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  1. #21
    Senior Member Beargryllz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Annwn View Post
    It is important to note that the categories of "mean" and "dominant" are not synonymous. Dominance is also a quality of charisma and positive reactions. Social creatures require cooperation, so intentionally harming one in a group requires a net positive response from that group. Meanness is also alienating by nature, and very often alpha animals are granted their position by their natural dominance of strength and capability and not simply their willingness to harm other members of their community. An alpha that is too "mean" will tend to absorb the resources of the group and cause its destruction. Regardless of how strong or mean a single member of a group may be, in social animals there is always the possibility of the group joining together to resolve the imbalance of power, so that can place a natural limit on "meanness".
    You are correct. I don't know nearly enough about the psychology of dogs, but I imagine a display of dominance does start one of these failsafe mechanisms to prevent excessive harm to the group.

  2. #22
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    It depends on what you mean by "purposely mean." I think most people deserve basic kindness, and that vulnerable people deserve extra kindness and help. My instinct is to help and/or protect those who are weaker than I am.

    IRL I often agree with people just to not be unpleasant, and sometimes even put up with assholes when I'd rather not. I speculate that this is why I get so argumentative on the Internetz, because I refrain from starting shit with most people IRL.

    On the other hand, some people are such arrogant pieces of shit that they don't deserve to be treated with respect, and I'm very adverse to allowing mean people and arrogant people to 'get away with things.' I think some people's behavior is so incredibly loathesome that I think the greater sin would be to enable them or even allow them to continue their shitty treatment of others.

    I also think sometimes people need a kick in the ass for their own good, and that's not actually being "mean" but some people might view it that way. "Cruel to be kind" and all that.

    Also, verbal sparring can be hella funny. I find it witty and amusing.

    But it appears in the OP that you're talking about actual sadism, which is something that I seriously do not understand either.

  3. #23
    Senior Member Beargryllz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by marmalade.sunrise View Post
    It depends on what you mean by "purposely mean." I think most people deserve basic kindness, and that vulnerable people deserve extra kindness and help. My instinct is to help and/or protect those who are weaker than I am.

    IRL I often agree with people just to not be unpleasant, and sometimes even put up with assholes when I'd rather not. I speculate that this is why I get so argumentative on the Internetz, because I refrain from starting shit with most people IRL.

    On the other hand, some people are such arrogant pieces of shit that they don't deserve to be treated with respect, and I'm very adverse to allowing mean people and arrogant people to 'get away with things.' I think some people's behavior is so incredibly loathesome that I think the greater sin would be to enable them or even allow them to continue their shitty treatment of others.

    I also think sometimes people need a kick in the ass for their own good, and that's not actually being "mean" but some people might view it that way. "Cruel to be kind" and all that.

    Also, verbal sparring can be hella funny. I find it witty and amusing.

    But it appears in the OP that you're talking about actual sadism, which is something that I seriously do not understand either.
    We could label it sadism, but it would just become another human belief. There has to a mechanism in play for a course of action, deemed inappropriate by a majority, to be undertaken anyway. I've always assumed it was an evolutionary advantage to be "sadistic" but also "get away" with it. Sadism with cunning is one of the most terrifying combinations out there for a person, after all. This is doubly true because they openly threaten the majority and posses an arguably greater set of attributes for confrontation, truly the definition of a monster.

  4. #24
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    sometimes people ask for it. You can only take so much stupidity out of a person before you become a sarcastic asshole towards them.
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

  5. #25
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    I don't think sadism is an evolutionary advantage. If anything, it often leads to one's own demise eventually. I think it's generally considered a form of mental illness when it's in the extreme.

  6. #26
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    some people don't even realize they're being mean - the recipient could just be more sensitive than they are.

    and of course, some people are mean because they have a lot of built up anger, for whatever reason.

    and some people have been the victim for so long that they need to exert dominance over someone else.

  7. #27
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    The reason why others feel the need to inflict emotional pain is YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! .... I have no idea why I just said that. I guess I'm no help.

  8. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheHollyLlama View Post
    The reason why others feel the need to inflict emotional pain is YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! .... I have no idea why I just said that. I guess I'm no help.
    You are so mean! You are so mean! You are so mean! But why am I complaining, for we are all meaning creating animals.

  9. #29
    resonance entropie's Avatar
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    In response to the op:

    I personally think that the most of people's meaniness stems from being egoistical and wanting things rather for their own than to see others being successful. There was a guy lately on TV, I'ld type enfp, who wrote a book named "The art of not being an egoist" and that guy was really good, I liked almost everything of what he said. He said that humanity tends to have a sense for unfairness but not for fairness. He said, when having a cushion fight with his 8 year old son and he is in a better position, like standing on a box or the couch, his son will say that the game is unfair. But when they've switched positions and his son is on the couch, the son wont say its unfair again. This is a good example that shows that sensing unfairness is an evolutionary thing and is obviously imprinted in our very gene code. But being fair, everyone has to learn.

    If you take a look at our society, you sense unfairness everywhere. It can even make you go mad if you really dig deep into the matter. Food industry for example that wants to minimize their costs everywhere and let kids work for our coffee. There was a good documentation lately on television about Nestle, who buy their beans from Columbia. A reporter made the documentary and showed that you can have a kid to work on your farm for you for $250 on the black market. Nestle commented this with: "We are trieing to work against kid work by spending 4 million dollar per year". If you then know that their yearly turnover is 400 billion, their statement reads like a bad joke.

    Another thing we all know of is the expanding gap between the rich and the poor. Some people have so much money they can never spend it. In japan for example there is another morality. It says that when a manager earns more than 1 million dollar a year, he would be considered immorale and would have a lesser standing in society. The reason behind this is to prevent money from being allocated unfairly throughout society and to make a lasting society work, in which everyone can become prosperous to some degree. The western world on the other hand has something like a Forbes Magazine that gives rich people the motivation to even earn more money because they aint no.1 in Forbes yet.

    I am personally convinced that the next generation will have a higher morale demand on society itself and will want more fairness. I'll teach my kids fairness and I think this is a thing everyone can do. There are already the first signs on the horizon of a fundamental change in society in Germany. The generation that is my age demand for fair products and clean food not all those readymade sauces or x-ray lunches that have a lot of artificial flavouring compounds or glutamate. People are sich of seeing manager getting paied for failure and getting paid horrendous amounts of money while they themselves earn lesser and lesser. There will be a change, there always will be in a case like that and I hope that after the next revolution, we'll make a better job of teaching our kids the meaning of fairness
    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  10. #30
    Senior Member Mephistopheles's Avatar
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    There are many different reasons in my experience for this:

    1. They just really, really dislike the person they're mean to. Sometimes, it's just as easy as that.

    2. Others were often mean to them in their childhood, which causes them to have a negative impression of the mankind, thus making them mean themself.

    3. Nobody(or, more often, anybody ASIDE the parents) complaint about them in their childhood although they were egoistic and mean, so that they never learned that this isn't the proper way to behave.

    4.They have build up temporaly anger, which needs a valve.

    5. They lack empathy.

    6. They like to be mean because it makes them feel strong(self-esteem issues maybe?....).

    etc.

    You have to say the specific case to get concrete about the reason of them being mean.
    They say I only think in form of crunching numbers.....
    -Fall Out Boy

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