User Tag List

First 67891018 Last

Results 71 to 80 of 208

  1. #71
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    FREE
    Enneagram
    594 sx/sp
    Socionics
    LII Ne
    Posts
    42,333

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Eric B View Post
    Are you still using the volume you printed out years ago? ...
    Sorry, not even sure what you are talking about!

    I'm basically like that too, because the Supine and Choleric are diametric opposites, and it's like a tug of war at times. Even though Control covers leadership and responsibilities, the speed at which we tend to undertake responsibilities is nevertheless tied to our Inclusion temperament. (I know, that can throw you off, but it does make sense, for you usually have to approach people on a surface interaction level before you can control them). Hence, I don't really want to control or be responsible for others either, precisely because of my social reservation.
    It's kinda hard for me to track nowadays.

    In the first half of my life, I was so socially anxious I had only a small select circle of friends and often would cry/break down if I had to go somewhere where I did not know anyone.

    (The first time my parents tried to send me to camp, in 4th grade, I tried so hard to be brave -- I remember fighting to remain composed -- but after I just broke down and bawled for 45 minutes, they canceled and took me home... leaving me filled with shame AND relief. The next year, I still was terrified but stuck it out... and once I got past the first two days, I was okay even if I felt disconnected.)

    In adulthood, today, I'm still overwhelmed by meeting groups of new people without an anchor there to steady me, but I also enjoy the newness of it and have more confidence.

    But even after I know them, I hate telling them what to do. I mean, I loathe it. My strong natural instinct is to (1) provide information, then (2) get the heck out of the way and let them do their thing. About the easiest it ever got for me was with my kids... because I knew they were not adults and needed me to guide them more proactively -- but between me and the ISFJ parent, it's pretty clear which one of us finds it easier to dictate and direct vs inform and empower.

    So for me, it comes out simply in wanting things my way, and then, if I feel more secure on the social level, I'll tend to readily cross boundaries in trying to make things my way or what I think makes sense. And, then, of course, I won't want anyone to control me either. Cognitively, it is explainable through the Ti+Ne.
    I think so, as I described above. Except for the fact that I don't actually like it, even if I know the people well. Being a worship leader for a number of years was very hard for me because I would have a clear vision for where things had to go... but a total and complete reluctance to take charge and tell people what had to be done. I just wanted them to see what I saw, then act in alignment. When I left that position, I was both relieved and disappointed -- relieved that I no longer had to be directive, disappointed that I now had no way to implement my vision.

    You also have the typical NTP argumentativeness or oneupmanship, which I also associate with the Choleric. It will obviously be more apparent for ENTP's, because of the extroversion.
    True, that is the one area I see where it comes out. My natural instinct is to debate/push things (which I've been giving more rein to), but I usually dial it way back because I know it has ramifications on the social structure around me and value having freedom/flex within that social structure (because I've built up some social capital) to do my thing, rather than burning my capital on arguing issues that might not be of ultimate importance to me. [I.e., one-upping people will often lose you respect and flex space; instead, I work hard to integrate, and then I have a lot of flex space when I need to push something.]

    Also, while I'm slow to start projects, once I do, I usually persevere until completion, and am pretty thorough.
    I used to be, but don't have much "sticktoitness" nowadays, sigh.

    That also would be tied to the immature Si+Fe. An NTJ's "Choleric" behavior will be from the Te+Ni, and yet since their wanted Inclusion will be low (Melancholy or Choleric), they will not desire to maintain connections like that. Matching this, their immature functions will be Se+Fi.
    Now you've highlighted a difference I saw between me and the INTJs I've tried to bond with -- I was always puzzled by how they typically did not seem to show an interest in the overt way I did in pursuing/maintaining bonds, although it was clear they liked the people involved. I was far more active in pursuit of such things.

    Control preference (especially for those whose Inclusion/Affection tends to interpersonal harmony) will be about how we react when this ideal inevitably does not work out.
    Okay. Yes, I do the active interconnect thing... but if that fails me, I switch to "Okay, you do your thing, and I'll do mine, and I'm happy with that." I "release" them and myself...
    ... and get really mad if they come after me to exert some level of control.

    Yeah, now I really wish she had come to our meetup. There don't seem to be many Supines in my circle. Be nice to see others for a change.
    It was just a bad time for me. There was cost involved, and the weekend before I had just been across the country and was exhausted, and I was in crunch time at work and couldn't afford off...

