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  1. #1
    Senior Member ThatsWhatHeSaid's Avatar
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    Question What is the Root of Personal Development?

    Where does it all begin? What's the first and most important step a personal can take in their quest for contentment? Is it something internal like a realization or attitude or being present, or something external like having your own space or being close to nature? Why is that thing so important?

    * * *

    A few things on my mind are self-respect, kindness, skepticism, hope, and having a healthy and sensible dinner vision of where you want to end up. I suppose some of these might be more appropriate than others, but having a good idea of where you want to get to is probably the most critical thing, because if you have that, you can figure out how your life is different and begin developing some of the other qualities and factors that are inherent in that final vision.

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    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Recognizing your weaknesses and what makes you happy.

    For example, I'm stuck in a rut. I have poor follow-through, I don't like doing things out of obligation and my current environment suffocates me.

    Enter traveling. As soon as I can I'm gonna try and study in an european exchange program. New environment, new possibilities, new people.

    All things my Ne craves and has been constantly denied throughout life in a small city that that bores me to death, in a major that I hate etc


    EDIT: In MBTI terms I think the second function is key to know what to do. In my case, what feels right. In an ENTJs case pursuing his vision. In an ISFPs case to pursue clay modelling or something...

  3. #3
    Kraken down on piracy Lux's Avatar
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    For myself, with my personal development, it is taking responsibility for my own life. Seeing that no matter what is thrown at me, I can make something better out of it. Seeing that all of the hard/bad/awful experiences make me who I am, just as much as the easy/good/wonderful ones do.

    Recognizing that anything bad can be seen as an opportunity for growth, and to mentally or emotionally evolve.
    "It is not length of life, but depth of life." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

    "Thought breeds thought." ~ Henry David Thoreau

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    Senior Member ThatsWhatHeSaid's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sytpg View Post
    Recognizing your weaknesses and what makes you happy.

    For example, I'm stuck in a rut. I have poor follow-through, I don't like doing things out of obligation and my current environment suffocates me.

    Enter traveling. As soon as I can I'm gonna try and study in an european exchange program. New environment, new possibilities, new people.

    All things my Ne craves and has been constantly denied throughout life in a small city that that bores me to death, in a major that I hate etc
    This brings up a very important questions -- how does one know what makes them happy? How can a person distinguish between what makes them truly happy, and what makes fleeting moments of happiness?

    An addict might decide that drugs make him happy. It's convenient to say "let him decide on his own," but I actually don't think being high is a deep state of happiness. It takes moments of honesty and reflection for an addict to see the difference between being high and being really happy and then mustering the willpower to pursue the latter.

    In that case, should we say that the root of personal development is KNOWING what true happiness looks like?

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    Senior Member ThatsWhatHeSaid's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lux View Post
    For myself, with my personal development, it is taking responsibility for my own life. Seeing that no matter what is thrown at me, I can make something better out of it. Seeing that all of the hard/bad/awful experiences make me who I am, just as much as the easy/good/wonderful ones do.

    Recognizing that anything bad can be seen as an opportunity for growth, and to mentally or emotionally evolve.
    That sounds like a nice recipe for closure and hope. I like it. Have you read anything by Victor Frankl? Logotherapy, his theory, has a similar theme.

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    Senior Member Jaguar's Avatar
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    The day I become content, I may as well be dead.

  7. #7
    Kraken down on piracy Lux's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by xNTP View Post
    That sounds like a nice recipe for closure and hope. I like it. Have you read anything by Victor Frankl? Logotherapy, his theory, has a similar theme.
    No I have not read anything by him. *Jots down note*

    Sometimes closure and hope outweigh happiness. I am not exactly sure happiness is the key to my personal development, or even the end goal. I think perhaps balance is more necessary for myself.
    "It is not length of life, but depth of life." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

    "Thought breeds thought." ~ Henry David Thoreau

  8. #8
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    i think that's an important start yeah...you have to know the goal to achieve it.

    and i think like sy said recognizing your weaknesses or limitations...knowing your unhealthy habits...like me as a 7 is distraction...bad feeling...distract myself...never deal with it...knowing that i need to recognize when i'm doing it and go through it...it's so instinctual tho...feels like it will be a life long lesson...so knowing it...accepting it...going through the process and growing from it and behaving differently and work towards those healthy goals that make you happy.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

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    Senior Member ThatsWhatHeSaid's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lux View Post
    No I have not read anything by him. *Jots down note*

    Sometimes closure and hope outweigh happiness. I am not exactly sure happiness is the key to my personal development, or even the end goal. I think perhaps balance is more necessary for myself.
    Balance between what and what?

  10. #10
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by xNTP View Post
    This brings up a very important questions -- how does one know what makes them happy? How can a person distinguish between what makes them truly happy, and what makes fleeting moments of happiness?

    An addict might decide that drugs make him happy. It's convenient to say "let him decide on his own," but I actually don't think being high is a deep state of happiness. It takes moments of honesty and reflection for an addict to see the difference between being high and being really happy and then mustering the willpower to pursue the latter.

    In that case, should we say that the root of personal development is KNOWING what true happiness looks like?
    You hit the nail right in the head. The only problem I have overcoming lack of content is knowing whether I'm gravitating towards ephemeral happiness or if I'm actually laying strong foundations for sustainable happiness and/or content.

    Personally I play my assigned ENFP role really poorly. I deny my Ne instincts all the time. So lately I've become sort of fascinated with changing that. But it will probably only grant me temporary highs.

    So I look deeper. Hmm...what I really want isn't to be in a different city. I'm just sick of the same people all day long and feel lonely. Hmm...what I really like is not some unproductive lazy ass that can't finish a major simply because he doesn't love it to death. I just lack motivation to do it.

    It is my firm believe that to me, sustained happiness will consist of surrounding myself of people, making friends, in a place where I can try out different things than I have here in my hometown and in a job that will grant me a certain degree of creative freedom.

    But smelling the roses is very important. Instead of drowning in "high" city though, I will myself to occasionally try something ephemeral ...to experience...so that I can more accurately understand what I really like in life.



    I'd say the true root of personal development IS knowing what true happiness looks like. Which is exactly the same thing as knowing yourself. And the best place to start is to name all the things one does NOT like.

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