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Ask God

Joined
Jun 6, 2007
Messages
7,312
MBTI Type
INTJ
Dear FlatteringlyDerisive,

Wow, this was a lot to take in...

Well... Dear God,
As individuals, we may just happen. Not going into details, nobody is inherently better but may be highly valued in comparison to others. So, as I proceed about my life, what is your opinion for what I do? Would you despise me for intentionally harming others? It would happen whether or not I intend so.

This part is not true. Accidents happen, but you can exercise your free will to avoid intentionally harming others.

These inevitable events in life due to the various contributing factors that make my days are extremely complex. Do you favor anyone as good? I mean, you can't claim anyone evil except for the perceiver of evil (Christians... uh no pointing fingers).

I favor everyone as good. Everyone is born with the tools to be good. Some achieve it, some don't. But it wouldn't be very fair for me to brand someone as evil from the get go or not give them the opportunity to be good, would it?

The life I live is a paradox, and unfortunately (in a way), I was born in America. These people want me to shackle myself to their vague collection of instructions passed down from generations of retarded monkeys. Evolution wants to devour my soul. I wish to scientifically develop a way to seperate my conscious from my physical being by applying an extremely-effective electron stimulator to highly activate my neurological power, in which I will then re-stabilize my bioelectric structure. So my general question being, what are your opinions of me? Do you despise me, like me, respect me or fear me? Do you wish to mold me into delicious banana chips? What would the ultimately-ultimate answer be? ...

I love you, of course. I actually can't believe that people keep asking me that. It's the most basic thing about me. It's like asking Michael Jordan if he's good at basketball. As for your plan, I find your ideas intriguing and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.
 
Joined
Jun 6, 2007
Messages
7,312
MBTI Type
INTJ
Dear God, do you love us because we are crazy enough to worship you?

Dear Victor,

No, that's just a bonus. I love you because I made you, just like any parent loves their children. Plus, you guys invented waffles. I LOVE waffles.


Why do you ask us to -

but you can't even love a person who doesn't believe you enough to take him/her to heaven?

Dear God, aren't you a freaking hypocrite?

Dear Riva,

My answer to you here is sort of the same as my last answer. Where did you ever get the idea that I don't love you? Only those who reject me are excluded. And that's the way they seem to want it, from what I can gather.


Dear God,

Why didn't you answer Victor's question?

Dear Nerd Girl,

I was on vacation. The Orion Nebula is lovely this time of year.
 
Joined
Jun 6, 2007
Messages
7,312
MBTI Type
INTJ
Dear God

Why have you allowed hatred, greed and vanity to enter our souls?
Why have you allowed us to kill each other like there is no tomorrow?
Why is there so much sadness in the world?
How did your sons got to the point of questioning Your existence?

Dear Kraska,

All those things are human. Why would I have created you if I did not want to give you the opportunity to grow? To grow is to overcome obstacles, to succeed despite imperfection. As for questioning my existence, I hope all of you do. I gave you brains so that you would use them. I want you to accept me, but I want it to be your choice. How can you win the love of someone with a gun at their back?
 
Joined
Jun 6, 2007
Messages
7,312
MBTI Type
INTJ
Sorry guys, God is out to lunch:

out_to_lunch_answer_2_xlarge.jpeg

I'm baaaaaack! Did anything happen while I was gone?
 
Joined
Jun 6, 2007
Messages
7,312
MBTI Type
INTJ
So, God, why are you so particular about people capitalizing pronouns in reference to you? That sounds a little petty, don't you think.

Dear Chimerical,

I couldn't care less about that, frankly. Let me tell you a story. I knew a guy that worked in the entertainment industry, which as you may know is fraught with titanic egos. That guy told me that often, the crazy douchey requests made on behalf of actors and other big deals were actually the idea of their assistants, who thought that was their job. When made aware of what was requested on their behalf, lots of these people were embarrassed. Whenever anyone asks you to do something like capitalize pronouns for me, remember this story.

Also, if you created everything and you're this omnipotent all powerful being who knows everything then why are there people who do "bad" things? Wouldn't you know what they're going to do based on the environment you put them in and how you, personally, made them [down to every hair, their personality and everything]. So, given that, every crime committed would be YOUR fault. Since you made the criminal the way they were and knew they'd end up going down that path in life if they were in the situation they were born into.

Like hitler. You made an motivational man and set him up so he wouldn't get into art school and he'd be angry and kill a lot of jews. Why God?

Also, Do you like Chai?

It seems like I'm asked a variation of this question all the time. I have to let people do what they will do, or their lives are not their own. I can't just stop bullets or give everyone two loving parents or get hacks into art school. The test of character is what you do when everything is not going your way.

Yes, I like Chai very much, although I prefer coffee.
 
Joined
Jun 6, 2007
Messages
7,312
MBTI Type
INTJ
God, how do we kill you?

Dear Elisius,

You can't really kill me in the physical sense. I mean, I AM God. That said, you could make me pretty irrelevant. All you have to do is convince everyone else to reject me. If nobody wants to embrace my love, my hands are pretty much tied.

I'd miss you guys, but I could finally get around to cleaning out the garage.
 

