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  1. #1
    Junior Member infpwonderer's Avatar
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    Cool are our perceived strengths actually our biggest weaknesses?

    Has anyone else ever had a "Wtf???!!!!" Moment where you realised that what you thought you are good at for eons, actually has been your biggest weakness?

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    Carerra Lu IZthe411's Avatar
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    Are you talking over reliance on a strength, or that you just plain suck at something where you thought you were pro?

  3. #3
    Junior Member infpwonderer's Avatar
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    Red face

    Quote Originally Posted by IZthe411 View Post
    Are you talking over reliance on a strength, or that you just plain suck at something where you thought you were pro?
    I'm more talking about values I think. Like the values that we hold as fundamental to who we are. So I had a value, about always respecting other peoples right to an opinion, to the extent that I wouldn't argue with them. At least that was my perception, until I realised and "Wtf!!??"d that it was actually conflict avoidance, and my brain had covered that up so that it was a value that I perceived as a strength. So I thought I was being openminded (strength) and people agreed with me, whereas actually I was conflict avoiding (bad). And for so long that it was outside of my perception that I was, and my brain coated it in a nice sugar flavoured perceived value

    Since then I've been wondering if all perceived strengths are actually our brains way of covering up something else. Because id we are good at something, why would we need to call something a strength?

    Really interested in other peoples experience here, I want to get other peoples perspective have you ever had reality inversion on a perceived strength/value?

  4. #4
    Glowy Goopy Goodness The_Liquid_Laser's Avatar
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    Each of our minds works in a very specific way. Each of us has neural pathways that are naturally stronger than others. So we want to access those pathways whether doing so is healthy or unhealthy for us.

    For example one strength of mine is that I am direct and bold. A weakness of mine is that I don't pick up on social subtleties. But in both cases I am using the same mode of thinking. I am just doing what naturally feels comfortable to me. Whether the traits you possess can be considered strengths or weaknesses depends mostly on context and also somewhat on training.
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    Quote Originally Posted by infpwonderer View Post
    I'm more talking about values I think. Like the values that we hold as fundamental to who we are. So I had a value, about always respecting other peoples right to an opinion, to the extent that I wouldn't argue with them. At least that was my perception, until I realised and "Wtf!!??"d that it was actually conflict avoidance, and my brain had covered that up so that it was a value that I perceived as a strength. So I thought I was being openminded (strength) and people agreed with me, whereas actually I was conflict avoiding (bad). And for so long that it was outside of my perception that I was, and my brain coated it in a nice sugar flavoured perceived value

    Since then I've been wondering if all perceived strengths are actually our brains way of covering up something else. Because id we are good at something, why would we need to call something a strength?

    Really interested in other peoples experience here, I want to get other peoples perspective have you ever had reality inversion on a perceived strength/value?
    There is a lot of delusion. It is usually easier to tell yourself you have a strength of or value of something, and then, only really apply such a value or idea when it is 'convenient' for you. Most people seem to have a decent amount of 'ignorance' about such, which is either intentional or unintentional. It's very interesting to consider how much deception, self-deception, there is. And how there are things in society that help reinforce such.

    Different take: your post also reminded me of this http://www.typologycentral.com/forum...rior-etjs.html
    But that's more how you "suck" at your 'strengths', at odd times. Sort of.

  6. #6
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    There can be a danger in what is internalized as a personal identity because it makes it harder to admit when you don't live up to it. I think people can have blind spots in relationship to their personal identities because they are invested in it - especially if their expectations of self are not realistic.
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    Carerra Lu IZthe411's Avatar
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    I have had this moment- when I doin't remember. It will come to me at some point, but what I do remember is I was down. It beat me up. But in the end, who I really was wasn't really 'worse' than who I thought I was. Different, but not worse.

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    I don't know if my strengths are my biggest weaknesses..

    I think it's more that for every positive reaction there is a negative one.. The Ying and Yang..

    Your strengths have always been your weakness, you weakness has always been your strength.

    It's all in the utilization and timing.

  9. #9
    nee andante bechimo's Avatar
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    To give a concrete example, Te in an ENTJ gets things done but not everyone wants to be directed.

  10. #10
    Post Human Post Qlip's Avatar
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    This premise isn't true for me. I'm often better than I think I am at stuff. Does this happen to people because they put a lot of value in a skill or ability before they even test it in reality?

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