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  1. #11
    Senior Member Dwigie's Avatar
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    But aren't all introverts considered "rather" avoidant?
    Sometimes I feel like I'm "on Mercury"-

  2. #12
    Senior Mugwump Apollanaut's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Synarch View Post
    We see you there being invisible, but since you're not causing problems or competing with us we leave you alone like a child playing by himself.

    Also, aren't INFJ's considered rather avoidant? I seem to remember reading this.
    I'd rather not answer that
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  3. #13
    Senior Member Simplexity's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Synarch View Post
    We see you there being invisible, but since you're not causing problems or competing with us we leave you alone like a child playing by himself.
    See, that is an important distinction. I know all too well that despite my actions I still register on extraverts radar, which is fine by the way. I only wish I could actually not be on the radar as consistently as they register me. Most people on this board actually understand what an introvert is so that is not a big barrier/ issue, IRL it is.
    My cold, snide, intellectual life is just a veneer, behind which lies the plywood of loneliness.

  4. #14
    Senior Member Bella's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Apollanaut View Post
    It occurred to me the other day that I like to maintain a certain level of "invisibility" in my daily life. For example, I like to stay at work for an extra hour after most people have left, I time my lunch break after everyone else has come back from theirs, I only go for breaks when the social room is likely to be quiet, I have two work areas (desk and lab) and will tend to use the one with the fewest people close by.

    Keeping a low profile has it's advantages: I can quietly pick up a huge amount of inside information without others' being aware of me doing so. It also gives me a certain freedom to "slip between the gaps" of conventional policies and procedures into a place where novel ideas and approaches can be explored.

    Sometimes I'll want to share one of my discoveries, so I'll "switch off" the invisibility for a while and present my ideas and findings to my colleagues. They are likely to say things like "Where did this come from?" or "I had no idea you were thinking about this!".

    Sometimes the invisibility can be a curse, when you have something really important to share, but no-one seems to see or hear you at all! (Hello! I'm over here! Can anyone see me!).

    From an Extraverts point of view, it must be quite frustrating: sometimes we're there and ready to participate, at other times we've vanished without a trace and left no forwarding address.

    I'd like to hear of fellow introverts' experiences of this invisibility power (in positive and negative ways).

    I'd also like to know if "Introvert Invisibility" is as frustrating to Extraverts as I suspect.

    I can relate to this, especially what you said in the first paragraph.
    I can go for days with hardly being noticed and hardly interacting with anyone. I don't get sad or upset about it, but it's odd that you have no witness to your life. I think that was said in a movie once, and I think it was used within the context of a romantic relationship - living closely with someone is having a witness to your life. Extroverts have that way more than we have. I might not feel sad about this but I do think it is sad.

    I might be wrong, but I don't the the Exroverts are too perturbed. Why would you be bothered about someone being in the background if they're always in the background. An extrovert becoming quiet and withdrawn is more likely to get attention.
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  5. #15
    Once Was Synarch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Aimahn View Post
    See, that is an important distinction. I know all too well that despite my actions I still register on extraverts radar, which is fine by the way. I only wish I could actually not be on the radar as consistently as they register me. Most people on this board actually understand what an introvert is so that is not a big barrier/ issue, IRL it is.
    As even introverts comprise the external social and physical reality, we must sweep you with our lidless Sauron-like radar. For true invisibility, office doors work well, though. Any doors really.
    "Create like a god, command like a king, work like a slave."

  6. #16
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bella View Post
    I can relate to this, especially what you said in the first paragraph.
    I can go for days with hardly being noticed and hardly interacting with anyone. I don't get sad or upset about it, but it's odd that you have no witness to your life. I think that was said in a movie once, and I think it was used within the context of a romantic relationship - living closely with someone is having a witness to your life. Extroverts have that way more than we have. I might not feel sad about this but I do think it is sad.

    I might be wrong, but I don't the the Exroverts are too perturbed. Why would you be bothered about someone being in the background if they're always in the background. An extrovert becoming quiet and withdrawn is more likely to get attention.

    The only extroverts who are perturbed are the ones who actually like and desire to interact with introverts, but many extroverts could care less because they are busy with other extroverts.

  7. #17
    Senior Member millerm277's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Apollanaut View Post
    I'd like to hear of fellow introverts' experiences of this invisibility power (in positive and negative ways).
    You described it perfectly. I've noticed the "power" as well.

    Teachers never call on me in class, even though I'm obviously not paying attention, I've even been sitting in the front of the room doing work for another class while the teacher was trying to teach, and they don't notice, while with anyone else, they'll get yelled at instantly.

    I never fall under suspicion of doing anything, it isn't even thought of by anyone. I walk in late to class, and no one notices. I've bought $3 in merchandise at the store, and am wearing a baggy sweatshirt with odd shapes showing in the pocket, and I don't even get a second glance from the security guy at the door. I'm setting off a huge quantity of fireworks in my front yard, the police officer just keeps driving by, and the same guy the next day gives my neighbor a ticket for a some tiny firecrackers.

    No one ever thinks I'm listening or care about whatever it is they're discussing, because I'm quiet and generally keep to myself. I'm ALWAYS listening, and as you've said, I find out a ton of useful information from doing so.

    I also kind of like how surprised people are when I do have stuff to say and the like. (Note: With friends or people I know well, this is different obviously).
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  8. #18
    Senior Mugwump Apollanaut's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by millerm277 View Post
    You described it perfectly. I've noticed the "power" as well.

    Teachers never call on me in class, even though I'm obviously not paying attention, I've even been sitting in the front of the room doing work for another class while the teacher was trying to teach, and they don't notice, while with anyone else, they'll get yelled at instantly.

    I never fall under suspicion of doing anything, it isn't even thought of by anyone. I walk in late to class, and no one notices. I've bought $3 in merchandise at the store, and am wearing a baggy sweatshirt with odd shapes showing in the pocket, and I don't even get a second glance from the security guy at the door. I'm setting off a huge quantity of fireworks in my front yard, the police officer just keeps driving by, and the same guy the next day gives my neighbor a ticket for a some tiny firecrackers.

    No one ever thinks I'm listening or care about whatever it is they're discussing, because I'm quiet and generally keep to myself. I'm ALWAYS listening, and as you've said, I find out a ton of useful information from doing so.

    I also kind of like how surprised people are when I do have stuff to say and the like. (Note: With friends or people I know well, this is different obviously).
    This is exactly the sort of invisibility I was thinking of!

    I've been known to use the "Jedi Mind Control" trick when I want to be ignored ("These are not the droids you are looking for") with some success.
    INFJ 9w1 sx/sp/so

    "A wizard is never late. Nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to." - Gandalf The Grey

    And if I only could,
    I'd make a deal with God,
    And I'd get him to swap our places,
    Be running up that road,
    Be running up that hill,
    With no problems.

    - Kate Bush

  9. #19
    Senior Member Dwigie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hmm View Post
    The only extroverts who are perturbed are the ones who actually like and desire to interact with introverts, but many extroverts could care less because they are busy with other extroverts.
    Good point, good point.
    Sometimes I feel like I'm "on Mercury"-

  10. #20
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    My invisibility is more something I turn on or off in my mind. Sometimes when I'm in a group I will just be quiet and observe. Then I am usually invisible. Or if I'm very focused on a task I am invisible. But when I don't want to be invisible anymore then I talk to someone or pay more attention to those around me. So, its more how I see myself than how others see me.
    Introverted 100% Extraverted 0%
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