User Tag List

First 1234 Last

Results 11 to 20 of 85

  1. #11
    ~*taaa raaa raaa boom*~ targobelle's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    enfp
    Posts
    2,585

    Default

    Yah I don't really get along or fit in my with family either, nor do I fit with my husbands family, one on one it's all good once we're in a group though I get lost, as my mother in law (ESFJ {think??}) has us all in our specific roles.... UGH!



    Quote Originally Posted by ptgatsby View Post
    There are many topics that we need to keep inside - money, sex, beliefs... we aren't free to just be ourselves.

    oddly enough my husband and i have one friend who is actually in the 'know' as far as this info goes, and interestingly enough knowing this about each other has really brought us closer as far as friends, I mean we are almost like family in that we would do anything for each other. He does at time try to stay quiet about some things but I can read him like a book
    ~t ...in need of hugs please...
    Jung Test Results
    Extroverted (E) 63.16% Intuitive (N) 60.53% Feeling (F) 84.38% Perceiving (P) 87.1% ~Your type is: ENFP

  2. #12
    Senior Member substitute's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    MBTI
    ENTP
    Posts
    4,601

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ptgatsby View Post

    However, I must admit that I do feel this with my family - the one group that I tried talking to. No one in my family is a very good listener and they were the only ones I could talk to.
    That reminds me of a recurring nightmare I've had since I was about 14. It usually runs something like this: my sister has done something terribly wrong to me. I mean really wrong like murder one of my kids in cold blood or something like that, and everyone knows it and she's not denying it at all. I run around beside myself with grief, trying to get some comfort and get justice done, but everyone in my family just laughs at me and dismisses me. They say "Oh look, there you go making mountains out of molehills all the time" and "you always hold everyone to such stupidly high standards!" and stuff like that, while my sister sits beside them on the sofa eating chips and watching TV and totally not bothered about the whole thing. I keep on screaming and screaming and crying but the more I do, the less they seem to hear me until I find that no matter how hard I try, though my throat is hoarse and sore from shouting, no sound can come out and I become invisible and everyone just ignores me and watches TV.


    I think that deep down inside, all of us have a need to feel special, to be acknowledged and be unique. We are suppose to have a sort of community around us, to identify it and all that...
    I agree with this. Well, sorta... I don't think people don't want the connection, I just think they think it'd be imposing on someone else, to pursue it. And too much effort. And I don't think it's necessarily a big city thing... I'm not sure what it is, but I've been to big cities in other cultures, such as Delhi, where people sit on their doorsteps and wander the streets all evening and talk to random people. It's totally acceptable there and normal to just go knock on your neighbour's door, even if you never met them before, and say "I was just feeling bored and lonely so I thought I'd come and have a drink with you", and they make tea and bring food in and stuff and you just chat.

    I think there's a sorta culture in the West where independence is revered out of all proportion, so like it's considered sad and pathetic and just stupid for someone to want/need company or comfort. If I knock on my neighbour's door (some of them) they look at me the minute the open it with suspicion, they're defensive if I ask them any questions ("whose is that blue car out there?" "It's not mine!" "no? I thought maybe it was because it's parked nearest your house" "no it's definitely not mine, I always park on my drive" - they think I have some kinda problem with it automatically - "well I just wanted to let them know they left their lights on..." "Oh..."). They remind me of a kid who, when you ask "have you seen my black pen?" replies "I haven't touched it!" when you never said they did lol And if you just knock on the door and say you came by for coffee and you didn't already meet them at school/work/college/some other organized environment, they think you're crazy and creepy and stuff and make excuses to get rid of you.

    I'm not sure why people do this, because i hear so many people complaining about loneliness and then see them doing these exact kinds of things.
    Ils se d�merdent, les mecs: trop bon, trop con..................................MY BLOG!

    "When it all comes down to dust
    I will kill you if I must
    I will help you if I can" - Leonard Cohen

  3. #13
    Courage is immortality Valiant's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    MBTI
    ENTJ
    Enneagram
    8w7 sx/so
    Socionics
    EIE
    Posts
    3,919

    Default

    I've got the opposite problem, I stick out everywhere (even tho I don't try hard) and I talk way too much most of the time o.o I can't stay low. Effing impossible. Can't go shopping groceries with a hangover looking like shit without running into the whole town. Sometimes I wish people wouldn't see me comming from a mile away and rushing in to talk. At times... Like today. Huge big fat irish-style hangover.

    I do agree with targo about ENXP bein the sad clown sometimes My dad's an ENTP and he is always feeling neglected, alone, bitter and overlooked... Wich is weird, because I can assure you he very much isn't ignored or overlooked

    Mightier than the tread of marching armies is the power of an idea whose time has come

  4. #14
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    ExTJ
    Posts
    1,377

    Default

    I've kind of gotten used to seeming invisible in a lot of places, though some times it gets extremely annoying. The main annoyance I find to be when I spend some time coming up with some sort of idea, or something else to say, put it out into the world, and it gets swallowed up and ignored by a bunch of people goofing around. (This is a more internet oriented example.) It is also annoying in situations where I am not much of a talker, but do occasionally have something to say, yet it gets ignored by all the other bigger talkers, almost as if the only way to ever get noticed is to make loud noises all the time.

