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  1. #1
    Luctor et emergo Ezra's Avatar
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    Default Why is love not high up on my agenda?

    I dunno why, but romantic relationships simply aren't important to me. I don't feel deficient in any way; I'm just interested to know the cause, and whether anyone else feels like this (and maybe if it's type related too).

  2. #2
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ezra View Post
    I dunno why, but romantic relationships simply aren't important to me. I don't feel deficient in any way; I'm just interested to know the cause, and whether anyone else feels like this (and maybe if it's type related too).
    1. Some philosophies put forth the idea that after mentally developing to a certain point, the beauty of knowledge/wisdom as a whole becomes more important to you than the beauty of an individual, physical human being (which is the basis for romantic relationships). That could be what you're experiencing.

    2. Not everyone has the same level of need for passion and romance in their lives. It might just not be a strong need/priority for you as an individual (especially with inferior Fi). You probably know what you need, and what you don't need at this point in your life.

    3. You may be dealing with something else in your life right now that doesn't permit you to feel comfortable focusing on such things.

    4. You might have an unconscious aversion to such relationships due to a bad past experience that you believed you'd gotten over.

    5. You may be putting most of your resources towards achieving a particular goal, and thus not considering anything that doesn't work towards that goal in your agenda.

  3. #3
    Courage is immortality Valiant's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Athenian200 View Post
    2. Not everyone has the same level of need for passion and romance in their lives. It might just not be a strong need/priority for you as an individual (especially with inferior Fi). You probably know what you need, and what you don't need at this point in your life.

    3. You may be dealing with something else in your life right now that doesn't permit you to feel comfortable focusing on such things.

    4. You might have an unconscious aversion to such relationships due to a bad past experience that you believed you'd gotten over.
    I guess these arguments holds the most water. At least for me, as an ENTJ.
    There have been fairly long periods of time in my life in wich i've been almost completely without interest for anything else than brief sexual contact.
    There might be another factor here, too. I've found that I analyze 99.9% of all people and deem them unfit for friendship and 99.999% are unfit/incompatible for seriously meant relationships.
    Right now I have managed to fint that 0.001% and i actually have a girlfriend and a couple of really good friends, but just a couple of years ago I had neither.

    Mightier than the tread of marching armies is the power of an idea whose time has come

  4. #4
    pathwise dependent FDG's Avatar
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    Because you haven't found a girl that has made you fall in love.
    ENTj 7-3-8 sx/sp

  5. #5
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    You're young?
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  6. #6
    Member skip's Avatar
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    Young is my guess, too. Aren't ENTJs are more interested in being little generals to others instead of loving them, anyway?

  7. #7
    pathwise dependent FDG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skip View Post
    Young is my guess, too. Aren't ENTJs are more interested in being little generals to others instead of loving them, anyway?
    You forgot about sadism and rape.
    ENTj 7-3-8 sx/sp

  8. #8
    Senior Member swordpath's Avatar
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    I believe it can be cyclic. You may go through periods of loneliness and desire for a companion and then at other periods of life, not feel you want/need it. What determines how those cycles shift, I dunno.

  9. #9
    Senior Member swordpath's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skip View Post
    Aren't ENTJs are more interested in being little generals to others instead of loving them, anyway?
    That is love isn't it?

  10. #10
    Senior Member wedekit's Avatar
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    Well, I would think of this as a good mindset. A lot of people search for love and never find it because they are searching for things that are just too far out of reach. You might end up being one of those lucky people that has love fall into their unsuspecting lap one day. Just because it isn't on your agenda doesn't mean it wont happen. (If that was the case I would rearrange my agenda. ) If you don't consider love a priority then you will be less likely to have expectations that are too high for your partner when (or if) you find them.

    Basically what I'm saying is think of all the positive things too.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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