I just came across these this morning.
They sound interesting on the surface, so I'm going to check into them further.
I was hoping maybe some other folks might join me in exploring and discussing them.
Thomas-Kilmann Conflict MODE
Competing is assertive and uncooperative
Accommodating is unassertive and cooperative
Avoiding is unassertive and uncooperative
Collaborating is both assertive and cooperative
Compromising is moderate in both assertiveness and cooperativeness
Interpreting the Scores:
This exercise gives you two sets of scores for each of the five approaches to conflict. Calm scores apply to your response when disagreement first arises. Storm scores apply to your responses if things are not easily resolved and emotions get stronger. The higher your score in a given style, the more likely you are to use this style in responding to conflict. The highest score in each of the columns indicates a "preferred" or primary style. If two or more styles have the same score they are eually "preferred." The second highest score indicates ones's "backup" style if the number is relatively close to the highest score. A fairly even score across all of the styles indicates a "flat profile." Persons with a flat profile tend to be able to choose easily among the various responses to conflict.
[COLOR="Blue"]I've read a little bit more, and now I feel like I wish there was a book on how to move from the unhealthier ways of dealing with conflict to the healthier ways.
"Collaborating" seems to be the one to shoot for, but in my opinion, the issue at hand isn't always worth the effort of a full-out collaboration.
You might look into Sonnie Van Sandt's book Wired for Conflict. And Introduction to Type and Conflict by Killen and ???. both available at CAPT: Training, Books, Research for MBTI, Archetypes, Leadership, Psychological Type.. TJ, TP, NJ, NP seem to form the tightest correlations with conflict handling style. One thing we see is that people who've dealt with conflict tend to learn better ways to do it. Lots of older people, no matter what their type, stop avoidance...