You know you're an INFJ when...

[sanveane]

Originally Posted by DigitalMethod

Well no, I would guess INTJs can deal with door slams. I mean of course it would affect them, but apathy is a good friend.

I was talking more about, feelings.

INTJs tend to, with-hold their feelings and inner self and only allow that to be seen by a select few who they know will accept and understand them.

INFJs usually fit the bill in that regards, if they are close to the INTJ.

I was thinking more-so about a positive cry, not, a negative door-slam-cry.

Although I guess, once the INTJ reveals their inner-teddy, the INFJ would then know the INTJs weak spots and be able to exploit them with just a few words, which in turn could make the INTJ cry. Cry because they were hurt, but more-so because the person they were close to hurt them.

Oh ok, I thought you were talking about the bad kind of crying... hehe I like that expression: the INTJs' inner teddy!

EDIT: I wouldn't make someone cry on purpose, it just happened over the course of having a relationship with someone who was INTJ.

[Antisocial one]

I find this thread quite interesting.

Why do you guys or girls think that you could make an INTJ(me) to cry in the case that we are friends?

[Evan]

Originally Posted by Antisocial one

I find this thread quite interesting.

Why do you guys or girls think that you could make an INTJ(me) to cry in the case that we are friends?

Because I can see the things that people repress. Everyone does it...

Pull those things to the surface, uncontrollable emotions ensue. If you could control those emotions, why would you repress anything?

[DigitalMethod]

Originally Posted by dissonance

Because I can see the things that people repress. Everyone does it...

Pull those things to the surface, uncontrollable emotions ensue. If you could control those emotions, why would you repress anything?

Dissonance hit it right on the head.

My friends can't make me cry.

It's a type of connection where you allow your feelings to roam and be vulnerable. It's a type of connection where the rewards are always greater. I don't have that with my friends, I only have that my mom and my closest friend.

[Lucifer]

I do not repress emotions, please don't use "everyone" dissonance.

[sanveane]

Originally Posted by ByMySword

I call it the INFJ bridge burn.

And I don't think using it means that you can't stand up for yourself at all. Before I burn a bridge, I always make sure I've had the last word (which is another way you know you're an INFJ, lol).

I won't just cut off all contact till I have some type of closure, and to me that is making my points heard and having the last word.

After that, its pointless to continue keeping yourself in a position that only brings out negative emotions.

At the same time, I don't just leave because I can't take something anymore. That would be cowardice. I can fight it out with the best of them when I have to, but there are times where one needs to disassociate themselves from a situation. The trick is being mature enough to know when to do that and when not to.

I meant that I'm more aware of patrolling my borders in real time so I don't have to resort to it. Possibly a poor choice of words on my part. I can always stand up for myself if I don't minimize someone's actions. That's been the problem in the past. I tend to see a number of reasons for why someone is behaving poorly, it negates the emotional impact for me and I tend to cut them a lot of slack. I find complicated people to be interesting and I'm friends with a few people that everyone else pretty much hates. But in reality those people are hated because they can be a pain the arse sometimes. I don't give them as much rope as I used to. I've learned that if I do they will invariably push the button which leads to the door slam thing. Also, I haate drama. So boring.

I've only done the door slam when a person has a pattern of taking a lot of advantage... I lose all respect and interest in that person... It just doesn't seem to get to that point anymore for me. But I like knowing that I have that inside!

[Antisocial one]

Originally Posted by dissonance

Because I can see the things that people repress. Everyone does it...

Pull those things to the surface, uncontrollable emotions ensue. If you could control those emotions, why would you repress anything?

That is true.

I think that I don't repress anything. I simply have huge emotional deficit.


In the case you want to make someone cry, in what areas would you aim?

[sanveane]

Leading question, but do other INFJs find that your imaginings are always very focused? That your 'daydreaming' is with a purpose? I don't think I ever engage in imaginings with out a purpose for any length of time, I very much enjoy thinking about different ways to optimize my own life, i.e. realizing my dreams. I really relate to the sentiment that INFJs are rarely at peace with themselves, always feel that there is something else I should be doing. Anyone else?

[ByMySword]

^^^^^Absolutely. I love going into my Ni mode. But sometimes it can cause me problems, i.e. when I'm at school and really need to be paying attention to what the professor is talking about.

[ByMySword]

You know you're an INFJ when you constantly become tongue tied during conversations because the thoughts in your head are trying to come out faster than your mouth can process them into words.