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Thread: Ask God

  1. #131
    Senior Member LEGERdeMAIN's Avatar
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    oh....good lord
    “Some people will tell you that slow is good – but I’m here to tell you that fast is better. I’ve always believed this, in spite of the trouble it’s caused me. Being shot out of a cannon will always be better than being squeezed out of a tube. That is why God made fast motorcycles, Bubba…”


  2. #132
    Ginkgo
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  3. #133
    Senior Member Survive & Stay Free's Avatar
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    Dear God,

    First of all thanks for answering all my prayers, seriously everything I ask for is always delivered on some way or another and often straight forwardly or unmistakeably as I asked for it, and awareness of this fact makes the time I lost faith, the legacies associated with that, all the more difficult to recollect. Also thanks for not delivering on any of the irrational emoting which I uttered as lower case prayers when I was angry or despairing, or at least for not delivering on them completely (I was seriously shocked when the ex-boss who I hated really did get in a nasty car crash). Its probably a good thing that I didnt win the lottery that time I got the exact numbers but only the week before those numbers came up. There's a lesson there because I was, even if it was more in my mind than anything else, harbouring a grudge against someone and it was turning toxic. I'd have misused any wealth I suddenly came into then.

    This time I'm asking that some feelings I have for someone will disappear, twice you delivered this person's affections when I asked, on the second occasion this really was a lesson that there are two tragedies in life, the one not to get your heart's desire, the other to get it, this time I'm just asking that any feelings I have for them can just take a hike. I'm pretty sure they're involved with someone else now and its probably a good thing. There was a lot about the time we spent together that I never understood anyway, a lot that seemed ill conceived and confusing, although it was also great and I guess there are relationships like that. It was a bitter sweet deal but I want to move on and it'd also be cool if you could some how secure a workable friendship arrangement between them and me. I'm asking this confidently because there's nothing beyond God, sorry for doubting you before, in some ways its got to be the human condition but there's enough pointers provided by great thinkers who've been through the mill for those that want to work that out.

    Also, thanks for some of the new friends I've made, the books I got today randomly but on topics I needed more than wanted to read about. Cheers for now.

  4. #134
    Senior Member LEGERdeMAIN's Avatar
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    looks like somebody's trying to get banned BY THE POPE!!!!!
    “Some people will tell you that slow is good – but I’m here to tell you that fast is better. I’ve always believed this, in spite of the trouble it’s caused me. Being shot out of a cannon will always be better than being squeezed out of a tube. That is why God made fast motorcycles, Bubba…”


  5. #135

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    Quote Originally Posted by Redbone View Post
    Dear God,

    Are You pretty much like The Aleph?

    Also, do you have the answer to my question that I'm too shy to ask on this thread in the fortune cookie that came with my General Tso's chicken (which was awful...I will hire a cook until I feel better)?
    Redbone,

    I am very much like the Aleph. Everything that ever was is up in my head. Not sure that you guys could see it or understand it though...your brains can't handle the awesomeness. Refer to the Scanners clip earlier in the thread for clarification I'm sorry that your General Tso's chicken was subpar. That is one of my favorite Chinese dishes, but they never make it spicy enough. It always has a chile pepper next to it on the menu, which means it's supposed to be spicy, but it just isn't unless you are a baby or infirm. They should put a quarter of a chile pepper next to that shit.

    Also, I do have the answer to the question you are too shy to ask: Yes, but only the red kind, and only if he agrees to go with you.
    Everybody have fun tonight. Everybody Wang Chung tonight.

    Johari
    /Nohari

  6. #136

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    Quote Originally Posted by Saturned View Post
    Dear God,

    So I am still thinking about this whole time thing and where heaven resides, etc. Do you let us invent stuff in heaven? Can we make mountains? Diamonds? Animals? Because my thinking is that we could possibly be inventing stuff in heaven and then planting these creations on earth to give ourselves joy for when we finally sprout upon the earth. (Since heaven is outside of time, we could theoretically be able to make something in heaven and then put it at any point in time we so choose.) If this is the case, then my soul would like to "call shotgun" on creating ponies and bunnies. Thanks.
    You have many question, Mr. Sparkle.

