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Johari/Nohari [ -> Harikari? ] Charts

Athenian200

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Why is it so hard for everyone to do the Nohari section? It's just a list of negatives. Everyone has negative traits, so why is it bad to describe them? I don't get it. One person thought I was both observant and imperceptive. I think those are antonyms, which makes it kind of funny. :)
 

Totenkindly

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Why is it so hard for everyone to do the Nohari section? It's just a list of negatives. Everyone has negative traits, so why is it bad to describe them? I don't get it. One person thought I was both observant and imperceptive. I think those are antonyms, which makes it kind of funny. :)

I think I am taking it seriously, rather than casually.

And sometimes the words there are not quite accurate, or there are not enough words that truly match up.

And a negative, if not prepared for, often can have a very negative impact.
Even a positive person will be looking at the negatives as 'things to correct.'

So if I feed someone inaccurate words, it has a very likely chance of not only making them feel awkward/embarrassed but also driving them to correct things about themselves that aren't actual problems. If I'm going to give someone constructive criticism, I'm going to make sure it's either accurate or that I have qualified the limits of my comments.

In this list, you get a limited set of choices, and you can't qualify anything.

PS. Yours was easy to do. :devil:
 

Rhu

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(1) the things I see as weak inside myself that no one else seems to notice (!)
(2) the things that others agree on from the outside, that just did not cross my mind, really.
One thing I've hypothesized from looking at these things before, perhaps especially in insecure individuals, is that:

Adjectives picked in Johari windows tends towards "positive aspects that we have in common," while the Nohari tend more towards, "where I think I'm better than you."
 

Mycroft

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I don't mind helping out for the people who want it, but given that I think everyone's personae on this board and their actual personalities are vastly different, I have to question how useful the results will be.
 

Economica

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One thing I've hypothesized from looking at these things before, perhaps especially in insecure individuals, is that:

Adjectives picked in Johari windows tends towards "positive aspects that we have in common," while the Nohari tend more towards, "where I think I'm better than you."

The latter makes sense to me; the former not so much. I find I notice how people deviate from me while taking for granted how we are similar - especially with regard to strengths (I am Disagreeable and hence always good for pointing out a flaw :cry:).

I don't mind helping out for the people who want it, but given that I think everyone's personae on this board and their actual personalities are vastly different, I have to question how useful the results will be.

:yes: Personally I'm using the charts to find out how I am perceived on this board. I (naively?) don't think they would glean much new information among RL friends and acquaintances.
 

Totenkindly

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I don't mind helping out for the people who want it, but given that I think everyone's personae on this board and their actual personalities are vastly different, I have to question how useful the results will be.

I'm going to quibble about the assumptions made with the bolded phrase [At the very basic, how can you actually make a statement like that WITHOUT even knowing everyone IRL... and thus you WOULD be actually to better critique them accurately? Isn't your statement inherently contradictory?], but I agree that the xohari pages must be taken with a sense of their limitations.

I also see where Rhu is going. We each have our internal checklist of values and tend to make our evaluations of others based on the things we do and do not value. I think the bias comes out more strongly on the negative critiques, not as much on the positive critiques... It seems easier for people to accept someone else's strengths, even if they are different than ours; but the negatives really irk us and clash with our values more directly, making them seem larger and harder for us to be objective about as we should be.

(It is not that big an issue to me, as much as I'm making it sound. I guess I am more fussing over what I see as flaws/weaknesses in the criticisms, rather than the overall value/direction of the criticism. The windows have to be taken with a grain of salt. They are just useful general "aha" tools, of which the limitations need to be understood.)
 

Zergling

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It doesn't seem like people have been doing the newer ones.
 

Economica

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I'm going to quibble about the assumptions made with the bolded phrase

Oh yeah, I don't agree that online and offline personalities are vastly different (maybe for people who repress their personalities offline?). I do think they're different enough that it's more meaningful to do separate charts.

It doesn't seem like people have been doing the newer ones.

I'll get around to it soon! :)
 

INTJMom

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I made my real life friends take the tests for me.

Which do you think would be more interesting to examine:

1. comparing the separate internet (not yet made) and RL versions?
2. just posting the RL ones and asking for feedback from internet?
3. some other option
I would be curious to know how the internet ones differ from the ones from people who know you IRL.
 