Chimerical

Permabanned
Joined
Apr 30, 2008
Messages
898
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
1w5
Dear Chimerical,

I couldn't care less about that, frankly. Let me tell you a story. I knew a guy that worked in the entertainment industry, which as you may know is fraught with titanic egos. That guy told me that often, the crazy douchey requests made on behalf of actors and other big deals were actually the idea of their assistants, who thought that was their job. When made aware of what was requested on their behalf, lots of these people were embarrassed. Whenever anyone asks you to do something like capitalize pronouns for me, remember this story.



It seems like I'm asked a variation of this question all the time. I have to let people do what they will do, or their lives are not their own. I can't just stop bullets or give everyone two loving parents or get hacks into art school. The test of character is what you do when everything is not going your way.

Yes, I like Chai very much, although I prefer coffee.

After seeing how you dodge questions, I have to ask: Are you a politician cause you sure talk like one.

Now, back to this whole YOU created people the way they are and also created the environment they're in and being an all knowing [meaning you know EVERYTHING!!!!!. I repeat EVERYFUCKINGTHING]

irrelevant, you mentioned that you're often asked questions like this one [guess who doesn't care]. So, if you're often asked like questions, why don't you have an answer?

You say you can't just stop bullets... Speaking of which. The guy who created bullets was created by YOU. And you created him to be the way he was going to be and placed him in the environment and time he grew up in. Either you're and asshole allknowing being, or your power is limited and you're a weak being not worthy of being acknowledged as a god. If you're all knowing you would've known he'd be inspired in this environment and end up making a weapon that would cause so much destruction and death. So, why make someone who's going to be inspired to create such horrible things?

Hacks into art school?
Hacks...
Let's look at a graphic design aspect. Symbols. The point of a symbol many times is to be pleasing to the eye and memorable. Also highly recognizable. The most successful graphic designer I can think of created a symbol that appears to be moving making it more eye catching, intentionally made it easy for others to reproduce, and then selected a color scheme that also catches the eye.

Since this was easy to reproduce and it caught the eye so well, it became possibly the greatest marketing tool ever created. People see it and instantaneously know what it is and what it means.

This isn't something a Hack without talent would create. This is something someone with a talent for art would do. Also, the same person made himself into a mascot with the same principles. Easy to resemble and very recognizable. [Colonel sanders, I suspect stole the idea as well as many others afterwards]. again, considering the success rate this is clearly not a Hack doing these things. It's someone with talent in art.

This was Hitler making a swatiska and making himself a recognizable guy [that's easy to draw (seriously, that's fucking genius)].

So again, why would you make someone with that kind of drive, ambition, and talent and put them in a situation that would lead to them getting so angry and frustrated that they started the worst war this world has ever seen?

If you're gonna make an angry man for shits and giggles why make them with all these talents that can be used to do such horrible things? Are you really that bored?
 

Helios

Member
Joined
Dec 28, 2008
Messages
273
MBTI Type
INTP
Dear God,

Why are you such a tosser? I mean this is the idiomatic sense, of course; I do not believe that you in fact rub one out on a regular basis, for any penis which you possessed would not be material. Unless you were possessing one in the alternative sense of that term, but that would only amount to vicarious satisfaction. Anyway, what I mean is "Why are you such an odious being?".

Lots of love,

Helios.
 

Qlip

Post Human Post
Joined
Jul 30, 2010
Messages
8,464
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I'm getting a bit of a kick that every post in this thread effectively counts as prayer. Lots of devout people here.
 

iwakar

crush the fences
Joined
May 2, 2007
Messages
4,877
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I'm getting a bit of a kick that every post in this thread effectively counts as prayer. Lots of devout people here.

Really? If we're huddling under the religious umbrella at all in this thread, it probably falls under that whole false idol bit.
 

Lark

Active member
Joined
Jun 21, 2009
Messages
29,569
At this point I just want all the anti-religious haters to meet with bolts of lightening. Really and truly. I have lost my patience.
 

Qlip

Post Human Post
Joined
Jul 30, 2010
Messages
8,464
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Really? If we're huddling under the religious umbrella at all in this thread, it probably falls under that whole false idol bit.

Oh, I just thought it was amusing way to look at this thread, I wasn't being any more serious than that.
 

gmanyo

sswwwaagggg
Joined
Jun 8, 2010
Messages
275
MBTI Type
ENTP
Dear God,
Is it okay to date my girlfriend's sister? I mean, assuming they have switched MTBI personalities and the sister is actually my girlfriend in a different body. The sister is hotter than my girlfriend, btw.
 

StrawMan

New member
Joined
Jan 25, 2010
Messages
109
MBTI Type
ENTP
Dear God, I have a couple of probably pretty old questions.

Why don't You want to prove yourself beyond doubt?
And why do You let the good ones die, even if they've had no chance to convert? Why are You not a logical and just dude?
And also, why were You practically a sadist at Abraham's time, and become more lenient, almost a hippy, at the time of new testament?
 

Mole

Permabanned
Joined
Mar 20, 2008
Messages
20,284
G'day God, if quantum fluctuations make the universe eternal, you are out of a job. What will you do with your spare time?
 
A

A window to the soul

Guest
Dear God,

When you say "it's going to be a little while," roughly how long is that?
 
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