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  1. #11
    Senior Member Rangler's Avatar
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    Haha pie charts are fun.

    Realistically, if they have some credibility with you, explore the issue privately, and thank them for bringing it to your attention. Other than that, someone is trying to fuck with you. You can dismiss it through exaggeration, as my first post does. It sends a signal of confidence.
    R[a]ngl[e]r

  2. #12
    pathwise dependent FDG's Avatar
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    Everything that other people think of as an imperfection of mine, is just the flipside of a fantastic trait.
    ENTj 7-3-8 sx/sp

  3. #13
    Senior Member INTJMom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wildcat View Post
    How do you react to the judgement of other people?
    Of your faults.

    Are you ashamed or irritated, or both, or neither?
    I used to feel deeply ashamed when someone would discover one of my faults.
    I mean deeply ashamed.
    It took a long time to develop a healthier response,
    one that is more constructive than destructive.
    It's still uncomfortable, but a lot more bearable.

    Usually it's something I already knew about myself.,
    but like a lot of INTJs, I try pretty hard to hide my imperfections,
    they're embarrassing.

  4. #14
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    I definitely try to take it to heart, but not without trying to "unfilter" it through their potential biases first. For example, someone who's extremely pissed off could probably say irrational things as a manifestation of taking something out on me.. so I know to disregard most of it because of their state of mind. I still learn something from the experience, both about them and about myself, though.

  5. #15
    Senior Member Dwigie's Avatar
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    Depends on who, where, when and what.
    I sometimes am plain blunt and accepting of certain of my flaws but won't let anyone else touch my sensitive points.
    (Ok, I usually end up fessing up even if it is intimidating to be "exposed" and subjected to criticism.)
    Sometimes I feel like I'm "on Mercury"-

  6. #16
    movin melodies kiddykat's Avatar
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    The management of self-imperfection? lol. I tend to laugh at myself a lot. That's how I manage it. When I see something I can improve on, I practice on whatever it is. To me no one's perfect, mostly myself. That's ok. =)

    If people have beef with me, I prefer they tell me to my face, so we can sort it out. What I learned in life is to stick with people who enjoy others and accept them as they are. That kind of attitude, love, conditioning, encourages people to be their best 'selves' when they acknowledge appropriate boundaries.

    One thing I never understood was when people say: "You need to change this and that." It's like: "Who are YOU to tell me what to do??" I believe in constructive criticism. I also believe in respect. And when I mean Respect, I mean, respecting the individual person by loving them for who they are. In turn, they develop growth potential. That's why Carl Rogers is probably one of my favorite psychologists.

  7. #17
    S Saiyan God Mace's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ThatsWhatHeSaid View Post
    Depends on their motivation and my need for their approval. Here, I'll make a chart, because charts are awesome.

    ..........................................Motivation
    ................................Constructive...........Malicious
    Attachment
    Needy..........................Worried...............Dismissive
    ...............................but attentive

    Secure........................Dismissive.............Anger/Resentment
    ...............................but attentive
    That's cool.

  8. #18
    Scream down the boulevard LadyJaye's Avatar
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    I live, whether I want to or not, a largely transparent life. It's painful to have my flaws exposed all the time, but it also helps me to prioritize what comments by others are worth getting upset over and which should just be blown off. I'm not immune to criticism at all - I feel things deeply, especially if I feel like I'm being chastised or purposefully humiliated. I can't control how I feel, but I can control how I react. That has been a big help as well.

  9. #19
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    If the critisism is accurate, it stabs a big hole in my heart initially. But I can usually absorb it slowly and not react too much. I just listen and take it in, feeling a little bad. Then I think about it a bit, and then do my best to change the problem.
    If its clearly inaccurate I get annoyed defend myself. (Which makes it look like i'm being very defensive and sensitive but i'm really just trying to correct them.)

  10. #20
    Diabolical Kasper's Avatar
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    Learning how others perceive you is a quick way to self awareness. Those who judge quickly are not the type of people Id chose to befriend but their judgments are valued when valid.

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