being a HSP, living with non-HSPs

[run]

I can't take the level of noise that these people think is necessary. I don't know of a diplomatic way to get my roommates to not blare the tv when they watch it, and not watch it all the god damn time. It makes me angry, and I think its justified. But the problem: They have a big screen.

Even it works out, I think I'll still have to leave a lot.

 

[Atomic Fiend]

I don't meant to be blunt, but tell them to turn it the fuck down. I live with people like this too. You know what I do? First I tell them to turn it down, and if they don't I go into there room and turn it down for them.

 

[lillyofthevalley]

I can't take the level of noise that these people think is necessary. I don't know of a diplomatic way to get my roommates to not blare the tv when they watch it, and not watch it all the god damn time. It makes me angry, and I think its justified. But the problem: They have a big screen.

Even it works out, I think I'll still have to leave a lot.

I use earplugs.

 

[Domino]

I understand what you mean, Run. I'm an HSP too, and on top of that, my nervous system is strung out due to a genetic condition. I have extremely sensitive hearing (I once tracked a very low scratching noise through the house to a grocery bag in the kitchen where a beetle had fallen in and was scraping a foreleg against the paper) and am acutely attuned to motion and smell.

When I'm in pain (which I am most every day), loud/repetitive noises or other strong stimuli can jack the pain right through the roof. Earplugs are a great idea, but also, do tell them to keep it down. They aren't the only ones living there, and if they want LOUD that badly, they can headphone it.

 

[heart]

I can't take the level of noise that these people think is necessary. I don't know of a diplomatic way to get my roommates to not blare the tv when they watch it, and not watch it all the god damn time. It makes me angry, and I think its justified. But the problem: They have a big screen.

Even it works out, I think I'll still have to leave a lot.

Yes, I live with a TV-aoholic. If he's home, the TV is on. I put music headphones on to drown it out. My mother was the same way.

Please come and answer my TV poll.

http://www.typologycentral.com/forums/fluff-zone/19980-tv.html

 

[Walking Tourist]

My dad is hard of hearing so he turns the TV volume way up. Fortunately, he is not a TV-a-holic. It is very uncomfortable for me. Then he tries talking to me over that racket. Of course, I don't understand him and he gives me the evil eye.
He also likes to throw things in the sink, which makes a huge noise. When I tell him to cut it out, he says that it doesn't bother my ears (as if he is wearing my ears).
I have actually been diagnosed with central auditory processing disorder and hyperacusis by an audiologist but many people around me seem to think that these conditions go away as soon as they become inconvenient for them.
I'm, of course, also an HSP.
Have any of you noticed that people think that your HSP-hood will vanish magically as soon as it becomes inconvenient for them??

 

[heart]

hyperacusis by an audiologist but many people around me seem to think that these conditions go away as soon as they become inconvenient for them...

Yes, I was dx with this too.

A lot of hsp symptoms are like the side symptoms that a person with a vestibular disorder gets.

 

[Domino]

I *have* noticed that, Tourist. It just makes things worse too. So sorry about your condition!

My INTJ bff was really great about my sensitivities (he's a bit cat-like himself), and would steer us away from things he knew would physically torment me. He "got" it, even when I was having to battle family members about it.

 

[run]

Have any of you noticed that people think that your HSP-hood will vanish magically as soon as it becomes inconvenient for them??

Yeah, its that plus the need to blare the fucking tv. Would you shout your conversation to somebody? Plus, I don't want to hear a commercial for Lysol disinfectant. Do ya mind?

 

[Domino]

Yeah, its that plus the need to blare the fucking tv. Would you shout your conversation to somebody? Plus, I don't want to hear a commercial for Lysol disinfectant. Do ya mind?

Sometimes I tape shows so I can fast-forward through all the ads, especially the really revolting/annoying ones.

 

[heart]

^ The commericals are the WORST. Especially during the news, all those drug ads. I don't want to hear about all those medical conditions when I am trying to relax. It's bad enough when someone needs medications for illness, we don't need to be reminded of sickness and such every damn day during dinner.

