What do INFPs think of INTJs?

[Jennifer]

Originally Posted by toonia

Why is that? Does it have to do with personalizing the criticism? Some criticism is a show of great respect and affection.

Yes. You did know JJJ you are being a yellow-bellied, weak-livered quivering puddle of metaphysical jello? And you should stick up for yourself more?

(Just saying it cause... I like ya!)



poke

[JivinJeffJones]

Originally Posted by toonia

Why is that? Does it have to do with personalizing the criticism?

Yes, I think so.

Originally Posted by toonia

Some criticism is a show of great respect and affection.

I intellectually acknowledge that this can be the case.

[JivinJeffJones]

Originally Posted by Jennifer

Yes. You did know JJJ you are being a yellow-bellied, weak-livered quivering puddle of metaphysical jello? And you should stick up for yourself more?

(Just saying it cause... I like ya!)

I apologize for my etc etc.

[Jennifer]

Originally Posted by JivinJeffJones

I apologize for my etc etc.

NooOoooOooooOO!!!! You have to PUSH BACK!!! Push!

sigh.

[JivinJeffJones]

Originally Posted by Jennifer

NooOoooOooooOO!!!! You have to PUSH BACK!!! Push!

sigh.

I'm sorry if I etc etc.

(and now I know your buttons)

[Jennifer]

Originally Posted by JivinJeffJones

I'm sorry if I etc etc.

(and now I know your buttons)

You know, it's hard to fight with a passive-aggressive who refuses to move on to the second part!

I'm sorry, my interest in this experiment is purely clinical and not personal.

[JivinJeffJones]

Originally Posted by Jennifer

You know, it's hard to fight with a passive-aggressive who refuses to move on to the second part!

I'm sorry, my interest in this experiment is purely clinical and not personal.

Give me something to argue about. I can argue. I can be intractable. But it has to be something I care about (care in the non-feely sense of the word). Because I'm looking at my belly right now, and although it is quite pasty, it is certainly not yellow. As for my liver, it's doing pretty well considering.

[toonia]

Originally Posted by Jennifer

quivering puddle of metaphysical jello?

Sounds like a compliment to me.

Originally Posted by JivinJeffJones

I intellectually acknowledge that this can be the case.

Experience can play a role in it as well. My long-term mentor of 12+ years in my primary area of creativity shaped my view of criticism because I could always sense his respect for me. There was never an emotional context, but taking the time to critique someone's efforts is how one communicates that the skill worth cultivating. Criticism can be the same process of nurture that a gardener takes with his plants, cutting away the dead leaves and weeds, adding soil and sunlight, so that the plant can grow into what it ideally is in and of itself. There is a certain respect of boundary that is felt in this type of criticism. It is the highest expression of respect I have experienced.

edit: It's because they can see some aspect of who you 'could' be, that you cannot see yet. By revealing short-term flaws we cannot see, the mentor reveals long-term abilities we couldn't foresee.

[JivinJeffJones]

Originally Posted by toonia

Experience can play a role in it as well. My long-term mentor of 12+ years in my primary area of creativity shaped my view of criticism because I could always sense his respect for me. There was never an emotional context, but taking the time to critique someone's efforts is how one communicates that the skill worth cultivating. Criticism can be the same process of nurture that a gardener takes with his plants, cutting away the dead leaves and weeds, adding soil and sunlight, so that the plant can grow into what it ideally is in and of itself. There is a certain respect of boundary that is felt in this type of criticism. It is the highest expression of respect I have experienced.

I suspect INFPs deal so badly with criticism partly because we hate disappointing people, especially people we're close to. We should be used to it, because we often do it thanks to our vagueness with deadlines and other practical matters. It's kind of hard to say how much is INFP and how much is just me. I know that I have a fairly strong sense of inadequacy when it comes to practical areas, so I'm well aware of my shortfalls in that regard. Sometimes when people criticize me in an ongoing way (ie actually trying to bring about change rather than just registering disapproval) I can overreact (eventually) out of my own sense of frustration with myself.

[Jennifer]

Originally Posted by JivinJeffJones

But it has to be something I care about...

I suspect INFPs deal so badly with criticism partly because we hate disappointing people, especially people we're close to. We should be used to it, because we often do it thanks to our vagueness with deadlines and other practical matters. It's kind of hard to say how much is INFP and how much is just me. I know that I have a fairly strong sense of inadequacy when it comes to practical areas, so I'm well aware of my shortfalls in that regard. Sometimes when people criticize me in an ongoing way (ie actually trying to bring about change rather than just registering disapproval) I can overreact (eventually) out of my own sense of frustration with myself.

You're an inadequate and disappointing mass of unmet deadlines and expectations who really needs someone to change you!

*poke*

[peeks through fingers to see reaction]