    .... and then... there was the SNOW. Arg.

    But I would like to attend the next, if at all possible.

    You also would have seen Jenocyde's Choleric side (in a particular incident), to give an illustration of what I was saying above.
    Was that the one mentioned here, at the bar?

    Here's what fits with what you are saying. My responses would have been as follows:
    1. Try to accommodate/connect (the Supine thing).
    2. Withdraw/Ignore.

    But the third is the "okay, fine -- let's go at it" response, and I would have responded very similar.

    I just don't like it because it commits me to a course of action = commits my energy to a course of action + burns bridges / spurs probable rejection and thus closure of options.

    It just means I'm not expressive of a lot of affection or deep connection, however, I do generally respond to it.
    yes, same here. I'm extremely responsive to other people's displays, if I am committed to the relationship; I just suck at initiation, and not because I do not care.

    (Even when it means me leaving her to make decisions because I don't feel like being bothered with it at that point).
    That was actually my normal mode for much of my marriage. I think nowadays I engage a lot more in decisions even if I do not want to be bothered, because I see the relationship as reciprocal and now empathize with the other person having to make lots of decisions without my input (it's not fair)... I feel engaged.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  2. #72
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    FREE
    Enneagram
    594 sx/sp
    Socionics
    LII Ne
    Posts
    42,333

    Default

    Geez. No kidding, but this sounds like a "Care Manual for Female Conservative Christian ISFJs" I know. Literally, I could expect this list to be republished with that heading.

    Special Things Significant Others Can Do For The Supine

    * Tell them every day in words and actions that they are loved, needed, and appreciated.
    * Try to understand their needs to socialize and provide them with the emotional support to do so. Supines are not initiators; therefore, significant others need to initiate socialization.
    * Work very diligently to raise their self-image by reinforcing the positive and downplaying the negative.
    * Help them make decisions, take on responsibilities, and share responsibility for the decisions they do make.
    * Do not force Supines to act independently very often or for long periods of time.
    * Never force Supines to be the disciplinarian of the family.
    * Encourage them to give their input and state their preferences.
    * Encourage them to be more assertive in sharing the things that make them angry.
    * Accept their dependency without dominating them.
    * Give Supines recognition for the service they perform.

    What A Supine Can Do For Themselves

    * Try to develop a deep, personal friendship with someone (preferably the Lord) with whom they can share decisions and responsibilities.
    * Find employment or an environment where they can undertake tasks while interacting with people.
    * Try to discover life situations where they are not forced to take on too much responsibility or perform as leaders but rather function in supportive roles.
    * Learn to recognize their anger as anger and to deal with constructively.
    * Learn how to be more assertive and to confront when confrontation becomes necessary. Supines need to voice their needs and desires.
    * Provide themselves with situations where they can supplement their needs for love and affection by seeking more friends, social interaction, and a deeper relationship with the Lord.
    * In order to diminish their anxiety and stress, learn to initiate telephone calls and
    * read books or watch television program about people.

    Behavior Changes To Bring A Supine Temperament Closer To God

    * Learn to deal with anger constructively and in ways pleasing to God.
    * Raise their self-perception by learning to see themselves as a wonderful, loved creation of God. This will make the fear of rejection from man less intense.
    * Learn to lessen anxiety by interacting with God and Christ as they would any other surface relationship.
    * Learn that God is always with them and will take care of them in order to lessen their fear.
    * Learn that manipulation through emotional blackmail supersedes the will of God.
    * Accept love and affection from God and Christ to supplement what they do not receive from human means. This will help prevent sexual sins.
    * Learn to seek direction in making decisions from God and Christ. This will
    * strengthen their will power.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  3. #73
    Senior Member BlueFlame's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    MBTI
    ENFJ
    Enneagram
    3w2
    Socionics
    ENFJ
    Posts
    181

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Eric B View Post

    Then, we have Blue Flame, who has Supine in Inclusion, Sanguine Phlegmatic in Control, which would seem way off. Do you have questions about what your type is? (Your closing statement seems to indicate that). I notice you came close on Judging (58%), so if you were ENFP, then, it would be a bit closer. S-SP- I would expect for an ISFP. Could that be possible?

