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  1. #1
    Senior Member swordpath's Avatar
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    Default Biblical marriage




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    I dont want to marry a bible, I'd prefer to marry a woman.

  3. #3
    morose bourgeoisie
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    I didn't know the bible provided so many choices!




    (But no man+man or woman+woman. That would be a sin)

  4. #4
    Senior Member swordpath's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lark View Post
    I dont want to marry a bible, I'd prefer to marry a woman.
    Heathen.

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    Senior Member UniqueMixture's Avatar
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    You're forgetting Israel + tamar (his dead son's wife) although that was more of a hookup. Absalom + his sister. And Hosea being "commanded by God" to marry a prostitute.

    Oh yeah, Abraham + his half-sister Sarah
    For all that we have done, as a civilization, as individuals, the universe is not stable, and nor is any single thing within it. Stars consume themselves, the universe itself rushes apart, and we ourselves are composed of matter in constant flux. Colonies of cells in temporary alliance, replicating and decaying and housed within, an incandescent cloud of electrical impulses. This is reality, this is self knowledge, and the perception of it will, of course, make you dizzy.

  6. #6
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by swordpath View Post
    Heathen.
    he's not a bibliophile like some of us!

    Quote Originally Posted by nebbykoo View Post
    (But no man+man or woman+woman. That would be a sin)
    What's amusing is that I think the prohibitions about homosexuality only specifically refer to men. I can't quite remember this sec, but I don't think there is a place in the bible that says a women shall not sleep with a woman. I think this was because the "magic" was in the man's seed, and he was supposed to ejaculate into a woman's womb; to do elsewhere defiled the sex act.

    Quote Originally Posted by uniquemixture
    You're forgetting Israel + tamar (his dead son's wife) although that was more of a hookup.
    Actually, I'm pretty sure that was Judah, not Israel. God killed Tamar's husband because he was a bad man; Onan then married her, due to the Law that he had to produce an heir for his dead brother, but he pulled out and spilled his seed on the ground, so God struck him dead too; Judah wouldn't let his last son marry Tamar because he didn't want HIM to die, but Tamar wanted a baby to honor her first husband, so she disguised herself as a hooker and got Judah to knock her up; after she was visibly pregnant, Judah said to stone her because she had been sleeping around, but then she pulled out the items she had stolen from Judah when they had been doing the deed, and Judah realized that the gig was up on him if he offed her, so he spared her. So Tamar finally got the babies she had been promised, and still descended from the same lineage.

    Anyway... quite an admirable display of moral marriage, Bible style. The Bible's kind of a cool book; it makes no excuses for these people, it just describes them in all of their failings.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  7. #7
    Senior Member swordpath's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    What's amusing is that I think the prohibitions about homosexuality only specifically refer to men. I can't quite remember this sec, but I don't think there is a place in the bible that says a women shall not sleep with a woman.
    It's a trade off. Man can't sleep with other men (if that's what they like), but women have to marry their rapists.

  8. #8
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by swordpath View Post
    It's a trade off. Man can't sleep with other men (if that's what they like), but women have to marry their rapists.
    I guess I would just have to hope he had just been having a bad day.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  9. #9
    Senior Member KDude's Avatar
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    I don't care if the Bible disapproves or approves of same sex marriage. The fact that that it's a bronze age era document, from a patriarchal culture in a land without any air conditioning is bad enough. Are there other bronze age era patriarchal cultures you'd want to base your love life on? Yeah, I didn't think so.

    If this is all hinting at gay marriage, it's best to address that situation for what it is.

    edit: Oh, and by their standards, I and every male who ever lived, and their dogs, cats, and every other creature under the sun is going to burn in hell for "onanism". Whether we jerked off or had wet dreams (either is inevitable), it's the Lake of Fire for us. And if you think can be free of this sin, then you will go to another section of hell for false testimony.

  10. #10
    Senior Member Pseudo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by UniqueMixture View Post
    You're forgetting Israel + tamar (his dead son's wife) although that was more of a hookup. Absalom + his sister. And Hosea being "commanded by God" to marry a prostitute.

    Oh yeah, Abraham + his half-sister Sarah
    To be fair the first two are examples of people doing the wrong thing by giving in to passions and in the third god is trying to use the example of hosea and gomer to illustrate his faithfulness to Israel despite their frequent bouts of idol worship. None are supposed to be examples of an ideal marriage in bible standards.

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