fear of being center of attention

[Clover]

I am never the center of attention, so I wouldn't really know how that feels. Sure I have spoken in front of people, but I know half of them aren't paying attention or even caring about what I am saying anyway. I am just a tiny little insignificant spec in their day, they will forget me sooner or later. At least that's what I tell myself to push my anxiety away, it's actually a rather soothing thought, though I can see how some people might find it disturbing...

[Anja]

I have a love/hate relationship with it.

I've been in jobs that have called for public speaking and I enjoy being in front of people and talking about something that I am sure about. But if I'm out of practice I hope for a podium because it's a guarantee that my buttocks will be quivering with fright and it robs me of credibility if people see me doing a sort-of standing hula while emoting.

It passes after a few moments and a bit of goodwill from my audience.

When I was a young thing I was complaining to a friend about how I hate to be stared at and she answered, "Well, look at you! You've got on that red frou-frou top pulled down to bare your shoulders, your shorts are too short and you've got a danged flower tucked behind one ear. Make up your mind!" *Blush.*

(Later she told me that she planned to wear a purple turban to her daughter's wedding and asked me if I thought that might be "too much." Heh. Like attracts like?)

I still don't get that "negative attention is better than none" thing that some people do, though.

I think with age a person become more sure of who they are and so then less uncomfortable. And in a society that puts little value on the elderly I've discovered that the general populace doesn't pay that much attention anyway. That gives my inner rascal a chance to come out and play!