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The 9 most badass Bible verses

KDude

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I think Ezekiel had some major issues and wasn't badass. He also heard God tell him to cook food with his own shit. Something like that. :confused: I think he talked God out of it, so I'll give him some credit for not being quite fully insane.. but still. :dont:
 

Abstract Thinker

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The only one I care about: "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."

Makes all the other nonsense worth it.
 

Jeffster

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Those are pretty good, however my favorite is still Proverbs 10:3 which is more brief and to the point:

"If you are wise, it will show when you speak. But if you are stupid, you will be beaten with a stick."
 

Moiety

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Deuteronomy 25:11-12 was the best. So what? Women go out and about grabbing their lovers' balls in the street??
 

miss fortune

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damn... I'm going to lose a hand :sadbanana:

however, the land of Egypt may become a hot tourist destination... for ladies anyways :devil:
 

Nonsensical

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I enjoyed the bear mauling one.

that was the fucking most raddest thing I've read in the last 3 days.
 

swordpath

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I enjoyed the bear mauling one.

that was the fucking most raddest thing I've read in the last 3 days.
Haha, yeah. The last bit is priceless.

It should be pointed out that even after his death, Elisha continued to kick ass. II Kings 13:20-21 tells us that when a dead body was thrown into his tomb and touched Elisha's bones, it sprang back to life. It's unknown whether Elisha had this power in life, as well as death, but we like to think he did and that he had the habit of killing his victims with bears, resurrecting them, and then promptly re-summoning the bears to kill them, again. He'd just repeat the whole thing over and over until he got bored.
 

foolish heart

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Why did the guy want 200 Palestinian foreskins?

He didn't... he wanted David to get killed in the process. He actually asked for 100, then not only did David not die, but he came back with twice that many.

Personally, I want to know how they carried them around. :sick: What, did they like... string them together like a popcorn necklace or something?
 
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