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Thread: To be feared

  1. #31
    Senior Member Survive & Stay Free's Avatar
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    I think its true that intimidation, threatening and creating fear are primitive strategies for getting your needs met.

    I'm unsure of the extent to which the animal kingdom is characterised by this kind of aggression and violence which humankind often paints it with, for instance aggression in the animal kingdom is generally "get out of my space" and it takes that special human element to qualify as truly pursue sadistic, merciless and murderous.

    That said the majority of those who do use these simplistic strategies, the street thugs and muggers, arent usually capable of anything more complex, whether its pain based behaviour or derailed development or maladaptive behavioural habits, whatever way you label it it amounts to the same thing, in the contest of values, resources or needs they cant do any different. Consequently they lose and so do others.

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    Ever seen what chimpanzees do to their rivals?

  3. #33
    RETIRED CzeCze's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Condor View Post
    I don't believe a person can inspire fear or love in others - a person will love or fear another based on what they know about themselves (what it is they love or what it is they fear). Since each person's perception may be (and probably is) different, I'd say it's better to simply be yourself, and others will respond as they may.
    That answers way too deep.

    Just answer the question.

    “If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.” ― Oscar Wilde

    "I'm outtie 5000" ― Romulux

    Johari/Nohari

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    When I was younger I would have answered feared, although now that I'm older and probably at the time too I think to be loved would be a superior and preferable.

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    It depends on what you want to interpret power as and what kind of influence you want.

    Personally speaking, I think one needs to be in a place where it doesn't actually matter how the other person feels 'towards' you. Know who they are and determine whether they ought to be encouraged or discouraged towards whatever it is they are trying to do, and how useful they are in the overall sense.

    --

    Holding fear over other people is only useful in a more or less short run take. I know I sure as hell wouldn't linger around and serve someone who used fear to rule me.

    I think the real prize is influence, and if you really care about 'leadership', then that takes a sense of going beyond yourself. If you're just in it for the glory, people might kowtow to you out of fear and self preservation, but ultimately you won't be any more significant to them than they are to you. So, it depends at what level you want to play the game at.

    Do you want to try to maintain some position of power for the sake of holding on to it, or, do you want to wield it - perhaps even attempt to wield it 'properly' or 'effectively' or 'magnanimously' ; what is your self image and your relation to others, etc. What is the ultimate impact of your own personal state and your impact thereby unto others?

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