    Then, both you and ENFPfer as extroverts, and Supines or Supine Phlegmatic in Inclusion. This is possible, as the Supine is said to have extroverted energies, because of the fact that they "want" (respond) as an extrovert. so that is not impossible (though Supine Phlegmatic will have only a moderate want, and is more likely a solid introvert).
    Thanks for noticing my results lack logic
    It could simply be user error, so I'll explain why I picked what I did.

    Inclusion: Supine I definitely have the want of an extrovert, and I AM an extrovert energy-wise. But I do come across as shy (or stuck-up, I'm told) simply because I tend to be self-conscious and I try to get the feel of the situation and the hierarchy and things like that before I jump on in. I have a pretty high aversion to rejection, so I approach others FAR less than I would actually like, and I do feel very hurt when I'm excluded. I had a pretty traumatic childhood and was forced into isolation a lot, so I've just always attributed it to that.

    Control: Sanguine-Phlegmatic Now that I re-read , I'm not sure that's the most accurate choice. I think I'm more of a Supine-Phlegmatic or Sanguine. I think I appear to be dependent because I abhor failure and I like the have the reassurance of people that are important to me, but in the end, I do what I want and what I think is right, and if anyone actually attempts to control me, I'll eat them alive . I really don't want control over other people. I want everyone to do their part to reach our common goals. I WILL attempt to exert control isf what you're doing negatively affects me, but I don't like it at all. But I do go through periods when I feel like I'm completely reliant on others, just because I've run out of my own energy or neglected myself to the point of not knowing what I want to do, anyway.

    Affection: Phlegmatic-Choleric Like I said, I really had a hard time with this one. I'm not touchy feely at all outside of my husband and kids, and even then, I give a lot more than I actually require and feel very invaded when someone is laying it on too thick. Emotionally, I think I require a lot of non-physical affection to feel accepted by someone really close to me, but outside of that, I don't, but I tend to give a lot of it, which is why Is why I was also leaning toward Choleric-Phlegmatic.

    As far as my type goes, I'm always unsure! I posted the more forgiving J/P percentage I've gotten...it's usually more along the lines of a 3% difference. My cognitive functions always show outrageous use of Fe, pretty closely followed by Ni/Ne and Te. Si and Ti tend to fall below that and Fi and Se are pretty low.
    I've considered that I could be a very messed up ENFP or a very messed up ENFJ or something entirely different, but in the end, I function as more of an ENFJ when I'm healthy, and as more of an ISTP when unhealthy, with random habits that I picked up from my largely unhealthy ENFP mother.

    So, in closing, no, I'm not sure of my type .

    ~*79% Extraverted*~
    ~*74% iNtuition*~
    ~*74% Feeling*~
    ~*58% Judging*~

    Enneagram Type: SX 3w2

  4. #74
    :) INFtha14's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 sp/sx
    Posts
    1,894

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    Well.. isn't that what codependent is?

    People don't think "I want to be codependent." Instead, they see the world in a way that leads them to indulge in codependent behavior because they think it's the way it's supposed to be, and when they don't do the codependent thing, they feel overwhelming anxiety.

    I definitely don't think people think that either. Maybe a naive vibe I give off, I've been told " she's got to be careful, people will take advantage of that o.O". Interesting...

    (Note: Substitute various psychological conditions in lieu of codependence, to same effect.)

    Your mom thinks it's wrong for you to be so aloof, or not to take care of her, or not allow her to take care of you. Because it unsettles her and she feels adrift, most likely.

    This is true it seems. A big thing with my mother is she seems to have a hero complex, she needs people to need her I suppose. I'll always need her but not the way she wants.

    My problem was that the family kept it veiled, then finally dumped it on me all at once. I was rather blindsided, but it was an eye-opener for how they were perceiving me and justified a lot of my intuitions about how they were interacting with me.

    yikes!! All at once?

    But I always was very independent. My parents didn't even know I could read until the kindergarten teacher sent home a note asking them if they knew. I sat around in my room playing records and reading the books that came along with them, until I apparently developed an extensive vocabulary. I find it interesting that, even at that age, I hid things from others.... at least, I think I actively hid my capabilities, because later in life I remember feeling anxious around my parents when they found out any of my capabilities.

    Was this again part of autonomy developing, or was it fear of codependence and/or judgment? Interesting... that's funny I felt that way with any of my own interests or anything involving gaining autonomy Especially since that was a sensitive issue with her.