    Heaven is not your personal holodeck, Saturned. Besides, you cannot invent anything that I haven't already invented, so it wouldn't be truly your creation. You could only imagine a pony because I imagined it first. Heaven is also not a DeLorean with 1.21 jigawatts. Heaven Saturned can't help Earth Saturned, that wouldn't be very fair. Besides, if this were possible, people would be having a lot more fun on Earth, wouldn't they? Everyone would have a pony or a unicorn or a koi pond or a cure for fatness, wouldn't they?

    From what I have read about astronomy and astrophysics.... the universe seems to be pretty darn huge. Is there other life on other planets? Or did you create this entire universe in order to just create our earth in order to just show us how amazing and precious life is?

    ~ 2 halves of a soul, one here, one not here.
    I'm not really sure I should tell you guys the answer to this question. I'll give you a hint, though - remember before when I said you guys need to get over yourselves? Yeah. That is true on lots of levels. I hope this notion doesn't ALIENate you.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ginkgo View Post
    Dear God,

    8=======D~~~~~<3<3
    Gingko,

    You need to take a few equals signs out of that otherwise amusing rendering. Remember, God knows all.
    Everybody have fun tonight. Everybody Wang Chung tonight.

    Johari
    /Nohari

  7. #137

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jonnyboy View Post
    Dear God,

    I hate you and don't believe in you.

    Jonny

    P.S. - I also kind of don't like people who believe in you; they seem stupid to me. Does this make me a bad person? xoxoxo
    Jonny,

    Yes.
    Everybody have fun tonight. Everybody Wang Chung tonight.

    Johari
    /Nohari

  8. #138

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lark View Post
    Dear God,

    First of all thanks for answering all my prayers, seriously everything I ask for is always delivered on some way or another and often straight forwardly or unmistakeably as I asked for it, and awareness of this fact makes the time I lost faith, the legacies associated with that, all the more difficult to recollect. Also thanks for not delivering on any of the irrational emoting which I uttered as lower case prayers when I was angry or despairing, or at least for not delivering on them completely (I was seriously shocked when the ex-boss who I hated really did get in a nasty car crash). Its probably a good thing that I didnt win the lottery that time I got the exact numbers but only the week before those numbers came up. There's a lesson there because I was, even if it was more in my mind than anything else, harbouring a grudge against someone and it was turning toxic. I'd have misused any wealth I suddenly came into then.

    This time I'm asking that some feelings I have for someone will disappear, twice you delivered this person's affections when I asked, on the second occasion this really was a lesson that there are two tragedies in life, the one not to get your heart's desire, the other to get it, this time I'm just asking that any feelings I have for them can just take a hike. I'm pretty sure they're involved with someone else now and its probably a good thing. There was a lot about the time we spent together that I never understood anyway, a lot that seemed ill conceived and confusing, although it was also great and I guess there are relationships like that. It was a bitter sweet deal but I want to move on and it'd also be cool if you could some how secure a workable friendship arrangement between them and me. I'm asking this confidently because there's nothing beyond God, sorry for doubting you before, in some ways its got to be the human condition but there's enough pointers provided by great thinkers who've been through the mill for those that want to work that out.

    Also, thanks for some of the new friends I've made, the books I got today randomly but on topics I needed more than wanted to read about. Cheers for now.
    Lark,

    tl;dr

    Haha, I'm just screwing with you. But seriously, from now on, don't be afraid to edit. I get lots of questions. Thanks for the kind words, I don't get too many of those unless someone wants a pony [not naming any names]. Your request is a thorny one. I don't really interfere in the affairs of men's hearts. It's not my place. All I can do is to say that this too shall pass. This young woman appears to have left these feelings behind, and you will too. It's always hard to be the one that holds onto the feelings the longest, but take heart - it's a sign of the depth and quantity of love you are capable of giving!
    Everybody have fun tonight. Everybody Wang Chung tonight.

    Johari
    /Nohari

  9. #139
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Dear God,

    Being capable of seeing all, thinking all and feeling all, do you ever feel like giving up your day job? or maybe just taking a vacation? What is the hardest part of your job? Is there a Mrs God? Do you ever perv on people while they shower? (Will i go to hell for asking that?)

    Lastly ... Is there a animal heaven?

    Thank you <3
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  10. #140
    Ginkgo
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    Dear God,

    Thank you for creating me. Thank you for creating everything. Thank you for clearing out my resentment, my melancholy, and my general spiritual constipation. You are the Drain-O to my metaphysical piping. I'm looking forward to our relationship growing and taking new turns.

    Ginkgo

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