Then all those cheesey viagra commercials. Viva Vigara! Get a room grandpa, I don't want to see it!

Then at night, the curious cowboy, the bored legal teen hotties just waiting to talk to thirty something nerd losers on the phone, yeah right, and then endless infomercials.

docuhes, itching, maxi pads! Pepto-Bismol, Kaopectate! Tums Commericals where people gorge themselves and then need quick relief.... Ugh.---believe me if you need it, you know where to find it, don't need a commerical!

Then the screeching songs in some of the car ads, OMG, kill me now!

 

[Alwar]

I agree with Silently Honest's approach on being assertive. As a dominant alpha-male, I have no tolerance for insubordination in my territory. If the shit goes down, I don't mess around. When the beta's dissent from my authority I first of all, walk in wearing a pair of lederhosen with no shirt. So right off the bat they know the situation is serious. Second, I unleash a series of muscle flexing poses to reinforce who's boss before addressing the problem at hand; Doilies on the furniture? I don't think so. Curtains with flowers on them? Ain't gonna happen. Loud stereo? Yeah, you better turn that down. Once the beta's submit, I conclude by letting off a thundering war cry and fist pounding against my massive pectoral muscles, before finally retreating back to the mancave/harem.

 

[Domino]

I agree with Silently Honest's approach on being assertive. As a dominant alpha-male, I have no tolerance for insubordination in my territory. If the shit goes down, I don't mess around. When the beta's dissent from my authority I first of all, walk in wearing a pair of lederhosen with no shirt. So right off the bat they know the situation is serious. Second, I unleash a series of muscle flexing poses to reinforce who's boss before addressing the problem at hand; Doilies on the furniture? I don't think so. Curtains with flowers on them? Ain't gonna happen. Loud stereo? Yeah, you better turn that down. Once the beta's submit, I conclude by letting off a thundering war cry and fist pounding against my massive pectoral muscles, before finally retreating back to the mancave/harem.

Sweat on me, testosterone boy.

 

[heart]

A need a womancave to get away from TV. There's no room for here though...

 

[run]

But don't non-HSPs need that stimulation?

 

[Domino]

Yes, for some it *is* necessary, and it isn't a crime, it just becomes a problem when it's imposed on others.

 

[Halla74]

I can't take the level of noise that these people think is necessary. I don't know of a diplomatic way to get my roommates to not blare the tv when they watch it, and not watch it all the god damn time. It makes me angry, and I think its justified. But the problem: They have a big screen.

Even it works out, I think I'll still have to leave a lot.

Pardon my ignorance. What is HSP? Thank you for any info you can provide!

 

[Atomic Fiend]

Highly sensitive person.

 

[Tallulah]

I have HSP tendencies, too, but I do understand that I can't ask everyone in the world to adjust their habits for me. Generally, the compromise is that I understand that if someone's watching a movie, they generally want to watch it loud. I'll either deal or politely ask them to turn it down a notch or so. I usually mute the commercials, no matter what. I just can't stand them, and usually people don't care about watching them anyway. The one thing I can't stand is loud sports on tv, though. The best solution for that is separate tv rooms for such occasions. That or me leaving the house.

If someone has to go to bed early to be at work the next day, it's rude for the remaining people not to turn the tv down. If they go to bed at 6 for no reason, they can't really expect people to act like it's not still awake-time for the rest of the world.

Bottom line, I guess, it's just politeness and consideration. The HSP can expect to be taken into consideration, but probably can't expect to have his or her way all the time. Sometimes, they need to leave the house and do something else so that the others can enjoy their entertainment the way they like it.

 

[Spartacuss]

This is why I can't have roommates - Sensitivity to sound and motion would cause sleeplessness, which leaves me strung out and irritated. Plus, some people are obnoxious, completely inconsiderate brats about when (3 AM? Great!) and how much disturbance they cause and I'd rather not get into pointless arguments with them.