    Maybe Fear of judgement of what they'd say to you? As I grew into my teens more I would keep more and more to myself from my parents/sisters for fear of them being judgemental/threatened by my autonomy? Maybe even a fear they'd try to take it away or limit me. Does that sound like a possibility for you? Hmm...


    Yes, I grew up in a very SFJ environment (both family and religion).
    Still not sure how much was innate and what I learned to feel shame for.

    I would like to say that any Supine/approval-desiring behavior was a development, not innate, on my part... but the fact I was susceptible to it at all (since I know others who, even in that environ, have no trouble shrugging it off) makes me wary of thinking that even if it is palatable.
    Yeah that must be tricky defining between the two.
    What is Feeling?
    Feeling is primarily a process.....that imparts to the content a definite value in the sense of acceptance or rejection. In the same way that thinking organizes the contents of consciousness under concepts, feeling arranges them according to their value. Feeling, like thinking, is a rational function, since values in general are assigned according to the laws of reason...
    (Carl Jung, Psychological Types, Chapter XI - Definitions)

  5. #75
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    FREE
    Enneagram
    594 sx/sp
    Socionics
    LII Ne
    Posts
    42,333

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by DuchessofTheShadows
    This is true it seems. A big thing with my mother is she seems to have a hero complex, she needs people to need her I suppose. I'll always need her but not the way she wants.
    Oh.. yeah... you are not "playing your role" in the script. She has her role self-assigned, and like an actor who suddenly veers off the script and starts ad libbing her lines... you're throwing the story into confusion.

    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer
    My problem was that the family kept it veiled, then finally dumped it on me all at once. I was rather blindsided, but it was an eye-opener for how they were perceiving me and justified a lot of my intuitions about how they were interacting with me.

    yikes!! All at once?
    Long story short, I made changes they didn't like... not in the least... so any tolerance they had given me for other things over the years suddenly got thrown in my face unexpectedly.

    ... I didn't stick to the script either!

    Lesson #212: People like scripts.
    (AKA "'Whose Line Is It Anyway?' isn't for everyone.")


    Interesting... that's funny I felt that way with any of my own interests or anything involving gaining autonomy Especially since that was a sensitive issue with her. Maybe Fear of judgement of what they'd say to you? As I grew into my teens more I would keep more and more to myself from my parents/sisters for fear of them being judgemental/threatened by my autonomy? Maybe even a fear they'd try to take it away or limit me. Does that sound like a possibility for you? Hmm...
    yes, I did that too. I never engaged my family much, I always withdrew and hid in my room.
    I guess I did feel I would be judged if I was "bad" AKA "did not meet unspoken expectations" and I did not want to be a character in my parent's ongoing drama.

    ... but I did anyway, without planning to.
    (I was the good kid who did not stir up trouble and did everything well.)

    That's the problem for kids; they have no power to truly escape the drama.
    Adults have more power and autonomy.

    Anyway, I think you are onto something here!

    Yes, I took disappointment in me by others pretty poorly, and both of my parents projected disappointment on me. So avoiding them altogether was the best.

    I didn't want them to have any sense of what I could really do or not do, then they had no way to comment either way on it. I wanted to be accepted by them without running the risk of rejection by letting them know anything.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  6. #76
    :) INFtha14's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 sp/sx
    Posts
    1,894

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    Oh.. yeah... you are not "playing your role" in the script. She has her role self-assigned, and like an actor who suddenly veers off the script and starts ad libbing her lines... you're throwing the story into confusion.

    Long story short, I made changes they didn't like... not in the least... so any tolerance they had given me for other things over the years suddenly got thrown in my face unexpectedly.

    ... I didn't stick to the script either!

    Lesson #212: People like scripts.
    (AKA "'Whose Line Is It Anyway?' isn't for everyone.")

    yes, I did that too. I never engaged my family much, I always withdrew and hid in my room.

    I guess I did feel I would be judged if I was "bad" AKA "did not meet unspoken expectations" and I did not want to be a character in my parent's ongoing drama.

    ... but I did anyway, without planning to.
    (I was the good kid who did not stir up trouble and did everything well.)

    That's the problem for kids; they have no power to truly escape the drama.
    Adults have more power and autonomy.

    Anyway, I think you are onto something here!

