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  1. #1
    Senior Member uncommonentity's Avatar
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    Question What do you consider to be your inner demon?

    Would you say you have something that eats you from the inside?

    If so, are you avoidant of it for the bliss of ignorance or are you making logical steps towards defeating it?
    Veni, Vidi, Cessi.

  2. #2
    Ginkgo
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    Quote Originally Posted by uncommonentity View Post
    Would you say you have something that eats you from the inside?
    Yes.

    If so, are you avoidant of it for the bliss of ignorance or are you making logical steps towards defeating it?
    You "defeat" it by accepting it and learning from it. In almost all cases, you must relearn and relearn the same process as that inner-demon wells up again. It's only a demon if it possesses you or you interpret others as assuming its form. Hint hint. It's your interpretation. Your responsibility. Likely, it's something you'll wrestle with for the rest of your life.

    While I do have demons that are more apparent, the one I struggle with is a silent sort of sensitivity. I know how to seal it, doing so is easy, but realizing I must do so is difficult at times.

  3. #3
    Post Human Post Qlip's Avatar
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    I am Legion. I identify with all aspects of myself. I don't so much try to fight the problematic ones but instead balance, foster or subvert.

  4. #4
    lab rat extraordinaire CrystalViolet's Avatar
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    Hmm, I do have inner demons. I ran from them for a long time. I was forced to confront them a couple of years ago. I deal with them a day at a time now. I try to forgive myself, but again it's a daily proccess. Other people are much more forgiving and understanding, but I'm less so of myself.
    Currently submerged under an avalanche of books and paper work. I may come back up for air from time to time.
    Real life awaits and she is a demanding mistress.

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  5. #5
    ReflecTcelfeR
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    Demonizing comes from misunderstanding. I use all efforts to avoid miscommunication. I fight it. I conquer through knowing why and the beast is quieted, but never killed otherwise "I" would die, too.

    It doesn't like to be named. I've learnt that.

  6. #6
    likes this gromit's Avatar
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    My inner demon is a trash-talker and super negative/critical. I just have to keep trying to do positive things with my talents and develop them and have friendships and other relationships and count my blessings, do things that I find interesting and rewarding. And when something comes up that is difficult, see it as a challenge and an experience to learn.

    Having tangible things to point to or recall or to have something to show for really helps me.

    And sometimes I just have to say "OH SHUT UP" or almost make fun of it like "wahhhh life is so hard, everything is horrible I'm just gonna die now" and then, taking it to extreme like that, I realize that I am being a little bit ridiculous.

    In the past I would definitely believe those negative thoughts and had a hard time getting away from them, I still get in funks from time to time.
    Your kisses, sweeter than honey. But guess what, so is my money.

  7. #7
    Lay the coin on my tongue SilkRoad's Avatar
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    I think I have a few. The worst one is probably that when someone has hurt me, I have a certain dark desire to see them suffer. Certainly, the last thing I would do is wish them well.

    It can be like unforgiveness taken to an extreme. It's weird because for so many things I am very forgiving. I think it is partly an offended sense of justice, in a twisted way. I don't like it if someone hurt me and then things seem to go well for them.

    It can be reversed when I actually hear they're suffering, though. It's strange. For instance, I have to admit I was kind of...if not "glad", then "satisfied" when I heard my ex's marriage had broken up. It seemed kind of right...even though that's not a good impulse. More recently, though I have not seen him for years, I have heard that he seems depressed, and generally things are going quite badly for him. It was then that I felt a pang, and something like concern.

    I'm a Christian and forgiveness is an important part of my faith, so it really is a dark thing in me. I remind myself that we all make mistakes and that we are all in need of forgiveness, and you can't expect forgiveness if you don't extend it. It hasn't gone away, though.
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  8. #8
    nee andante bechimo's Avatar
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    Being controlled. If I don't trust you, good luck trying to have even a pinpoint of control over me. Either I will duke it out with you until you're dead or I'll drop you like a hot rock, if you try.

    I've accepted it as one of the base premises to my personality.

  9. #9
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    If I have an inner demon, it is most likely the sense that, somewhere way back, I should have made a different choice resulting in my life being significantly different from what it is today. It is easy to set this thought aside to carry on with daily activities, and it rarely becomes a preoccupation, but it continues to lurk at the edges of consciousness, and every now and then rears its head for attention. I try as time permits to address it by objectively considering the pros and cons of my real life, and the life I sometimes feel I should have. I also try to figure out why I feel drawn to something on the surface far less appealing. So far, however, I have made little headway.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...

  10. #10
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    Would you say you have something that eats you from the inside?
    Yes, not really something specific, more a mentality that I know is (hopefully) unjustifiable, but one which I guess I have a sort of sickly romantic relationship with. Of course why this is probably due to specific instances of my history, but I rather not open up that can of worms here.

    If so, are you avoidant of it for the bliss of ignorance or are you making logical steps towards defeating it?
    Both.
    Sometimes I purposefully put it out of my head in order to function simply because I know if I'm constantly carrying it around I am liable to do and say things that I will later regret .
    Other times those things need to be said.

    Personally, I don't look at it as if it is something that can be defeated...or rather the only way it can be defeated is by me not existing anymore. As someone said above, "I would die too..". I just try to understand it for what it is, move on, and surround myself with people who understand that not everyone is able to put up a fake wall of "everything is all right" all the time.

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