That would be easier if I knew what genuine was. Is it like what I'm saying here, kind of? I could probably do something like that.I still stand by my original advice to you, to simply try to be as genuine as you can when you talk to people and to listen as best you can. Nothing too special or mystical, just attention. I think it would really benefit you as well as take care of your concerns.
Yeah. I think the difference is that I don't really discuss the part of me that accepts/experiences things, because that's something I do without really noticing. I'm hardly even conscious of doing it, but I know that sometimes I probably do. The thing is, I can only tell you about the things I've judged already, because I don't actually understand the things I haven't judged on a conscious level that I can articulate.I would propose that the common theme in both these activities is getting your mind off your worrying, that is, off your thinking and off your habit of assessing and evaluating the data streams that constitute your mind. In the first method, you alleviate your worrying by pretending like you've got nothing to worry about. In the second, you focus your mind on something else, sharply. Acceptance is a lot like the first method. Instead of thinking "I have this, so I don't have to worry," you think "I don't care if I have this, so I don't have to worry." So to that extent, I'd say you're already practicing something a lot like acceptance.
I'll consider it, thanks for the suggestion.Have you ever tried meditating? This is exactly what happens to n00b meditators. It still happens to me when I try and sit without letting my mind wander and judge everything, including the quality of my meditation. Practice.
It's a little of both. I do acknowledge the situation, but I also acknowledge my irritation/disgust with it, and then choose to focus on something else since I know there's nothing I can do about it. Depending on how much it bothers me, I might well complain to someone about how much I dislike it once in a while as a release, though.Are you really tolerating, or are you just withdrawing ("ignoring") and avoiding ("changing the subject")? I think there's a difference. When I think of tolerating something, like my anxiety, I think of confronting it, allowing it to be there, and connecting to it. Ultimately, it's a process of befriending. Withdrawing and escaping is more the opposite and the thing that tends to get me in more trouble. It sounds like you're somewhere in the middle. That's cool.
I think I do use Fe to do things that people expect of me, try to be polite to them and have occasional conversations (although I don't exactly work to be liked), and also to minimize my obligations to them.
It's just that here, I'm discussing all the ideas I'm processing about what could happen and how I would react, not really mentioning what I do. It's more that I want to know that if for some reason people didn't like me (although right now a few of them do and most of them are indifferent), I would have something to fall back on. This is because I became aware of the possibility that there wasn't anything else.