    Yes, I took disappointment in me by others pretty poorly, and both of my parents projected disappointment on me. So avoiding them altogether was the best.

    I didn't want them to have any sense of what I could really do or not do, then they had no way to comment either way on it. I wanted to be accepted by them without running the risk of rejection by letting them know anything.
    You got it Sister. It's like you get my predicament and I get your predicament. They seem very similar.

    That's it. I need to meet you, your awesome haha. I could totally
    see us going over our frustrations in a cafe or something.

    OMG...that is too familar. I too have started to make changes
    they didn't like/approve and it presented itself "even more" in receiving silent treatments/ even threats.

    One point when I first informed family about my plans I literally got backed into a corner while being yelled at via mother. I actually felt fear for my physical life. But the bark is always bigger then the bite my friend .

    With ya there *pushing against expections aka Script*

    I even been talked to " Why do you always stay in your room?" heh..you would too when home haha.

    Exactly i think some parents expect their children to be easily controlled like puppets on a string.

    I can't look at people who are disappointed at me. I just like you withdraw internally feeling maybe even some shame.

    Right on, cut off there power by distancing yourself just enough from giving them information that they'd need in order to do so.

    Amen especially to that last paragraph.
    What is Feeling?
    Feeling is primarily a process.....that imparts to the content a definite value in the sense of acceptance or rejection. In the same way that thinking organizes the contents of consciousness under concepts, feeling arranges them according to their value. Feeling, like thinking, is a rational function, since values in general are assigned according to the laws of reason...
    (Carl Jung, Psychological Types, Chapter XI - Definitions)

  7. #77
    Senior Member Kristiana's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Posts
    326

    Default

    Hi Eric!

    Want to help me out here? I looked at all the profiles, and here is what I think fits me:

    Inclusion: Phlegmatic-Melancholy, Melancholy, and Choleric-Phlegmatic fit me best. I tend to be very selective as for whom I let in my "inner circle," but am generally quite friendly (especially for an introvert).

    Control: It's between Melancholy-Phlegmatic and Supine-Phlegmatic. I'm generally independent and prefer little control over me, and having little control over others. I don't mind having a boss if (s)he and I connect well and if she is kind and reasonable.

    Affection: This one is trickiest for me to type myself. I am VERY affectionate with my husband, and I need a LOT of affection from him. I am not physically affectionate with almost everyone else (except relatives, but that's different). I don't mind physical affection from close friends but generally do not need much of it and rarely give it. Sanguine and Melancholy seemed to fit very well in some areas but very poorly in others.

    MBTI: I'm a solid INTJ. Very very strong N. Low to moderate introvert. Low to moderate T. Moderate J. High Ni. Well developed Te but also well developed Fi and Ne.

    Enneagram: I don't know for certain but a healthy 4 fits me fairly well. I would have definitely been an unhealthy-ish 4 when I was a young teenager.
    j'adore les chats

  8. #78
    ⒺⓉⒷ Eric B's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    548 sp/sx
    Socionics
    INTj
    Posts
    3,442

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    Sorry, not even sure what you are talking about!
    You had said you had printed out my page, way back.
    I think so, as I described above. Except for the fact that I don't actually like it, even if I know the people well. Being a worship leader for a number of years was very hard for me because I would have a clear vision for where things had to go... but a total and complete reluctance to take charge and tell people what had to be done. I just wanted them to see what I saw, then act in alignment. When I left that position, I was both relieved and disappointed -- relieved that I no longer had to be directive, disappointed that I now had no way to implement my vision.

    True, that is the one area I see where it comes out. My natural instinct is to debate/push things (which I've been giving more rein to), but I usually dial it way back because I know it has ramifications on the social structure around me and value having freedom/flex within that social structure (because I've built up some social capital) to do my thing, rather than burning my capital on arguing issues that might not be of ultimate importance to me. [I.e., one-upping people will often lose you respect and flex space; instead, I work hard to integrate, and then I have a lot of flex space when I need to push something.]
    Was that the one mentioned here, at the bar?
    Yes, and it was actually over my wife and I! The guy was complaining because we weren't ordering beers.
    Here's what fits with what you are saying. My responses would have been as follows:
    1. Try to accommodate/connect (the Supine thing).
    2. Withdraw/Ignore.