    I don't really see this as an issue with independence/city life as much as an issue with difficulties taking a step back and thinking about things, or laziness that leads people to only focus on their own group or on whatever makes the loudest bang, instead of stepping back and taking more in.

  5. #15
    Senior Member Sandy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    MBTI
    INFP
    Posts
    552

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by targo View Post
    go through life just feeling invisible? Like people only see your smile or your face but that they never see you? Never see who is behind the 'mask'. It seems like people are so busy running that they never stop to listen or to hear what you're saying. As of late I just feel that I am invisible. Do you think it's society as a whole that walks through life like that? Do you think it's a predisposed sort of thing for specific MBTI types? Or do you just think it's a case by case situation?
    It's the story of much of my life. Sometimes I think it's just me, though.
    -Sandy
    I - 75% N - 55% F - 55% P - 61%
    Enneagram 4w5

    There is love... in the red letters
    There is truth... in the red letters

  6. #16
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Enneagram
    827 sp/so
    Posts
    20,126

    Default

    I really think that my feelings of being noticed probably stem from the fact that I notice everything and everyone around me at all times (Se perhaps?)- it seems from looking at responses so far that it's the Ss who feel more visible and the Ns more invisible, that's just a guess though!
    “Oh, we're always alright. You remember that. We happen to other people.” -Terry Pratchett

  7. #17
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    MBTI
    eNFJ
    Enneagram
    4w3 sx/so
    Socionics
    eNFJ Ni
    Posts
    11,443

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by whatever View Post
    I really think that my feelings of being noticed probably stem from the fact that I notice everything and everyone around me at all times (Se perhaps?)- it seems from looking at responses so far that it's the Ss who feel more visible and the Ns more invisible, that's just a guess though!
    I concur. The level of inherent disconnect experienced by the N is certainly part of the problem. Ss are naturally more "in the moment" and grounded, so they would be less likely to suffer from "invisibility".

    My ESTJ mother calls it "insubstantial". She means, immaterial. Almost like vapor. She doesn't say it to be mean. I think she's made a good statement there. Ns *are* pretty ethereal or ephemeral.
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
    Neutral Good
    EII-Fi subtype, Ethical/Empath, Delta/Beta
    RLUEI, Choleric/Melancholic
    Inquistive/Limbic
    AIS Holland code
    Researcher: VDI-P
    Dramatic>Sensitive>Serious

  8. #18

    Default

    I definitely feel invisible. But as a pathologically shy INTJ, that's my fault, not anyone else's. Truth be told, it's more comfortable for me to be invisible, even if it's not the best thing for me.

  9. #19
    Senior Member alcea rosea's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    7w6
    Socionics
    ????
    Posts
    3,665

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by targo View Post
    go through life just feeling invisible? Like people only see your smile or your face but that they never see you? Never see who is behind the 'mask'. It seems like people are so busy running that they never stop to listen or to hear what you're saying. As of late I just feel that I am invisible. Do you think it's society as a whole that walks through life like that? Do you think it's a predisposed sort of thing for specific MBTI types? Or do you just think it's a case by case situation?
    I don't know if it is the same thing but I feel transparent very often (as I said in my blog that I just started). I feel like people see through me as if I was too open and some of them leach my energy and abuse my emotional responses.

  10. #20
    Senior Member INTJMom's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Posts
    5,349

    Default

    I don't know that I've ever had the word "invisible" pop into my feelings, but I know I've felt unloved, unwanted, rejected, and alone for most of my life. Is that the same thing?

    I think the N types might struggle with this more than the S types. As an N, we tend to pay more attention to life "below the surface". That ability to feel invisible in a room full of people must come from our awareness of and attention to the iNtuitive part of relationships. I know I have a deep hunger to be known and understood to my innermost depths. Feeling misunderstood, or not understood, makes me feel alone.

Similar Threads

  1. Do you ever ask question if you know the answer?
    By Virtual ghost in forum General Psychology
    Replies: 55
    Last Post: 06-05-2010, 07:03 PM
  2. [MBTItm] Do you ever get "hungry" for a good argument?
    By ygolo in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 61
    Last Post: 04-19-2009, 12:31 AM
  3. [MBTItm] Do You Ever Feel the Pageant of Life Has Poor Storylines?
    By SquirrelTao in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 10-31-2008, 10:50 PM
  4. Do you ever have those days . . .
    By INA in forum The Bonfire
    Replies: 49
    Last Post: 09-25-2008, 01:45 PM
  5. Do you ever....?
    By Xander in forum The Bonfire
    Replies: 23
    Last Post: 06-15-2007, 01:41 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO