ENFP/ENFP Freedom?

Tophsquatch · 08-02-2008, 06:54 AM

Hi guys,
I met another ENFP at work; a cute brunette who speaks MBTI. We've started joking around/borderline flirting and I came to realize; I've never had anybody understand me like this. She commented that nobody gets her humor except me. She's goofy, I'm goofy, she's clumsy, I'm clumsy. We both seem to come from the same planet and we've been living on an alien world

our entire lives and have finally found each other.

Okay, okay, so as you all know, I'm probably being dramatic, but living in a world full of people who don't speak your language and think you're a dork, it's a relief to meet someone who's been through the same exact thing as you and...well...both of you think that they are super-smooth spies on a (if I can steal a line from Chick...) "philosowarrior" mission from God to save the world.

Is it too early to say this is freedom?

I work to better myself every second of everyday; when I look for my eventual wife--my soulmate, the love of my life--I don't want someone that will depress me because I'm a 'P' and she's a 'J' and she's a 'nag' and I'm 'lazy'. You may ask "who will pay the bills then?". I will...I always have, on time and without a problem. Yes I'm sure I'm an ENFP. I had to work on myself to become this responsible; it's called MATURITY!

So, as even Keirsley says, any two mature people from any type can come together for a good marriage...I want better than good. I just need a homeport...another chunk of ENFP-asteroid floating out in space to gravitate to when I get lonely.

SO beyond the "bills" argument, can anyone think of any good reason why an ENFP-ENFP relationship...all baggage out of the way, shouldn't be bliss? I'm not expecting complete perfection, but I do desire understanding and clear communication above all else. OMGoodness do we have that so far. We're the biggest absented minded people geniuses I've ever met.

HELP COMMENT PLEASE!!

Babylon Candle · 08-02-2008, 11:12 AM

there is a huge difference between:

"OMGZ we are so awesome together being weirdz!!"

and

hot and heavy ATTRACTION. Often it is not a mirror that creates attraction. Its those people who are so DIFFERENT from us that often excite us. I had an ENFP/ENFP thing go sour when we realized that it was like "dating myself". so then we were just friends...and now i barely ever see her...anyways....

it is true that any two healthy...etc etc.... just go for it! dont let MBTI rule your life!

alcea rosea · 08-02-2008, 11:43 AM

Any relationship could work. It's much more than MBTI type.

...the ENFP's I have met in real life do not strike me as very interesting which is quite dissapointing. :/

ixquic_creation · 08-02-2008, 06:30 PM

As long as you're not so alike that it's slightly creepy, go for it.

Angry Ayrab · 08-02-2008, 06:46 PM

I have often thought that this would be the coolest thing on earth, but... drum rolls I worry about the boredom thing... you know where you say whatever... and she's an enfp too so she might be like whatever one day... Not saying it is going to happen but that is my only worry.

But like everyone else says, Eff mbti, don't let it rule your life.

phoenix13 · 08-02-2008, 07:20 PM

Sounds like the stuffs of a wild affair... not so much a marriage, though. Like the others say, the boredom will getcha in the end.

findthejake · 08-02-2008, 08:21 PM

Naw man, what's up with all these negative nancy's! Boo!

Live it up my friend. Chase the sun and find your home. I completely understand what you're saying about being around an ENFP and having them understand you and understanding them. It's refreshing.

phoenix13 · 08-02-2008, 08:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by findthejake

Naw man, what's up with all these negative nancy's! Boo!

Live it up my friend. Chase the sun and find your home. I completely understand what you're saying about being around an ENFP and having them understand you and understanding them. It's refreshing.

Did you know cat AIDS is the #1 killer of household cats? *wawaaaaaaa*

Tophsquatch · 08-02-2008, 10:20 PM

"Originally Posted by findthejake
Naw man, what's up with all these negative nancy's! Boo!

Live it up my friend. Chase the sun and find your home. I completely understand what you're saying about being around an ENFP and having them understand you and understanding them. It's refreshing."

Thanks to AngryAryab and FindtheJake; FindtheJake for giving me encouragement and AngryAryab for voicing my fears. I'd be terrified that one of us would just get board one day and leave; the only thing is, I wouldn't. She may do that to me, but I was raised with a very strong sense of stick-to-it-tiveness despite my flaky nature; if I start a relationship and make a commitment, I will keep to it; even if I get bored, so long as nobody cheats on the other.

I may know everything about her, but together we don't know everything about the world; I think that'd be the key to any ENFP/ENFP relationship; we would never stop living the adventure. They key is finding amusement with the rest of the universe, and experienciing that together...though occasionally seperately so we could make each other curious as to what the other has found.

Keirsley warned that two NF's may burn out on constant pilgramage (he was speaking to religion, but I think it works in general too)...so occasionally, we'd need to take it slow for a bit and recenter ourselves. I think it could work though.

Any other thoughts, good, bad or otherwise?! Seriously people, you know my viewpoint, but please don't be afraid to share yours, maybe it'll give me more insight that I haven't thought of yet.

Udog · 08-02-2008, 11:17 PM

I know an ENFP that came really close to another relationship with another ENFP. She said the main problem for her was the mutual intensity. Sometimes she needs someone that is calmer and less emotional to help bring her back down, and the emotional intensity eventually exhausted her.

What is really important at this time is whether or not she wants to date someone like her. If she finds you attractive and fun, I say go for it! It may result in the relational equivalent of a firework - but how beautiful it will be!

