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  1. #1
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    Default Reading religious texts in full

    Has anyone here read in it's entirety, like from cover to cover like a normal book, any religious texts (i.e. Bible, Quran, Talmud, etc.)?

    I've only ever met one person who did this with The Bible.

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    Senior Member Simplexity's Avatar
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    I don't even know if I can tell you how the cover looks like, is their a price tag, bar code?
    My cold, snide, intellectual life is just a veneer, behind which lies the plywood of loneliness.

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    On a mission Usehername's Avatar
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    Need it necessarily be in order?

    I'm working my way through everything in the Bible, but I like to rotate between OT and NT, and I take breaks from the order to reread books I more easily resonate with whenever I think of reading a certain piece of text as a chore (and then come back to it later when I actually want to learn from it).

    My friend's grandma reads the entire Bible every single year. I know several people who have been through the entire thing several times. (I'm not one of them.)
    *You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.
    *Faith is the art of holding on to things your reason once accepted, despite your changing moods.
    C.S. Lewis

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    Senior Member locke's Avatar
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    I've read the Tao Te Ching in full. (Victor H. Mair translation)
    I want something much more different
    Not these factories or prisons
    I wish that the Earth was green again
    I wish I had a gun in my hand


    --Blackbird Raum

  5. #5
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    Ive glanced through my Bible.

    Recently I read the Book of Revealations. What can I say, all those people who claim they've deciphered its language and know when the End Times will happen have clearly been drinking too much cough syrup.

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    Kickin' Ass since 1984 GargoylesLegacy's Avatar
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    We "had to" read the Bible in School back then in Switzerland during Religion-Class. And I mean not for just ourselves. It was like a reading-out-loud, where Every1 had to take a few Passages. Then we "worked with it". If that counts.
    Rule #1: Driver picks the music. Shotgun shuts his cakehole.

    Again, Demons I get, but people are just crazy.

    ESTP? o.O

  7. #7
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad Mole's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hmm View Post
    Has anyone here read in it's entirety, like from cover to cover like a normal book, any religious texts (i.e. Bible, Quran, Talmud, etc.)?

    I've only ever met one person who did this with The Bible.
    I read the Bible from cover to cover and found not one joke or even a funny story. And as the Bible is the inspired word of God, I presume God has no sense of humour.

    This is a very peculiar conclusion to come to, I think you will agree. So I looked around for anything else that lacks a sense of humour. And guess what, I found it.

    Trance has no sense of humour for the very simple reason that by entering a trance, we progressively turn off our cognitive faculties. And to my surprise, I discovered that the sense of humour is a cognitive faculty.

    So I was led to the conclusion that the Bible was written in a trance.

    And we know that the easiest way to induce a trance in others, is to first induce a trance in oneself - and this is just what the Bible has done.

    So we conclude that the Bible was written in a trance and induces a trance in those that read it.

    And the purpose of entrancement is simply to suspend disbelief. And of course belief is the essence of Christianity.

    And this is why the Bible is entrancing.

  8. #8
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    Weird. I think the Patriarchs with their sarcasm are hilarious. Also Paul, when he stands before the Pharisees and Sadducees and declares that is his belief in the resurrection of the dead that has landed him in troubled, knowing full well it was going to start a huge fight between those factions was really funny, too. And that time when Ehud assassinates Eglon and goes out the window and Eglon's servants are worried, but are afraid to go into the room because he might be on the pot. I'm notoriously easily amused, though.

    To the OP, I haven't read the entire Bible. I've probably read everything but the books of the major prophets, though.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  9. #9
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad Mole's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cafe View Post
    Weird. I think the Patriarchs with their sarcasm are hilarious. Also Paul, when he stands before the Pharisees and Sadducees and declares that is his belief in the resurrection of the dead that has landed him in troubled, knowing full well it was going to start a huge fight between those factions was really funny, too. And that time when Ehud assassinates Eglon and goes out the window and Eglon's servants are worried, but are afraid to go into the room because he might be on the pot. I'm notoriously easily amused, though.

    To the OP, I haven't read the entire Bible. I've probably read everything but the books of the major prophets, though.
    You are plainly entranced by the Bible. You are so entranced, you see humour where there is none - this is the triumph of belief over reality.

    But I have seen no one giggling and laughing their way through the Bible.

    Entrancement is lovely but the most important thing is waking up afterwards.

    Wake up!

  10. #10
    Doesn't Read Your Posts Haight's Avatar
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    To the Op:

    Like yes . . . several times.
    "The only time I'm wrong is when I'm questioning myself."
    Haight

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