    But the third is the "okay, fine -- let's go at it" response, and I would have responded very similar.
    To me, I would not start a fight over that either. There are a lot worse things people have done so something like that was the least. I just figured it was some cranky old guy, so what can you expect from him? This would be the introversion, and I was in his place, so I did not feel he really crossed any boundary of mine.

    Quote Originally Posted by BlueFlame View Post
    Thanks for noticing my results lack logic
    It could simply be user error, so I'll explain why I picked what I did.

    Inclusion: Supine I definitely have the want of an extrovert, and I AM an extrovert energy-wise. But I do come across as shy (or stuck-up, I'm told) simply because I tend to be self-conscious and I try to get the feel of the situation and the hierarchy and things like that before I jump on in. I have a pretty high aversion to rejection, so I approach others FAR less than I would actually like, and I do feel very hurt when I'm excluded. I had a pretty traumatic childhood and was forced into isolation a lot, so I've just always attributed it to that.
    I also forgot to mention, that ENJ is In Charge, and this is the Interaction Style, and involves social skills. That would seem the opposite of Supine.

    Control: Sanguine-Phlegmatic Now that I re-read , I'm not sure that's the most accurate choice. I think I'm more of a Supine-Phlegmatic or Sanguine. I think I appear to be dependent because I abhor failure and I like the have the reassurance of people that are important to me, but in the end, I do what I want and what I think is right, and if anyone actually attempts to control me, I'll eat them alive . I really don't want control over other people. I want everyone to do their part to reach our common goals. I WILL attempt to exert control isf what you're doing negatively affects me, but I don't like it at all. But I do go through periods when I feel like I'm completely reliant on others, just because I've run out of my own energy or neglected myself to the point of not knowing what I want to do, anyway.
    The pure Sanguine in Control has the independent-dependent swing. This I have associated with the SP's Se (leads them to seek stimulation and then cool off). Supine-Phlegmatic would make more sense for what you describe. The transition is not as dramatic as the "swing".
    Affection: Phlegmatic-Choleric Like I said, I really had a hard time with this one. I'm not touchy feely at all outside of my husband and kids, and even then, I give a lot more than I actually require and feel very invaded when someone is laying it on too thick. Emotionally, I think I require a lot of non-physical affection to feel accepted by someone really close to me, but outside of that, I don't, but I tend to give a lot of it, which is why Is why I was also leaning toward Choleric-Phlegmatic.
    This could well be what would make you "In Charge". I have acknowledged tha possibility that the Affection score could throw the correlation off. I also imagine that in some people, Affection could be the Interaction Style instead of Inclusion, as I assume. The Interaction Style covers interpersonal ("affective") skills, and the Inclusion/Affection categories simply divides this into surface social and deep personal. So Interaction Style could well justifiably be either area.
    As far as my type goes, I'm always unsure! I posted the more forgiving J/P percentage I've gotten...it's usually more along the lines of a 3% difference. My cognitive functions always show outrageous use of Fe, pretty closely followed by Ni/Ne and Te. Si and Ti tend to fall below that and Fi and Se are pretty low.
    I've considered that I could be a very messed up ENFP or a very messed up ENFJ or something entirely different, but in the end, I function as more of an ENFJ when I'm healthy, and as more of an ISTP when unhealthy, with random habits that I picked up from my largely unhealthy ENFP mother.

    So, in closing, no, I'm not sure of my type .
    Well, byt the cognitive processes, it would sound to lean more to ENFJ. So perhaps that's what you are, and again, your Interaction Style be Affection rather than Inclusion.

    Quote Originally Posted by Kristiana View Post
    Hi Eric!

    Want to help me out here? I looked at all the profiles, and here is what I think fits me:

    Inclusion: Phlegmatic-Melancholy, Melancholy, and Choleric-Phlegmatic fit me best. I tend to be very selective as for whom I let in my "inner circle," but am generally quite friendly (especially for an introvert).

    Control: It's between Melancholy-Phlegmatic and Supine-Phlegmatic. I'm generally independent and prefer little control over me, and having little control over others. I don't mind having a boss if (s)he and I connect well and if she is kind and reasonable.

    Affection: This one is trickiest for me to type myself. I am VERY affectionate with my husband, and I need a LOT of affection from him. I am not physically affectionate with almost everyone else (except relatives, but that's different). I don't mind physical affection from close friends but generally do not need much of it and rarely give it. Sanguine and Melancholy seemed to fit very well in some areas but very poorly in others.

