knowing for certain but I can hold myself confident that I can hold myself ready to face it.

    I feel from my own Fi that the core of me, will be me always. I can trust in my own existence. All else is someone else's reality and cannot be mine. Float free and have no expectations, no need for solid assurances, trust in the processes and cycles of life.

  3. #3
    Senior Member swordpath's Avatar
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    6? Christ, so something's wrong if I think about this everyday?

  4. #4
    mrs disregard's Avatar
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    Does anyone want to brief me on what existentialism is? Simple terms?

    /

  5. #5
    Senior Member swordpath's Avatar
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    Pretty much what it sounds like.

    Existence, as a free being. A breakdown would be questioning/doubting existence or the purpose of it.

    Check wikipedia for a more in-depth look.

  6. #6
    Senior Member swordpath's Avatar
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    Like, really do people just not think about this? Do most people choose to believe in something that comforts them (God/afterlife) and then shun the prospect of anything different?

  7. #7
    heart on fire
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beat View Post
    Like, really do people just not think about this? Do most people choose to believe in something that comforts them (God/afterlife) and then shun the prospect of anything different?
    I think that if you develop your Fi deeper, which is probably where this is all coming from at this time for you, then you will become more and more comfortable with the uncertainity and feel more sure of your ability to face it. jmo. It is more about being comfortable with keeping open outlook, open view than closing down on a certain belief, but that's just my take on it.

  8. #8
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Pretty much (and I am not kidding, really), my entire life up until last year was an existential breakdown. Some times were worse than others, but usually at some level I was struggling to maintain a sense of purpose in the world.

    Since I was brought up with a Christian background, that often was the form of "net" that caught me so I wouldn't fall into the void. But I remember sometime when I was around 32 I had one very large plummet that I eventually climbed out of. The second was the last five years or so of my life, culminating last year when I really felt like God was dead and I had nothing left to stand on.

    For me, it was basically a shift towards intellectual integrity. Religions often try to give believers "assurance" that what they believe is correct, and finally I had to admit that there was no proof intellectually or otherwise that ensured my belief was correct -- and my experiences had finally failed me as well. Basically I made a shift in my view of the world, where I no longer demanded a particular amount of evidence. I became more agnostic in my intellectual approach, and any belief I had in God I could easily and finally say "I don't have proof for it, nor do I need it," and I don't see the need to debate it with someone. It's a personal thing.

    But it was very very bad, until last August when things stared to improve. It contributed greatly to my suicidal ideation and sense of pointlessness. If people demand a "reason" to exist, I think there's no reason that ever seems good enough. The desire to live seems like it has to be more instinctive than that: You want to live because you want to live and life is good even if it's painful.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  9. #9
    Senior Member swordpath's Avatar
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    ^"Because life is good even if it's painful"

    What about when it's not good? We strive to make changes and fulfill what's empty. Then you question, why even do that? What happens when things go wrong again, or when it's not enough? What do you live for? Is it the next pleasant moment/period of life?

    I have a rather good life. I have an amazing family. There's nothing inherently wrong with me. But I often look at people that have it so much worse than I do and I have to wonder how they make it through. Where does their motivation stem from? Can people really just live life without even feeling a need to question their existence?

    I'm just stimulating discussion. I'm not freaking out really, if it appears that way. hah

  10. #10
    Senior Member swordpath's Avatar
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    I don't want to get off topic but heart made a comment about developing Fi. How do you develop something like that? Isn't that the kind of thing that you either have or you don't?

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