Why is it after Haight posts, a thread tends to freeze up?
I think you've found your answer gradually as this thread progressed. But the difficulty you have is in accepting it, isn't it?
There are more ways to live than one, and more ways of perceptions and understandings than one.
To draw a parallel: The absoluteness of objectivity, via a clearly defined set of rules, works in some cases, when dealing with binary systems for e.g.
But with humans, to do this would mean you'd end up defining infinitesimal rules for every single action and reaction. Theoretically possible, but practically, it would kill a lot of opportunities for growth.
Fuzzy logic/network logic works better. The relativity offers the chance of redemption and growth, in a way. "Learn as you go along" approach. Understand where someone is coming from, and you'd know how to deal with them better. e.g. a starving child who steals, vs a grown adult who is stealing for kicks. Due process of law would treat both the same. But if you understood the background of someone, would you judge the child differently, in all fairness? Is it not further abuse to send that child to jail for e.g.
Making the right choice, is not always making the best choice. And the best choice is never a perfect one with humans.
'Tis why the process for any system that wishes to grow, needs be relative, vs absolute.
Your fear is that you'd be rejected if you went too far, without knowing what "too far" is, isn't it? But it is the very system of relativity which gives you the chance for redemption, should you go too far too, do you see that?
In the way, me, or whatever, I'm sure, would pull you back if we thought you were going to be jumped off a cliff.
In the way the mods/admins would probably PM you separately to explain further before things go badly wrong.
In the way if you were to be banned, there'd be a chance of coming back.
So, don't fear the unknown. You'd never be able to define rules for everything. But it should not be the reason to avoid everything.
Just know that broadly, if you treat others with respect, if you're honest with where you're coming from, you'll cultivate friendships and a support network. Then you'd not go wrong, both here, and in real life.
You'd make mistakes, as we all do. But you'd have the support of people whom you matter to.
That's what a system of relativity offers. Second chances.