    MBTI: I'm a solid INTJ. Very very strong N. Low to moderate introvert. Low to moderate T. Moderate J. High Ni. Well developed Te but also well developed Fi and Ne.

    Enneagram: I don't know for certain but a healthy 4 fits me fairly well. I would have definitely been an unhealthy-ish 4 when I was a young teenager.
    The Melancholy ranges in Inclusion would fit Chart the Course-INJ. Choleric Phlegmatic is squarely extroverted, and moderate in responsiveness. However, in Control, you got me completely beat.:ouch: And INTJ as Melancholy/Choleric was one of the most successful matches. So I don't know about that.

    In affection, if you express a lot and need a lot, that sounds like Sanguine. I don't know why you would think it sounds like Melancholy as well. They often do not want a lot of affection (think of a woman whose attitude is "don't touch me") and do not give much.
    APS Profile: Inclusion: e/w=1/6 (Supine) |Control: e/w=7/3 (Choleric) |Affection: e/w=1/9 (Supine)
    Ti 54.3 | Ne 47.3 | Si 37.8 | Fe 17.7 | Te 22.5 | Ni 13.4 | Se 18.9 | Fi 27.9

    Temperament (APS) from scratch -- MBTI Type from scratch
    Type Ideas

  9. #79
    Nickle Iron Silicone Charmed Justice's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Posts
    2,808

    Default

    Eric, I just wanted to explain my selections further now that I have a bit of time.

    I decide upon Supine Phlegmatic for inclusion because of the ambiverted nature of the temperament. I've always been shy, reserved, commitment and service oriented, and relatively private. At the same time, I've also been quite a bit socially aggressive(social ladder climbing). As a young-er person, people viewed me as very outgoing, friendly, upbeat, popular, and enthusiastic. I have a handful of lifelong friends. I went through a traumatic period in my life and I changed in the process. I can't say that I'm remotely socially aggressive anymore. I turn down quite a number of opportunities to befriend people. The again, my priorities have changed, and I've apparently gotten older too. I never minded being alone though, or felt "lonely" in being by myself, so long as it was my decision and not a form of punishment. Journaling, reading, and daydreaming kept me occupied enough.

    As far as control...I suppose I'm moderately controlling, mostly when I feel as though I'm being evaluated in some way or I'm fed-up about something. I have a real distaste for incompetence and piggy-backing in professional and academic environments and prefer that people be independent, prepared, and display know-how. I have been a manager, and found it fitting for my personality; although, I ideally prefer egalitarian environments. I've worked for myself for years now, and I enjoy that as well. In general, I don't mind answering to other people in a work environment. I accept more control than I appreciate in my personal life, but tend to trust that people will do as they do, and am optimistic that those things will be in the best interest of those involved.
    There is a thinking stuff from which all things are made, and which, in its original state, permeates, penetrates, and fills the interspaces of the universe.

  10. #80
    Senior Member Kristiana's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Posts
    326

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Eric B View Post
    The Melancholy ranges in Inclusion would fit Chart the Course-INJ. Choleric Phlegmatic is squarely extroverted, and moderate in responsiveness. However, in Control, you got me completely beat.:ouch: And INTJ as Melancholy/Choleric was one of the most successful matches. So I don't know about that.

    In affection, if you express a lot and need a lot, that sounds like Sanguine. I don't know why you would think it sounds like Melancholy as well. They often do not want a lot of affection (think of a woman whose attitude is "don't touch me") and do not give much.
    For the affection, I am very Sanguine with my husband, but only with my husband. The Melancholy part fits in where I said, "I am not physically affectionate with almost everyone else (except relatives, but that's different). I don't mind physical affection from close friends but generally do not need much of it and rarely give it."

    I wouldn't say I am the don't-touch-me type, but I am not touchy feely at all either (except with my husband). Does that still sound like Sanguine?
    j'adore les chats

Similar Threads

  1. [NT] NTs and Affection
    By Brendan in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 22
    Last Post: 02-16-2009, 02:40 AM
  2. [INTP] INTP and affection
    By KLessard in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 95
    Last Post: 01-03-2009, 08:22 PM
  3. Type and Affective Dreams
    By beyondaurora in forum General Psychology
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 10-23-2008, 07:23 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO