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  1. #11
    Post Human Post Qlip's Avatar
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    Just to get some perspective. What denomenation do you belong to? How do they feel about Catholics? What are their views on baptism? What is their view on communion?

  2. #12
    insert random title here Randomnity's Avatar
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    Why do most people think the bible is the word of god, but then think they're allowed to ignore some silly rules that don't make sense anymore (or that seem tiresome), but not others?

    Why are so many Christians intolerant of non-christians who don't follow christian rules, given that Jesus preached tolerance and humility (and getting your own house in order before you tear someone else's house down)?
    -end of thread-

  3. #13
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    i would be happy to give somewhat sarcastic catholic answers to questions, if anyone is interested.

    example: why do catholic churches have kneelers?
    so it's easier for altar boys...

  4. #14
    Senior Member Nicodemus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    example: why do catholic churches have kneelers?
    so it's easier for altar boys...
    Many people here are opposed to rape jokes.

  5. #15
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nicodemus View Post
    Many people here are opposed to rape jokes.


    i'd say that most catholics would be opposed to rape jokes, but that certainly hasn't stopped sexual assault from occurring within the church. i'm sorry if i've offended anyone, but at the same time, the idea that not making jokes does anything to prevent rape is... well, completely wrong, lol. imo, all subjects should be open for joking about. it's like voldemort's name in harry potter. to restrict speech is to perpetuate taboo.

  6. #16
    Sniffles
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    Default Catholic jokes


    A nun at a Catholic school asked her students what they want to be when they grow up.

    Little Suzy declares, "I want to be a prostitute."

    "What did you say?!" asks the nun, totally shocked.

    "I said I want to be a prostitute," Suzy repeats.

    "Oh, thank heavens," says the nun. "I thought you said 'a Protestant!'"

    ------

    Two men considering a religious vocation were having a conversation. "What is similar about the Jesuit and Dominican Orders? " the one asked.

    The second replied, "Well, they were both founded by Spaniards -- St. Dominic for the Dominicans, and St. Ignatius of Loyola for the Jesuits. They were also both founded to combat heresy -- the Dominicans to fight the Albigensians, and the Jesuits to fight the Protestants."

    "What is different about the Jesuit and Dominican Orders?"

    "Met any Albigensians lately?"

    -------

    A Jesuit, a Dominican, and a Trappist were marooned on a desert island. They found a magic lamp, and after some discussion decided to rub it. Lo and behold, a genie appeared and offered them three wishes. They decided it was only fair that they could each have one wish. The Jezzie said he wanted to teach at the world's most famous university, and poof, he was gone! The Dominican wished to preach in the world's largest church, and poof, he was gone! Then the Trappist said, "Gee, I already got my wish!"

    ------

    A Jewish couple has a son who is a holy terror. When he gets to be of age, he's kicked out of every school they put him in. Finally desperate, the father goes to the Rabbi for advice and the Rabbi says put him in the Catholic school. Shocked, the father asks if the Rabbi sure. "Yes" is the reply, so the father takes him to the nuns and leaves.

    An hour goes by, then two hours, lunch time and finally at three the son comes in says "Good afternoon Papa, good afternoon Mama," goes to the table and starts on his homework. The father is amazed and finally ask why he stayed in school all day and why he is behaving so well. His son looks up and says "Papa when you left, the Mother Superior told me that they did not allow rowdy boys, then she took me to my room. Papa they mean business! They've got a Jew nailed on a Cross in every room!"



    The altar boy jokes have seriously gotten old.

  7. #17
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    geez, you try to have a little fun and everyone shoots you down.

  8. #18
    Senior Member Nicodemus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    i'd say that most catholics would be opposed to rape jokes, but that certainly hasn't stopped sexual assault from occurring within the church.
    There is a fine word for that in the English language: hypocrisy.

  9. #19
    Twerking & Lurking ayoitsStepho's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggly View Post
    I know a christian who was a blatant jerk towards me and as far as I can tell towards the people around him. He loves God to be sure, but doesn't seem to love people the way god commands him to love his children. He comes off as very unloving. Do you think God will let him into heaven considering this pitfall?
    From what you say I'd ask myself if he really loves God because if someone has a love for God you would think they would want to show that love towards people. Plus being a jerk and unloving towards people is exactly opposite of what God asks of believers.
    I don't know, there are lots of people who claim to love God but they really don't even believe, so it's hard to really know.
    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    ayoitsStepho is becoming someone else. Actually her true self, a rite of passage.

  10. #20
    Post Human Post Qlip's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    geez, you try to have a little fun and everyone shoots you down.
    :pats head: Dont' feel bad. Catholics are a very discerning crowd, after all they've been hearing Catholic jokes their entire lives.

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