N v. S

[Provoker]

I've gotten to know this certain ESFP and I've come to the conclusion that we're worlds apart. Besides being the complete antithesis of an INTJ, what I find most frustrating is the S factor. Incidentally, I don't speak sensor and this person certainly doesn't speak the language of intuition. In fact, every time I teach her a few new words of intuition (to use a metaphor) she says the most irrelevant sensor thing ever - to the extent that I wonder if there is anything turning in her brain. I was walking on campus with her the other day at night and explaining how the social sciences are quite abstract compared to hard sciences and then she wasn't responding to anything I was saying so I commented on the weather and said "It's really nice out tonight" and she said "wow that was delayed" (because I didn't say it until I finished conveying the concept I was discussing). This was just one incident of many where I finish a long silioquy and she interjects with sensor talk. It's like talking to a 5 year old some times. It seems to me that this person registers nothing in the abstract and simply only responds to things that are concrete and in the moment. Thus, at any given time if I explain something she will not register the big picture nor the essence - she will only register words that trigger concrete things. Keeping in mind that I'm 84% intuitive and 90% thinking (according to several tests) after explaining something she will only register about 15% of it. If I shove in a really concrete and picturesque word that will trigger a thought in her to the exclusion of everything else. On the other hand, she will start on about so and so in the club or some small talk and I immediately zone out (as I don't want to waste my brain listening to meaningless stories when I could be working through problems in my head). Have any of you had similar experiences?

[Jack Flak]

Originally Posted by Provoker

Have any of you had similar experiences?

Yes. I would say the most practical & useful thing I've learned from studying personality and relations is that some people are not destined to be comfortable interacting with one another. If you recognize an incompatible person, try to keep your distance.

[murkrow]

Eh, I don't have this problem so much.

Not with Se anyway, Si is boring though.

[Littlelostnf]

I have a sensor friend that talks about nothing else besides her job and her dogs. She is lovely tho and even tho I do get bored she has other qualities (besides the fact that we have a long history of friendship since childhood) that keep me engaged in the relationship. If this person is only a casual friend and she really bores you. Stop hanging around her. She will begin to sense you find her childish and boring and that could possibly lead to her having hurt feelings so stop while you're ahead and ease off the friendship. Find someone who you can talk to and you won't have to talk about.

[Night]

Like you, I have a hard time understanding things as they truly are, minus the pretensions we enable ourselves with as an excuse for elevated ignorance.

iNtuitives always seem so shallow to me...

[Littlelostnf]

Originally Posted by Night

Like you, I have a hard time understanding things as they truly are, minus the pretensions we enable ourselves with as an excuse for elevated ignorance.

iNtuitives always seem so shallow to me...

hahahahaha
Good for you.

[proteanmix]

Originally Posted by Provoker

Mental Masturbation

.

[Jeffster]

Provoker, I can relate to how your friend feels. Sometimes when people talk to me, it's like "blah blah blah blah blah blah blah tires blah blah blah blah blah blah raincoat blah blah blah blah blah blah blah steak."

And I'm like "All I got was tires, raincoat, steak."

Depending on my self-esteem at the time, I've usually come to one of two conclusions.

1. I'm a dumbass.
2. I'm good at pinpointing the actual important stuff in a rambling mess of words.

[rhinosaur]

When someone tries to change the topic, it usually implies that they don't care about what you're saying. By interjecting those comments about the weather, she was trying to find something else that you could both talk about.

Also, don't automatically assume a sensor is dumb because they don't want to discuss your silly abstract idea in great depth.

[Little Linguist]

Okay, being a crazy ENFP who is interested in almost anything, I'm cool with talking about anything - even sensor topics (whatever that means). No problems with the neatest pop music, what actor is banging what actress (although, admittedly, it isn't my favorite subject), how wonderful the flowers smell, or even how awfully the dog farted. I'm even cool with you talking about your favorite porn star or how you'd love to have a nice juicy steak. Or the latest gossip - in small amounts.

However, if you even dare start talking about the weather I will just .

K?

I warned you.

Anything else is fine, but that "subject" is totally off limits.

(Waiting for some jackass remark about the weather now. <gets axe ready>)