Mycroft

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I'm going to quibble about the assumptions made with the bolded phrase [At the very basic, how can you actually make a statement like that WITHOUT even knowing everyone IRL... and thus you WOULD be actually to better critique them accurately? Isn't your statement inherently contradictory?], but I agree that the xohari pages must be taken with a sense of their limitations.

Oh yeah, I don't agree that online and offline personalities are vastly different (maybe for people who repress their personalities offline?). I do think they're different enough that it's more meaningful to do separate charts.

True enough. A propensity for hyperbole has always been a weakness of mine.

I don't mind helping out for the people who want it, but given that I think everyone's personae on this board and their actual personalities are different, I have to question how useful the results will be.

Fixed!

Edit: Man, it's so tempting to tick off "stupid" on the NTs' Noharis just to screw with them.
 

Usehername

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I would be curious to know how the internet ones differ from the ones from people who know you IRL.

Noteable Differences (skipping out any votes with less than 4 IRL):

Known to Self & Others
Real Life: Reflective (5); Clever (4).
MBTIc: Reflective (3); Confident (3); Independent (3).

Known to Others
Real Life: Energetic (4); Logical (6); Observant (6); Organized (4); Searching (4); trustworthy (5).
MBTIc: Intelligent (6); Searching (3); Self-Assertive (4)

Not Known to Others (but known to self)
Real Life: wise
MBTIc: clever

To sum:
Although generally speaking, the parts of my identity came across both online and IRL, they appear to be differently weighted between the two worlds.
For instance, although my friends did pick things like intelligent/ingenious/knowledgeable (which were all selected a few times but not many times each), the dominant theme to my Real Life friend identity was my clever/observant/needing to grow myself aspect of my personality. The Ni, perhaps? The TJness showed up IRL also with my logical/organized part getting a lot of hits.
Reflective came up on both. Would this be attributed to INxx? IxxJ?
However, on MBTIc, not one person picked clever. What do people think this means? (I'm asking not because I care that no one picked clever, but what does this mean for how I am different IRL vs. online?) Is this a different use of Ni in my two worlds, or is this just plain different?
I've also had people handwrite thank-you notes or verbalize that they appreciate my wisdom when it comes to helping them decipher a situation or figure out what to do or just flesh out an issue. But, not one of my RL friends mentioned "wise". To be honest, I am not surprised. If I didn't have the thank you notes, etc. to remind me, I might be second-guessing this of myself if my friends didn't see it in me. But, it's just that I give off my goofy-energy-clever-wondering vibes far more than I allow people to see my personal, serious side. I'm not hiding it, but it's quite personal and when I'm not intimately relating to people, like when I'm around multiple friends, I tend to stay distant from this personal side of me.

(Most of my RL friends did not do the negative traits; the ones that were picked, however, were distant, withdrawn, aloof and insensitive. Perhaps my ENFJ skills aren't being employed as much as they could be around my RL friends that know the real me very well.)
 

Totenkindly

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Edit: Man, it's so tempting to tick off "stupid" on the NTs' Noharis just to screw with them.

Ha, now THAT made me laugh! (And I am jealous for not thinking of it first.)
 

Athenian200

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Edit: Man, it's so tempting to tick off "stupid" on the NTs' Noharis just to screw with them.

If you thought that was tempting, did you even notice "incompetent" was an option? (Although that would be cruel, a bit like pouring acid on a wound.)
 

Totenkindly

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If you thought that was tempting, did you even notice "incompetent" was an option? (Although that would be cruel, a bit like pouring acid on a wound.)

"ahhh... it burns, it burns...!!"
 

TenebrousReflection

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Interesting concept...

Johari Window - Describe TenebrousReflection
Nohari Window - Describe TenebrousReflection

Trying to even think of things for the Nohari window for others is very difficult, so if you see soemthing from me that doesn't seem to fit, its probably more of trying to speculate on "maybe a little of this" kinda thing because trying to choose 5 or 6 negatives (and sometiems even 1) is difficult (I think I'll go with anonymous for the nohari stuff).
 

Zergling

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This was a nice thread to bump, it was kind of interesting to be able to go back and see people's attitudes from a few months ago.

(Also, I filled in a few people that I hadn't done the first time through.)
 
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