What's it like to be a Feeler?

[Jack Flak]

Originally Posted by PinkPiranha

I ate a Lite Brite!

Post of the year, ladies and gentlemen!

[kyuuei]

It rocks.

..Well, to put it in a bit more words. It really rocks.

>.o but seriously.. I have no idea how to detach my emotions. I am literally *incapable* of thinking about something without my emotions getting involved. You'll see in my posts I'll constantly say "I feel this..".. because it is the same as thinking to me. It got me into a nasty little spat with BlueWing, who kept yelling at me that feelings were not related to the subject!

The few times I am emotionally detached, it's survival mode. There's no thinking involved, it goes straight from morally-logical to instinct.

[GinKuusouka]

Hmmm... I'm not sure if this is quite what you meant or not, but I'm going to give this a go. (Mind you, I'm in a semi-depressed mood at the moment, just so you realize that may color what I'm about to say at least a little bit.)

I am able to comprehend things and think them through, with some effort. And sometimes I can put my feelings to the side to do so. But that actually hurts me. Not to the point of where I feel physical pain. It's more like the pain of hearing a starving newborn kitten crying out for its mother. My emotions are just that much a part of me. I feel things to a great depth. I have even felt the emotions of those I hold dear to my heart when I'm about 150 miles from them. And though sometimes I don't feel as if I have control over what I feel or to what depth I feel it, I believe that I can control how I react to it.

Actually, I've learned through quite a few experiences that my emotions are more trustworthy than my logic. Of course that's not going to be true for everyone. But I had almost no logic when I was growing up. The basics. "This is hot. Stay away from it." Stuff like that. But anything beyond that? I couldn't grasp it. It took me quite a while to be able to work on a much deeper level with my logic. I can now, but only with great effort. However, I've also learned to 'feel' when something is right and I go with it. I'm not always right, but I chalk it up to a learning experience. We each learn in our own way.

My actions through feelings used to be more out of control (there would have to be an understanding about certain events in my life). I acted like a spoiled brat only a few short years ago, mostly because I was scared and very uncomfortable in my environment. When I was growing up, my actions through feelings were about pleasing others in a fantasy/child-like manner. (I was a child after all.) Basically picking flowers for my mother, trying to do whatever I was told in order to please those around me, and basically just being quiet and out of the way. Now however, I prefer my actions to be genuine, for myself first and then for others. However, it doesn't always work out that way. (There are some things I feel it will take a lifetime, if not more, to learn.) As well, I try to show courtesy to others that I would myself enjoy. Trying to remember to say 'please' and 'thank you'. lol I'm also stubborn about certain issues close to my heart. Which I'm sure would be expected of about anyone, T or F.

I'm not certain that there's anything more that I can post. I thought you did a wonderful job of wording what you wanted to hear. I only hope that I didn't quite overdo it. (Methinks I did however... lol) In return, if you don't mind, I would be curious to hear back from you about the same questions in reverse for Ts. Perhaps, if it hasn't been done already, I should make a thread for that later on.

[niffer]

Keep in mind that although I am definitely an F in profile, my T and F are pretty much equal. So I hardly relate with the NF temperament anymore.

Originally Posted by Tallulah

1) When you talk about feelings/emotions, how do you experience them?

When I'm simply talking about them, I only experience them in a detached, objective way.

2) Do you always go on your feelings? Do you feel that your emotions are "trustworthy?"

No, I try not to, even though it does feels better when I go with them and pretend they are.

Do you ever feel like your view of a situation is clouded by your personal feelings?

I'm pretty sure it rarely happens. But once I realize that, I'd be level-headed enough to not be anymore.

3) How does the feeling translate into action?

Sometimes it is controllable, and sometimes is it not. Sometimes it is controllable yet I choose not to control it; sometimes I would've chosen to control it but let it out on an impulse anyway. Sometimes it shows up on my face. Sometimes a feeling I have about something can inspire/motivate me to create art or plan a social movement.

4) Anything else you feel like sharing. I'm just a T, so I'm not even sure how to word all this in F language.

Everything is personal. Even though I may not respond to everything as though it is personal, everything is internalized, and every facet of the world is something that becomes a personal part of me. I'm not sure what I mean or how to say it...lol.

You don't have to answer each individual question, as I probably repeated myself. Just give us an idea of what it's like to be F in this crazy world.

Lol whoops.

[FireyPheonix]

1) When you talk about feelings/emotions, how do you experience them?
I feel emotions almost physically. The good ones feel great, bad ones hurt.
It's very difficult for me to express, I feel other peoples emotions psyically too.
2) Do you always go on your feelings? Do you feel that your emotions are "trustworthy?" Do you ever feel like your view of a situation is clouded by your personal feelings?
Not all the time, but most of the time. I have doubts at the moment, but for the most part they are trustworthy. Yes, my personal view has been clouded by emotions, especially unadressed ones, and when I second guess myself.
I can come across as kinda cold at times, but mostly people see me as a little tortured and self contained... I try to hold back my emotions as they are intense, and others could not cope. I barely cope at times, when it all comes spilling out. Don't get me wrong, this makes me sound like I'm a slave to my feelings, and I'm not...but it can be messy if I'm feeling intensly. A friend once accused me of pouring all my emotions into my artwork, and never truly expressing how I feel, until I crack. I never saw myself that way until she said that, because everyday I feel, emotions colour my world, but even though I have a expressive face, I don't show the depth of what I feel.

I haven't read all this thread, but it's been informative

[mlittrell]

Originally Posted by Tallulah

Okay, help us Ts out. From an INTP perspective, I may feel things internally, but I'm usually detached from my emotions, and they generally don't get taken into account when I argue or make a decision. I may rely on my intuition, or my "gut" feeling about something, but it won't necessarily be a "feeling" as I suspect F people would feel them. If I feel something strongly, I always try to take a step back so my logic won't get clouded by my subjective feelings.

So here's what I want to know (inspired by the Mock Emotions thread):

1) When you talk about feelings/emotions, how do you experience them?
2) Do you always go on your feelings? Do you feel that your emotions are "trustworthy?" Do you ever feel like your view of a situation is clouded by your personal feelings?
3) How does the feeling translate into action?
4) Anything else you feel like sharing. I'm just a T, so I'm not even sure how to word all this in F language.

You don't have to answer each individual question, as I probably repeated myself. Just give us an idea of what it's like to be F in this crazy world.

1) First off, I don't talk about my emotions that much. Emotions in general, i do, though i generally don't describe them.
2) no. most of the time. yes, so i do tend to use logic when it is needed (ya feelers can use logic too).
3) dumb question because my feeling is internally based so technically every decision, which affects my actions, is based on feeling;.
4) the only thing i would have to say is just because i am a feeler doesn't mean i cant use logic, in fact, i tend to use it quite a bit (my major IS informations systems ).

[Dwigie]

[quote=Tallulah;156806]Okay, help us Ts out. From an INTP perspective, I may feel things internally, but I'm usually detached from my emotions, and they generally don't get taken into account when I argue or make a decision. I may rely on my intuition, or my "gut" feeling about something, but it won't necessarily be a "feeling" as I suspect F people would feel them. If I feel something strongly, I always try to take a step back so my logic won't get clouded by my subjective feelings.

So here's what I want to know (inspired by the Mock Emotions thread):

1) When you talk about feelings/emotions, how do you experience them?
They are very changeable, a bit whimsical but pretty strong and usually kept under cover when they are strong. If they're not that strong I let them out. Usually it's pretty active under the surface but very few people know this. When I do talk with my feelings you can't miss it, you'll either feel attacked because my arguments are very long and passionate and it's always expressed at the "crisis moment". I let them build up usually and when they come out => or . If everything is going well or I'm in a good I go into my typical "lazy lovey dwigie", just chatting around and checking up on people or laying around calmly. I'm rarely excited though, it's either terrible anger and panic or zen and loving.
2) Do you always go on your feelings? Do you feel that your emotions are "trustworthy?" Do you ever feel like your view of a situation is clouded by your personal feelings?
No. Yes, I still am able to detach from time to time but it's usually to be able to understand how other people will feel about it. It's basically all about feeling, "objectively"?
3) How does the feeling translate into action?
Arguments, apologies, gifts, hugs, long discussions. I'm the kind of person who can knock on your door at 5 am just to make you hear me out because I want you. Basically I help you out or I'm a complete bitch.
4) Anything else you feel like sharing. I'm just a T, so I'm not even sure how to word all this in F language.

[Lady X]

i don't know how to answer those questions...
i feel like when i walk into a room that i can feel what each individual is feeling and i have an emotional reaction to each of them according to what they're feeling and it just bubbles over and i relate to them in a very personal real way because...i do feel intimate almost because i'm so sure i know who they are and how they feel and rather or not they want to have a real or surface conversation
and i lack any rational thinking regarding this...it's all organic...i don't think about it...or analyze it..
i also tend to gravitate towards positive happy people because just being around someone angry or sad makes me feel that way too...and i hate it...unless it's a friend who comes to me to talk

[cass]

well, the thing is, a i would never even think of those things. to me, those questions are kind of contradictions to what being a feeler means.

see like, you were asking questions about feeling in a very logical way. the whole thing about me, or us, is that we really do just "listen to our hearts". i know a lot of times i just feel a certain way and i don't know why. i can usually figure it out if i want to and then it will make sense.

[Lady X]

^^ agreed...and hi cass!