Physical Touch 10
Quality Time 9
Words of Affirmation 4
Acts of Service 4
Receiving Gifts 3
Freude, schöner Götterfunken Tochter aus Elysium, Wir betreten feuertrunken, Himmlische, dein Heiligtum! Deine Zauber binden wieder Was die Mode streng geteilt; Alle Menschen werden Brüder, Wo dein sanfter Flügel weilt.
I don't know...I just feel like someone who doesn't really love you can use words of affirmation and physical touch to create the illusion they love you, but if they really love you, it comes in more through service and quality time. Love is action. Does anybody understand this?
I can see how quality time, words of affirmation, and physical touch can be empty.
But so can gift-giving and acts of service.
I agree that "Love is action", but all of these are actions aren't they?
Speaking words of affirmation, Spending quality time together, Touching----these are all clearly verbs, my man! ---Action words!
Different people will value different actions more than others.
It just comes down to which ones mean more to you personally.
In fact, in a long-term, committed relationship, it's very important not to assume that your partner cherishes exactly the same things you do.
Sometimes couples do speak the same "Love Language", and so they have very little difficulty meeting each other's needs.
But if you know what your partner's "Love Language" is --- even if it's very different from yours -- you will know what is most meaningful to your partner, and will , therefore, be better able to meet their needs.
You will also be able to understand them, rather than feel bad about it, when they fail to meet your needs.
Let me give you a practical example:
Let's say you personally value Gifts and Acts of service more than the other options.
Can you imagine if you lavished Gifts and Acts of service on your partner for years, only to find out that those things meant less to her than Physical touch, Words of Affirmation and Quality time?
Now if she knew that you valued Gifts and Acts of service more than the other things, she could say to herself, "Well, I know that his intentions were good, because he thought I valued the same things he did."
But if you had known what she valued most, you would have been able to give her what she actually wanted.
So, you see---Love is action---but the idea is to know which action is going to please your partner the most.
Quality time- 4
Words of affirmation- 6
Acts of service- 6
Physical touch- 11
Receiving gifts- 3
Wow, I didn't actually realise until taking this test and being forced to make a choice between 2, how much I rely on physical touch over everything to affirm love for me. It's true, it was non existant in my marriage, and yet very present at the start and was literally was cinched the deal in the beginning.
I just didn't actually realise until just now that I needed it.
Look at my results, girl. We can solve this.
30% - Words of Affirmation - 9
13% - Quality Time - 4
13% - Receiving Gifts - 4
7% - Acts of Service - 2
37% - Physical Touch - 11
-stellar renegade coo-oo-ooool this madness down,
stop it right on tiiiiime!
Words of Affirmation 4
Quality Time 7
Receiving Gifts 0
Acts of Service 10
Physical Touch 9
How to Interpret Your Profile Score
Your highest score indicates your primary love language. Your second highest score indicates your secondary love language. If two scores are identical, you are bi-lingual(you have two Primary love languages). If the scores of your primary language and your secondary language are close(for example, 10 and 9 respectively), it indicates both are important to you. The highest possible score for any one love language is 12.
Having a clear picture of your primary and secondary love languages will explain much of your past behavior. Think back over the past and ask yourself, "What have I most often requested of my spouse?" Chances are your answer will lie within the scope of your primary and secondary love languages. You have been requesting that which would meet your deepest need for emotional love. Your requests, however, might have come across as nagging or criticizing and thus drove your spouse away.