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  1. #1
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    Default Sick of everything.

    I'm sick of everything going on in my life, i can't find happiness in anything i feel like just ending it all one day.

    I hate my personality, i hate being childish and goofy and making myself an easy target. I hate being 5'5 so basically a midget compared to everyone else. I just want to end it one of these days. Why can't i be happy?

  2. #2
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    You can be happy, but you're not going to be if life feels like an unbearable burden. It doesn't have to though. Can you seek out professional help? I think you should do so as soon as possible, especially if you're having suicidal thoughts.

    Bucking the social pressure regarding the stigma of being short isn't an easy thing to do when you're down but people who judge you for it are probably not worth knowing. Don't beat yourself up over it, being short isn't a crime. As for your personality, those all sound like endearing qualities to me.

    At any rate, being picked on is not your fault; no one should do that regardless of what someone's personality is like. And whatever it is, I'll bet that you're a better, nicer, and more charming person than your depression allows you to give yourself credit for.

    I've been in your shoes several times. For all those times except my most recent spell, I decided to ride out the misery alone. It sucked. So when it came back this time, I decided that I didn't want to struggle through it alone, especially when I had ready help at hand if only I bothered to seek it out.

    It can get better, but you need to muster up enough appreciation for yourself to seek out opportunities to make it better. Good dietary habits, regular sleeping patterns, exercise, venturing out into the sunlight, and being social all help a lot. Doing them on a sustained basis does require a certain amount of willpower, which can be difficult to muster but isn't impossible. I didn't think I could, so given all that, going to see a counselor was actually comparatively easy.

    Oh, also, don't tell yourself nothing will work from the get go even if it feels like that. All these things can and do help most people tremendously. And even if you feel alone in this, you're not.

  3. #3
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    We all have times in our lives where we feel as though nothing is of any worth, but it's important to remember that things can always be better; that in the future things can turn out for the better. But of course, as senza mentioned, riding out that misery alone is unhelpful; talk with your friends or family about this matter, they'll help you through this difficult time in our life.

  4. #4
    Senior Member KDude's Avatar
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    Everytime you think it's lame to be 5'5", just remember me, a taller person who goes through life smacking his head on chandliers. Believe me, it's overrated.

    And despite my size, I'm probably goofier than you. In fact, the taller you get, the more clumsy as well.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    I'm 5"4.5 .. I have an inner child that enjoys running rampant at times .. I don't care about what people perceive my personality to be .. I like that i am quirky. I'm me and there is only one Saslou

    Instead at looking at all your faults, why not try looking at what you have going for you.

    You have access to the internet so the world is your oyster.
    If you were to be in hospital, could you call someone to be with you?
    Are your cupboards full of food and your basic needs being met?
    Do you have a roof over your head tonight?

    You are in a better situation than a lot of people in the world.

    Happiness is a perception .. It's up to the individual to perceive their cup half full or half empty.

    I am not sure how old you are but i can almost promise you that life is going to kick the shit out of you .. Are you going to rise to the challenge or admit defeat? We have to dust ourselves down and get back on the horse, the other option is rather sad.

    This too shall pass .. If it's that bad, seek professional help. From someone who's seen a shrink, they are really helpful.

    Apologies if this has come across as rather blunt .. It's written with good intentions.
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  6. #6
    Intergalactic Badass mujigay's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Illmatic View Post
    I'm sick of everything going on in my life, i can't find happiness in anything i feel like just ending it all one day.

    I hate my personality, i hate being childish and goofy and making myself an easy target. I hate being 5'5 so basically a midget compared to everyone else. I just want to end it one of these days. Why can't i be happy?
    Every time you feel bad about being 5'5", stop, think of me, and have a good laugh. I'm 4'10".

    On a more helpful note, what kind of work/school schedule are you on? If it's something that's wearing you down, think of the ways that you can change it to make your life better. Have a better sleep routine, try eating more healthy foods that you enjoy, watch your body. Sometimes your physical well-being can have a very strong effect on your mental well-being.

    Also, things that you are percieving as your faults may actually be your assets. Childish and goofy? To a lot of people out there, that's called being young at heart, and lively.
    1w9 sx/sp
    A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants.

    All that is gold does not glitter
    Not all those who wander are lost

  7. #7
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    Are you a guy? Cause i'm a guy.

    I feel like it's no use carrying on when all there is is disappointment. I'm 18 and i have not done much with my life and this is my last year at school and it's looking like i'm going be a big failure. I feel like i give a lot to my friends but i don't get enough back like if i'm gone it's nothing. Sick of not having what i want. 18 and i haven't ever kissed a girl, no trophy's to put on my wall, no pictures to look to as memories when your childhood is meant to be the best years of your life. Even the smallest of things like the way my family is, i dnt even know my fkn MBTI yet and i've been searching for like 6 months. It's like a never ending circle of pain.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Illmatic View Post
    I feel like it's no use carrying on when all there is is disappointment. I'm 18 and i have not done much with my life and this is my last year at school and it's looking like i'm going be a big failure. I feel like i give a lot to my friends but i don't get enough back like if i'm gone it's nothing. Sick of not having what i want. 18 and i haven't ever kissed a girl, no trophy's to put on my wall, no pictures to look to as memories when your childhood is meant to be the best years of your life. Even the smallest of things like the way my family is, i dnt even know my fkn MBTI yet and i've been searching for like 6 months. It's like a never ending circle of pain.
    Dude I felt the same exact way when I was 18; I finished high school happy only because it was theend of that hell-hole, I had few in the way of freinds or a potential future, I sucked at everything, and had little accomplished what my peers hadalready done. Hell I'm 22 as of now and not much has changed, well, I've never been kissed by a girl before still, but I things are still better for the most part. Just hang in there and be optimistic about the future, you'll get through your darker days.

    Also, almost everyone is unsure of their MBTI/JCF type throughout multiple times in their life, mostly due to the fact that typology of any sort is a very shitty way to categorize people.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Illmatic View Post
    Are you a guy? Cause i'm a guy.

    I feel like it's no use carrying on when all there is is disappointment. I'm 18 and i have not done much with my life and this is my last year at school and it's looking like i'm going be a big failure. I feel like i give a lot to my friends but i don't get enough back like if i'm gone it's nothing. Sick of not having what i want. 18 and i haven't ever kissed a girl, no trophy's to put on my wall, no pictures to look to as memories when your childhood is meant to be the best years of your life. Even the smallest of things like the way my family is, i dnt even know my fkn MBTI yet and i've been searching for like 6 months. It's like a never ending circle of pain.
    Can you masturbate? Masturbating releases endorphins and makes you happy. :>

  10. #10
    Senior Member uncommonentity's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Illmatic View Post
    I'm 18 and i have not done much with my life.
    #1 reason not to off yourself right there.
    Veni, Vidi, Cessi.

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