08-02-2008, 06:54 AM	#1 (permalink)
Tophsquatch Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Type: ENFP Posts: 30	ENFP/ENFP Freedom? Hi guys, I met another ENFP at work; a cute brunette who speaks MBTI. We've started joking around/borderline flirting and I came to realize; I've never had anybody understand me like this. She commented that nobody gets her humor except me. She's goofy, I'm goofy, she's clumsy, I'm clumsy. We both seem to come from the same planet and we've been living on an alien world our entire lives and have finally found each other. Okay, okay, so as you all know, I'm probably being dramatic, but living in a world full of people who don't speak your language and think you're a dork, it's a relief to meet someone who's been through the same exact thing as you and...well...both of you think that they are super-smooth spies on a (if I can steal a line from Chick...) "philosowarrior" mission from God to save the world. Is it too early to say this is freedom? I work to better myself every second of everyday; when I look for my eventual wife--my soulmate, the love of my life--I don't want someone that will depress me because I'm a 'P' and she's a 'J' and she's a 'nag' and I'm 'lazy'. You may ask "who will pay the bills then?". I will...I always have, on time and without a problem. Yes I'm sure I'm an ENFP. I had to work on myself to become this responsible; it's called MATURITY! So, as even Keirsley says, any two mature people from any type can come together for a good marriage...I want better than good. I just need a homeport...another chunk of ENFP-asteroid floating out in space to gravitate to when I get lonely. SO beyond the "bills" argument, can anyone think of any good reason why an ENFP-ENFP relationship...all baggage out of the way, shouldn't be bliss? I'm not expecting complete perfection, but I do desire understanding and clear communication above all else. OMGoodness do we have that so far. We're the biggest absented minded people geniuses I've ever met. HELP COMMENT PLEASE!! __________________ Friends don't let friends park; accidents cause people.

08-02-2008, 06:46 PM	#5 (permalink)
Angry Ayrab Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Type: ENFP Location: tucson Posts: 619	I have often thought that this would be the coolest thing on earth, but... drum rolls I worry about the boredom thing... you know where you say whatever... and she's an enfp too so she might be like whatever one day... Not saying it is going to happen but that is my only worry. But like everyone else says, Eff mbti, don't let it rule your life. __________________ http://badges.mypersonality.info/badge/0/7/79928.png

08-02-2008, 10:20 PM	#9 (permalink)
Tophsquatch Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Type: ENFP Posts: 30	Drift "Originally Posted by findthejake Naw man, what's up with all these negative nancy's! Boo! Live it up my friend. Chase the sun and find your home. I completely understand what you're saying about being around an ENFP and having them understand you and understanding them. It's refreshing." Thanks to AngryAryab and FindtheJake; FindtheJake for giving me encouragement and AngryAryab for voicing my fears. I'd be terrified that one of us would just get board one day and leave; the only thing is, I wouldn't. She may do that to me, but I was raised with a very strong sense of stick-to-it-tiveness despite my flaky nature; if I start a relationship and make a commitment, I will keep to it; even if I get bored, so long as nobody cheats on the other. I may know everything about her, but together we don't know everything about the world; I think that'd be the key to any ENFP/ENFP relationship; we would never stop living the adventure. They key is finding amusement with the rest of the universe, and experienciing that together...though occasionally seperately so we could make each other curious as to what the other has found. Keirsley warned that two NF's may burn out on constant pilgramage (he was speaking to religion, but I think it works in general too)...so occasionally, we'd need to take it slow for a bit and recenter ourselves. I think it could work though. Any other thoughts, good, bad or otherwise?! Seriously people, you know my viewpoint, but please don't be afraid to share yours, maybe it'll give me more insight that I haven't thought of yet. __________________ Friends don't let friends park; accidents cause people.

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08-02-2008, 11:12 AM	#2 (permalink)
Babylon Candle HasGeometry = HasMeaning Join Date: Feb 2008 Type: ENTJ Location: Texas Posts: 989	there is a huge difference between: "OMGZ we are so awesome together being weirdz!!" and hot and heavy ATTRACTION. Often it is not a mirror that creates attraction. Its those people who are so DIFFERENT from us that often excite us. I had an ENFP/ENFP thing go sour when we realized that it was like "dating myself". so then we were just friends...and now i barely ever see her...anyways.... it is true that any two healthy...etc etc.... just go for it! dont let MBTI rule your life!

08-02-2008, 11:43 AM	#3 (permalink)
alcea rosea Summersocks Join Date: Nov 2007 Type: ENFP Location: Northern Europe Posts: 2,650	Any relationship could work. It's much more than MBTI type. ...the ENFP's I have met in real life do not strike me as very interesting which is quite dissapointing. :/

08-02-2008, 06:30 PM	#4 (permalink)
ixquic_creation Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Type: INFP Posts: 31	As long as you're not so alike that it's slightly creepy, go for it.

08-02-2008, 07:20 PM	#6 (permalink)
phoenix13 Accepted! Join Date: Apr 2008 Type: ENFP Location: Maryland, USA Posts: 1,019	Sounds like the stuffs of a wild affair... not so much a marriage, though. Like the others say, the boredom will getcha in the end.

08-02-2008, 08:21 PM	#7 (permalink)
findthejake Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Type: ENFP Location: AZ Posts: 258	Naw man, what's up with all these negative nancy's! Boo! Live it up my friend. Chase the sun and find your home. I completely understand what you're saying about being around an ENFP and having them understand you and understanding them. It's refreshing.

08-02-2008, 11:17 PM	#10 (permalink)
Udog Hi There Join Date: Aug 2008 Type: INfp Posts: 1,606	I know an ENFP that came really close to another relationship with another ENFP. She said the main problem for her was the mutual intensity. Sometimes she needs someone that is calmer and less emotional to help bring her back down, and the emotional intensity eventually exhausted her. What is really important at this time is whether or not she wants to date someone like her. If she finds you attractive and fun, I say go for it! It may result in the relational equivalent of a firework - but how beautiful it will be!